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Alcohol

The Limelight

The Dark, Secret Life of The Hoff

Now that her messy, messy divorce from Knight Rider/Baywatch star David Hasselhoff is finally over, Pamela Bach is freely dishing about the poor man's troubles. And, really, it behooves us to read every last detail. In 2002, for example, Hasselhoff called Bach from a hotel one dark night. "I'm drunk and I think I'm dying," he said. Then the line went dead. More »

nostalgia

One More Thing: Booze in Movies and Television

Dear, sweet, precious, life-sustaining alcohol has starred in more movies and TV shows than any actor or actress could ever hope to star in. And tonight let us give the nectar of the gods its due. What's your favorite hooch scene? As ever, I'll humbly recommend one after the jump. More »

never forget

The Worst 'Wall Street Crisis' Report Ever (So Far)

"Trinity Church, which became an emotional refuge amid the fallout at ground zero, is offering services to its neighbors during a time of crisis: free spiritual and psychological counseling for workers who have been affected by the current Wall Street financial turmoil." Oh ha, it's the 9/11 of bankers getting fired! Will the free spiritual counseling encourages downtown assholes to renounce materialism or something? (Is that likely from the this particular church?) More: "And because they are typically measured by the size of their paychecks — bonuses, in particular — their self-worth is deeply threatened when the money evaporates." Words fail! Anyway. Free counseling! As usual, self-medication is by necessity self-financed. So far that's not stopping anyone! More »

booze

Wait, We Like Sarah Palin Again!

"An even bigger clash involved a proposed city ordinance backed by Stambaugh to close the town bars at 2 a.m. instead of 5. Stambaugh says he believed this would help curb late-night drunken driving at a time when, according to Stein, the former mayor, 'people were driving out from Anchorage to the valley for more alcohol and crashing.' But Palin, as a council member, had voted against the measure—making her the favored candidate among bar owners, one of whom held a fund-raiser for her." [Newsweek, Photo]

Journalists! An Important Link! Headed to the Twin Cities for the GOP convention? Here are the bars that will be observing the temporary 4 a.m. bar-close in convenient map form! The thing is tho they're pretty much the worst fucking bars in Minneapolis (and St. Paul, which has like one good bar period). Stick with the strip clubs! [SaintPaulitan]

journalismism

Which Terrible Cable News Sports Bar Should You Hang Out At in Denver?

It's time for the Democratic National Convention in lovely, boring Denver! Are you psyched? Journalists are! Because they're going to be drunk for a week, thousands of miles from home! Just two of the many venues in which hardworking journalists will be getting their drink on the over the next few days are the bars taken over by the cable news networks. Fox's hip FOX Experience and the down-home CNN Grill. Which one looks more like the worst possible place you could ever get drunk? Let's see! More »

from the archives

The Long Lost "Drunk Larry King" Tapes

The mysterious Young Manhattanite writes: For months now I have been looking for a classic clip of Larry King drunk on his radio show that I heard way back in the dawn of the public Internet when my friend downloaded it from a newsgroup. It's NOWHERE online now. My friend finally found the cassette tape he transfered it to back then (yes, a cassette tape!) and redigitized it. After some digging, it appears this recording was made between 1987 and 1994 when his radio and tv shows overlapped. This witching hour call-in segment was called Open Phone America. According to Wikipedia, the phones would open up at 3 a.m. for callers to discuss any topic they pleased with Larry. Give it a good listen. Really picks up halfway through. Update: Transcript below! More »

what we need more of is science

Scientist: You Can't Get Drunk On Beer

A Yale professor of physiology has scientifically proven that's impossible to get drunk on beer. It's true! The numbers don't lie! So drink away, citizens—at work, at home, at breakfast, anytime! Of course, there's a catch: this scientician decided this in 1955, when things were simultaneously much more uptight and also sooo much cooler. More »

breaking

Drunk Mogul Loses Wedding Ring

This is the single most important story of this terrible summer Friday. RUPERT MURDOCH LOST HIS WEDDING RING. Seriously! He got drunk (Australians!) at a lodge bar in Sun Valley (where this week's mogul summit is being held) last night, and after all the other moguls went back to their rooms, Murdoch hung around the lobby looking for his ring. "So began a frantic 15-minute scramble among reporters hungry to please the mogul," Reuters reports. But alas, it's still missing. Idaho readers: find it and, uh... send it to us so we can give it back to him. [SiliconAlleyInsider]

advertising

Belgians Coming To Take Away Your Pretty Horses

Listen, we know you're all excited about the news of InBev's $46 billion bid to buy Anheuser-Busch. But have you considered the possible side effect? Fewer beer ads! A-B spends half a billion dollars a year on commercials, and another $300 million on sports sponsorships. But InBev—the maker of fey non-American beers like Stella Artois—is run by Belgian cheapskates who do comparatively little advertising at all. Watch out, Budweiser Clydesdales, Spuds MacKienzie, and American sportsmanship: foreigners are coming to destroy you! More »