Gawker: alexis swerdloff

Multi-ethnic-est Couple And Other Awards

internalexis — Mon, 21 Jan 2008 13:22:34 EST

Alexis Swerdloff hands out awards to the couples who celebrated their nuptials with a write-up this weekend in the New York Times.

1. Multi-ethnic-est couple: Rupa Krishnamurthy and Jeffery Wong, who took part in both a Brahmin ceremony and a traditional Presbyterian ceremony. As Rupa's mother put it, so began the marriage of a "fourth-generation Protestant Chinese and a first-generation Hindu from North Carolina."

2. Best use of Lion King tickets: Eve Thompson and Richard Robinson — we're just going to let the write-up speak for itself:

Ms. Thompson purchased "Lion King" tickets for them and during dinner conversation, she told him that she had been thinking of joining the Brahma Kumaris, who advocate avoidance of meat, alcohol, materialism and sex. Mr. Robinson, 56, a Buddhist, admired her spirituality, but, "I said to myself, 'Oh boy, I have a real challenge here.' " The next morning, as she spoke to her mother on the phone, she mentioned that she paid $250 a ticket for the show. Ms. Thompson recalled her mother's response: "I hope you slept with him, at least." "He made his move," Eve Thompson recalled, "and, to answer my mother's question: I did."

3. Winner of the Trompe l'oeil award: Luke Jernagan may look like an Other Music employee, but he's actually a priest assistant at Christ Church in Bronxville!

4. Most important dad: Jessica Adelman's father Kenneth L. Adelman was from 1981 to 1983 the deputy United States ambassador to the UN, and from 1983 to 1987, director of arms control and disarmament under President Ronald Regan. He is currently the exec director of the Arts and Ideas Series of seminars at the Aspen Institute and the senior vice president of Movers & Shakespeares, an executive coaching and training consultancy that uses Shakespeare's works as inspirational leadership tools.

5. Couple we'd most like to kick it with: Lisa Jane Persky and Andrew Zax. Let us count the ways! First off, Ms. Persky played Alice, one of Sally (Meg Ryan's) friends in When Harry Met Sally, and got to take part in this little bit of banter: Sally: What are you saying? I should get married to someone right away in case he's about to die? Alice: At least you could say you were married. Second, Andrew Zax is a music producer who specializes in archival and historical recordings including Talking Heads' "Once in a Lifetime." He was also a cast-member on the short-lived "Beat the Geeks." Third, in their early email correspondence, Ms. Persky said, "I learned that we both had a love of words… there was a lot of punning." And, finally, the couple's pragmatic view of marriage marriage: "Then, in the summer of 2004, we bought a house together and moved in," Mr. Zax said. "And once real estate became involved, it seemed the right thing to do to formalize the relationship."

6. Couple that could probably finagle for us an introduction to Sarah Jessica Parker: It was between Daniel Browne, whose father Larry Browne is the executive editor of Star magazine and Howard Schacter, the chief partnership officer at Steve and Barry's. While Browne could probably force SJP to meet with us in exchange for not publishing photos of little James Wilkie, Howard Schacter oversees partnerships for Steve and Barry's celebrity brands, which includes Sarah Jessica Parker's line Bitten. As we all know, "fashion is not a luxury, it's a right," hence, we're going to go with Howard Schacter!

Olivia Cowley & Julian Wassenaar Are Scion-tologists

aswerdloff — Mon, 04 Jun 2007 15:49:36 EDT

Each week, Intern Alexis tallies up the status indicators of all the couples who've found it necessary to shove their connubial bliss in our faces via the Times Weddings & Celebrations section, so that we can feel superior to them in some small way that we can trick ourselves into thinking is more valuable than material wealth.

Even though we had a great-great-grandchild of William H. Taft repeat this week, it was still banker-on-banker dream couple Olivia Cowley and Julian Wassenaar who came out on top. This essentially perfect couple both received MBAs from Penn, but it was Olivia's super-swank Newport and tobacco connections that sealed the deal.

Olivia Cowley and Julian Wassenaar: 21

They were married by an Episcopal priest: +1

Both received M.B.As from UPenn: +4

Julian also received a master's in IR: +1

Both I-bankers: +5

Olivia graduated Magna Cum Laude from Harvard: +4

Her mother "offers etiquette advice through the Web site newportmanners.com": +1

Olivia's paternal grandfather was the late Malcolm Cowley, literary critic: +2

Her maternal grandparents were founders of the Newport Jazz Festival: +1

She is also a descendant of Pierre Lorillard, who founded the P. Lorillard Tobacco Company in 1760: +2

Julia Taft and Christof Putzel: 11 points

Julia Taft is keeping her name: -1

But... she is the great-granddaughter of the late Robert A. Taft, Republican senator from Ohio, a great-great-granddaughter of President William H. Taft AND a cousin of Altarcations winner Nathan Taft!: +6

She received a nursing degree from NYU: +1

From 2001-2005, Julia's father was the legal advisor to Secretary of State Colin Powell, and from 1989-1992, the bride's father was the U.S. permanent representative to NATO: +2

Her mother was the assistant secretary of state for population, refugees and migration in Washington from 1997-1001: +1

Christof's mother wrote a biography of Madeline Albright and was a Moscow correspondent for Time: +1

Christof's father was the Moscow bureau chief for the Associated Press: +1

Colette Reiner and Gibson Verkuil: 11 points

Bride and groom received law degrees from Cardozo: +2

Both are corporate lawyers: +5

Gibson's father was the president of William and Mary from 1985-1992: +1

Gibson's mother is on the board of the Virginia Museum of Fine Arts: +1

Gibson's stepmother was the president of the Rockefeller Foundation and the president of UPenn: +2

Our patented rating system:

Investment banker: +2
Both Investment bankers: +5
Job involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +1
Both have jobs involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +3
Management Consultant: +2
Both management consultants: +5
Trader: +2
Both traders: +5
Corporate lawyer: +2
Both corporate lawyers: +5
Works for Defense Department: +2
Doctor: +2
Both doctors: +5
Teacher at a New York City or Connecticut private school: 2
Parents from New York City or wealthy suburb in Connecticut: 1
New York Times employee: +1
State Department employee: +2
Bride is an elementary school teacher: +1
Works in media: +1
Ivy league graduate: +1 *
Both ivy league graduates: +3
Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: +2*
Both Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: +5*
For each subsequent degree after a B.A.: +1
Ivy league B.A. with graduate degree at low-ranking local
college/university: -1
If bride or groom attended/teach at any school with "Country Day" in
the name: +2
Coro fellow at NYU Law: +1
Has MFA in creative writing from University of Iowa: +1
Graduated Cum Laude: +1
Graduated Magna Cum Laude: +2
Graduated Summa Cum Laude: +3
Fulbright fellow: +2
Rhodes scholar: +3
Couple met online: -1
Couple met at art opening: 2
Couple met at art opening for husband's/wife's show: +3
Woman is at ideal age for getting married (25): 1
Man is at ideal age for getting married (27): 1
For each member of couple over 35: -1
Couple married by a Cantor: +1
Couple met during or before their freshman year in college: +2
Bride or groom goes by middle name: +1
Mother a nursery school/kindergarten teacher or reading
specialist/father is a wealthy professional: +3
If the groom is Jewish and the bride Asian: +2
If the groom is Asian and the bride is Jewish: -1
Bride and groom share a last name before getting married: +2
The bride/bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce: -2
Descendant/related to somebody famous: +3
Descendant of a President: +5
Descendant of a founding father: +5
Groom wearing gingham in picture: +1
Parent is a trustee or board member of a company or organization: +1
per company/org
Parent is a member of the Bermuda parliament: +2
Bride or Groom is a board member of a company or organization: +1 per
company/org
Bride "is keeping her name", "will continue to use her name professionally": -1
If there is a Jr., II, III or IV in a name: +2
If there is a "von" in a last name: +2
Couple featured in "Vows" column: +2
Bride or groom's first name is a made-up preppy name: +3
If someone famous comes to the wedding and is mentioned: +2
If wedding ceremony held at Bethesda by the Sea in Palm Beach, and/or
reception under a tent at the bride's grandmother's house in P.B: +2
Bride clearly quits her job after the wedding: +1
Married by an Episcopal priest: +1
Groom is 15-30 years older than bride: +3
Bride and groom both from New Jersey: -2
Partner in corporate law firm: +3
Bridge teaches elementary school, groom in finance: +2
Bride works for auction house, groom in finance: +2
Bride/groom works for company founded by parents: +2
Bride/groom related to a socialite: +2
Bride/groom's father/mother works for a company bearing his/her last name: +2
Bride and groom's father/mother share a first name, plus initial: +4

*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

Mazel Tov, Cathy Chavkin and Daniel Schmerin!

aswerdloff — Mon, 21 May 2007 16:25:37 EDT

We tried as hard as we could to make Emily Larned and Christian Ruggiero the winning couple this week (we loved their Wesleyan-Brown artist and MTV-theme-song producing ways... they seemed straight out of The Emperor's Children by Claire Messud which we are currently reading, [Emily: It's so good, right?] but, alas, they really couldn't compete with Cathy Chavkin and Daniel Schmerin, who were all Penn magna cum laudey out the ass.

Cathy Chavkin and Daniel Schmerin: 19 points

Daniel's parents are "of New York": +1

Couple met during freshman year of college: +2

Both graduated magna cum laude from UPenn: +7

Cathy received a master's in contemporary art from Sotheby's Institute of Art: +1

Cathy's father is a partner in a law firm; mother is a nursery school teacher: +3

Daniel works at the State Department: +2

Daniel received two master's degrees: +2

Daniel's mother is the vice chairwoman of the board of trustees of the American Friends of Tel Aviv Museum of Art: +1

Monica Ferguson and Cameron Murphy: 16 points

Monica's family is from Greenwich; Cameron's from New Canaan: +2

Monica received an M.B.A from Columbia: +2

Monica is an i-banker; Cameron works at a hedge fund: +5

Both Monica and Cameron's fathers work for companies bearing their last names: John J. Ferguson is a senior partner at Ferguson, Aufsesser, Hallowell & Wrynn and John J. Murphy is the founder and senior principal of Murphy Capital Management: +4

Monica and Cameron's father share the same first name, plus initial: +3

Elizabeth Angell and Victor Brand: 14 points

Elizabeth Angell's parents are "of New York": +1

The bride is keeping her name: -1

She's a senior editor at Allure: +1

She graduated magna cum laude from Harvard: +4

She has a master's ~~in American history and literature~~ from Columbia: +2
(The bride writes: "I have an MFA in creative writing from Columbia, not a masters in history. This mistake belongs to the New York Times, not you, and while I sometimes wonder if I should have bought myself a masters in something like history, I must live with my decision to invest in an MFA.")

The bride's parents are members of the board of the Robert Packard Center for ALS Research at Johns Hopkins University: +1

Mrs. Angell is the vice chairman of the board of WNYC: +1

Mr. Angell is on the board of the Henry Street Settlement: +1

Mr. Brand is a freelance writer and researcher who specializes in art: +1

He graduated cum laude from Davidson: +1

He received a master's in creative writing from Columbia: +2

Emily Larned, Christian Ruggiero: 14 points

Both have parents from CT suburbs: +2

Bride is keeping her name: -1

Emily is working toward a Master in Fine Arts in graphic design at Yale: +3

Emily's "father is the chairman of the Brooklyn Improvement Company, founded in 1866 by Edwin C. Litchfield, the bride's maternal great-great-great grandfather, to create the Gowanus Canal": +3

Emily's art has been collected by more than 60 universities, libraries and museums: +1

Christian graduated from Brown: +1

He "has also composed and produced the theme music for several MTV shows": +2

Our patented rating system:

*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

Eliza Harrington & Minor Myers III Seem Very Nice

aswerdloff — Mon, 14 May 2007 17:18:24 EDT

As noted philosopher Carrie Bradshaw once put it, the New York Times wedding announcements are "the straight woman's sports pages." Altarcations is all about scoring the game. Each week, we evaluate the latest newlyweds, based on an elaborate rating system, described below.

With a name like Minor Myers III, you best believe you'll be making an appearance right here. MMIII (pictured!) and his lady Eliza Harrington came out on top this week, racking up a total of 17 points. They're all up in the Society of Cincinnati, an association of descendants of the officers in the American Revolutionary War, and as you know, there is nothing that makes us weaker in the knees than descendants of the officers in the American Revolutionary War. Word.

Eliza Harrington and Minor Myers III: 17 points

Minor's name is "Minor": +1
Minor is a "III": +2
Minor's parents are from Mystic, CT: +1
They were married at Anderson House, the home of the Society of Cincinnati, an association of the descendants of the officers in the American Revolutionary War, of which the bridegroom is a member: +2
Minor's father wrote two books about the Society of Cincinnati: +1
Eliza is a doctor: +2
Eliza graduated from Harvard: +2
Eliza's father is on the board of trustees at Sibley Memorial Hospital: +1
Minor was a corporate lawyer and is to be a visiting professor at Brooklyn Law School: +2
Minor received a law degree from Yale: +3
Jennifer Merzon and Christopher Evans: 15 points
Both received law degrees from Duke: +2
Christopher graduated from Duke magna cum laude: +2
Both are lawyers: +5
Jennifer graduated from Dartmouth: +1
Christopher graduated summa cum laude from Bowdoin: +3
Christopher is on the board of the League Treatment Center: +1
His parents are from Manhattan: +1
Megan Lynch and Todd Johnson: 11 points
Todd's parents are from New York: +1
Megan was an I-banker at Gerson Lehrman "until last month": +3 (for clearly quitting her job right before the wedding)
Todd is a consultant at Bain: +2
Todd has an M.B.A from Dartmouth: +2
And a MA in public health from Harvard: +3

Our patented rating system:
Investment banker: +2
Both Investment bankers: +5
Job involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +1
Both have jobs involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +3
Management Consultant: +2
Both management consultants: +5
Trader: +2
Both traders: +5
Corporate lawyer: +2
Both corporate lawyers: +5
Works for Defense Department: +2
Doctor: +2
Both doctors: +5
Teacher at a New York City or Connecticut private school: 2
Parents from New York City or wealthy suburb in Connecticut: 1
New York Times employee: +1
State Department employee: +2
Bride is an elementary school teacher: +1
Works in media: +1
Ivy league graduate: +1 *
Both ivy league graduates: +3
Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: +2*
Both Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: +5*
For each subsequent degree after a B.A.: +1
Ivy league B.A. with graduate degree at low-ranking local
college/university: -1
If bride or groom attended/teach at any school with "Country Day" in
the name: +2
Coro fellow at NYU Law: +1
Has MFA in creative writing from University of Iowa: +1
Graduated Cum Laude: +1
Graduated Magna Cum Laude: +2
Graduated Summa Cum Laude: +3
Fulbright fellow: +2
Rhodes scholar: +3
Couple met online: -1
Couple met at art opening: 2
Couple met at art opening for husband's/wife's show: +3
Woman is at ideal age for getting married (25): 1
Man is at ideal age for getting married (27): 1
For each member of couple over 35: -1
Couple married by a Cantor: +1
Couple met during or before their freshman year in college: +2
Bride or groom goes by middle name: +1
Mother a nursery school/kindergarten teacher or reading
specialist/father is a wealthy professional: +3
If the groom is Jewish and the bride Asian: +2
If the groom is Asian and the bride is Jewish: -1
Bride and groom share a last name before getting married: +2
The bride/bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce: -2
Descendant/related to somebody famous: +3
Descendant of a President: +5
Descendant of a founding father: +5
Groom wearing gingham in picture: +1
Parent is a trustee or board member of a company or organization: +1
per company/org
Parent is a member of the Bermuda parliament: +2
Bride or Groom is a board member of a company or organization: +1 per
company/org
Bride "is keeping her name", "will continue to use her name professionally": -1
If there is a Jr., II, III or IV in a name: +2
If there is a "von" in a last name: +2
Couple featured in "Vows" column: +2
Bride or groom's first name is a made-up preppy name: +3
If someone famous comes to the wedding and is mentioned: +2
If wedding ceremony held at Bethesda by the Sea in Palm Beach, and/or
reception under a tent at the bride's grandmother's house in P.B: +2
Bride clearly quits her job after the wedding: +1
Married by an Episcopal priest: +1
Groom is 15-30 years older than bride: +3
Bride and groom both from New Jersey: -2
Partner in corporate law firm: +3
Bridge teaches elementary school, groom in finance: +2
Bride works for auction house, groom in finance: +2
Bride/groom works for company founded by parents: +2
Bride/groom related to a socialite: +2
*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

[Image via]

Soogy Lee & Nathan Taft Are Old But Pedigreed

aswerdloff — Mon, 07 May 2007 16:55:33 EDT

Finally, after doing this for a few months, we've gotten our first great-great-grandson of a President! Yay, Nathan Taft! Not only is he William Howard Taft's great-great-grandson, but he's got two Yale degrees, works in real estate investment and is marrying a corporate lawyer whose own maternal grandmother was something of a big deal—the vice premier of South Vietnam in 1965. Look how far we've come, people! However, somehow, it was still a rather close one this week. William Howard Taft can only take you so far when your bride is 38.

Soogy Lee & Nathan Taft: 16 points

Soogy is over 35: -1

Soogy is a corporate lawyer at Simpson Thacher & Bartlett: +2

Soogy received a law degree from Georgetown: +1

The bride's maternal grandmother, the late Tran Van Tuyen, was a vice premier of South Vietnam in 1965: +3

Nathan works in real estate investment: +1

Nathan received a B.A. from Yale: +2

Nathan received an M.B.A. from Yale: +3

Bridegroom is a great-great-grandson of President William Howard Taft: +5

Helena Yu, Anthony Yu: 15 points
Couple shares a last name: +2
Both graduated from Cornell: +3
Helena graduated magna cum laude: +2
Anthony graduated summa cum laude: +3
Helena completing medical degree at U Mich: +1
Anthony completing medical degree at Harvard: +3
Helena at ideal female age for getting married: +1
Eve Brensike & Richard Primus: 15 points
Eve graduated from Brown: +1
Eve graduated summa cum laude from U Mich law school: +4
Richard graduated summa cum laude from Harvard: +5
Richard received a law degree from Yale: +2
Richard was a Rhodes scholar: +3
Richard was a clerk for Ruth Bader Ginsburg: +1
Richard is over 35: -1
Our patented rating system:

Investment banker: +2
Both Investment bankers: +5
Job involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +1
Both have jobs involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +3
Management Consultant: +1
Both management consultants: +3
Trader: +2
Both traders: +5
Corporate lawyer: +2
Both corporate lawyers: +5
Works for Defense Department: +2
Doctor: +2
Both doctors: +5
Teacher at a New York City or Connecticut private school: 2
Parents from New York City or wealthy suburb in Connecticut: 1
New York Times employee: +1
State Department employee: +2
Bride is an elementary school teacher: +1
Works in media: +1
Ivy league graduate: +1 *
Both ivy league graduates: +3
Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: +2*
Both Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: +5*
For each subsequent degree after a B.A.: +1
Ivy league B.A. with graduate degree at low-ranking local
college/university: -1
If bride or groom attended/teach at any school with "Country Day" in
the name: +2
Coro fellow at NYU Law: +1
Has MFA in creative writing from University of Iowa: +1
Graduated Cum Laude: +1
Graduated Magna Cum Laude: +2
Graduated Summa Cum Laude: +3
Fulbright fellow: +2
Rhodes scholar: +3
Couple met online: -1
Couple met at art opening: 2
Couple met at art opening for husband's/wife's show: +3
Woman is at ideal age for getting married (25): 1
Man is at ideal age for getting married (27): 1
For each member of couple over 35: -1
Couple married by a Cantor: +1
Couple met during or before their freshman year in college: +2
Bride or groom goes by middle name: +1
Mother a nursery school/kindergarten teacher or reading
specialist/father is a wealthy professional: +3
If the groom is Jewish and the bride Asian: +2
If the groom is Asian and the bride is Jewish: -1
Bride and groom share a last name before getting married: +2
The bride/bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce: -2
Descendant/related to somebody famous: +3
Descendant of a President: +5
Descendant of a founding father: +5
Groom wearing gingham in picture: +1
Parent is a trustee or board member of a company or organization: +1
per company/org
Parent is a member of the Bermuda parliament: +2
Bride or Groom is a board member of a company or organization: +1 per
company/org
Bride "is keeping her name", "will continue to use her name professionally": -1
If there is a Jr., II, III or IV in a name: +2
If there is a "von" in a last name: +2
Couple featured in "Vows" column: +2
Bride or groom's first name is a made-up preppy name: +3
If someone famous comes to the wedding and is mentioned: +2
If wedding ceremony held at Bethesda by the Sea in Palm Beach, and/or
reception under a tent at the bride's grandmother's house in P.B: +2
Bride clearly quits her job after the wedding: +1
Married by an Episcopal priest: +1
Groom is 15-30 years older than bride: +3
Bride and groom both from New Jersey: -2
Partner in corporate law firm: +3
Bridge teaches elementary school, groom in finance: +2
Bride works for auction house, groom in finance: +2
Bride/groom works for company founded by parents: +2
Bride/groom related to a socialite: +2
*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

Model Yourselves On Sara Galvan & Luke Bronin

aswerdloff — Mon, 30 Apr 2007 15:52:28 EDT

We tend to be less than impressed with the couples featured in the main Styles "Vows" story. The bride's usually an ex-Rockette and the groom's like a blind rabbi or something. This week's column was an aberration! Sara Galvin and Luke Bronin are basically perfect. Rhodes Scholars who went on to attend Yale Law School, their courtship included boat-rides down the Thames, croquet games, and a road-trip in which they spoke of their dreams of contributing to society in a meaningful way. But it rained at their wedding. Ha! What's more, they went toe to toe in rough competition with a sterling crowd!

Sara Galvan, Luke Bronin: 23 big points!

Couple featured in "Vows" section: +2
Sara and Luke were both Rhodes Scholars: +6
"I spoke to her of my dreams of changing American cities through urban design," said Ms. Galvan, who trained as an architect at the University of Texas. "He spoke of his dream of contributing to society through policy work and politics.": +3
"They began dating in earnest in March of their second year, traveling down the Thames in flat-bottomed boats, playing croquet and traveling to South Africa, Eastern Europe and the Balkans.": +3
Luke graduated from Yale: +2
Both received law degrees from Yale: +7
Married by an Episcopal priest: +1
Rained at wedding: -1
Emily Thacher-Renshaw, Christian Pistilli: 17 points
Couple both graduated from Harvard Law School: +7 (5 for both going to Harvard, 1 each for graduate degree)
Emily graduated cum laude from HLS: +1
Christian graduated magna cum laude from HLS: +2
Emily graduated magna cum laude from Penn: +3
Christian graduated summa cum laude from Haverford: +3
Married by an Episcopal priest: +1
Juliet Sorce, David Weber: 12 points
Juliet's parents are "of Manhattan": +1
Couple met at Yale during their freshman year: +7 (5 for both attending Yale, 2 for meeting during freshman year)
Couple got married at the Yale Club: +2
Juliet received a MA in Italian language and culture from Middlebury: +1
David owns Rickshaw Dumpling Bar: +1
Mimi van Wyck, Ham Morrison: 12 points
Mimi van Wyck is the brother of socialite, event planner Bronson van Wyck: +2
Ham's name is Ham: +2
He's a III: +2
His mother is named Kiwi: +2
Mimi is a partner in Van Wyck & Van Wyck, a company founded by her mother and brother: +2
Ham is a real estate investor and also races stock cars: +2
Our patented rating system:

Investment banker: +2
Both Investment bankers: +5
Job involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +1
Both have jobs involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +3
Management Consultant: +1
Both management consultants: +3
Trader: +2
Both traders: +5
Corporate lawyer: +2
Both corporate lawyers: +5
Works for Defense Department: +2
Doctor: +2
Both doctors: +5
Teacher at a New York City or Connecticut private school: 2
Parents from New York City or wealthy suburb in Connecticut: 1
New York Times employee: +1
State Department employee: +2
Bride is an elementary school teacher: +1
Works in media: +1
Ivy league graduate: +1 *
Both ivy league graduates: +3
Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: +2*
Both Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: +5*
For each subsequent degree after a B.A.: +1
Ivy league B.A. with graduate degree at low-ranking local
college/university: -1
If bride or groom attended/teach at any school with "Country Day" in
the name: +2
Coro fellow at NYU Law: +1
Has MFA in creative writing from University of Iowa: +1
Graduated Cum Laude: +1
Graduated Magna Cum Laude: +2
Graduated Summa Cum Laude: +3
Fulbright fellow: +2
Rhodes scholar: +3
Couple met online: -1
Couple met at art opening: 2
Couple met at art opening for husband's/wife's show: +3
Woman is at ideal age for getting married (25): 1
Man is at ideal age for getting married (27): 1
For each member of couple over 35: -1
Couple married by a Cantor: +1
Couple met during or before their freshman year in college: +2
Bride or groom goes by middle name: +1
Mother a nursery school/kindergarten teacher or reading
specialist/father is a wealthy professional= +3
If the groom is Jewish and the bride Asian: +2
If the groom is Asian and the bride is Jewish: -1
The bride/bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce: -2
Descendant/related to somebody famous: +3
Descendant of a founding father: +4
Groom wearing gingham in picture: +1
Parent is a trustee or board member of a company or organization: +1
per company/org
Parent is a member of the Bermuda parliament: +2
Bride or Groom is a board member of a company or organization: +1 per
company/org
Bride "is keeping her name", "will continue to use her name professionally": -1
If there is a Jr., II, III or IV in a name: +2
If there is a "von" in a last name: +2
Couple featured in "Vows" column: +2
Bride or groom's first name is a made-up preppy name: +3
If someone famous comes to the wedding and is mentioned: +2
If wedding ceremony held at Bethesda by the Sea in Palm Beach, and/or
reception under a tent at the bride's grandmother's house in P.B: +2
Bride clearly quits her job after the wedding: +1
Married by an Episcopal priest: +1
Groom is 15-30 years older than bride: +3
Bride and groom both from New Jersey: -2
Partner in corporate law firm: +3
Bridge teaches elementary school, groom in finance: +2
Bride works for auction house, groom in finance: +2
Bride/groom works for company founded by parents: +2
Bride/groom related to a socialite: +2
*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

Altarcations: Salima Vahabzadeh & Paul Sheppard

aswerdloff — Mon, 23 Apr 2007 16:45:46 EDT

Our hearts flitter-fluttered and our loins were tickled when we read that "Salima Vahabzadeh and Paul Kenneth Sheppard, who are vice presidents at investment banking firms in New York, were married here yesterday." There is little that makes our Sundays more fulfilling than to hear of an i-banker on i-banker union. Not only are the Vahabzadeh-Sheppards both vice presidents of investment banking firms, but Cambridge-grad Paul also earned a Fulbright! Go, Paul, go! Even Barclay Cunningham and Joseph Whitten's WASPy names and famousish forebears couldn't trump Paul and Salima's overachievements!

Salima Vahabzadeh and Paul Sheppard: 16 points

Both vice presidents of i-banking firms in New York: +5

Salima attended Cornell for undergrad: +1

Both received M.B.As from U. Penn: +5

Paul was a Fulbright fellow: +2

Salima is from New York: +1

Paul graduated from Cambridge: +2

Barclay Cunningham and Joseph Whitten: 13 points

Barclay's name is Barclay: +2

Barclay is the descendant of Pierre Laclede, a founder of St. Louis: +3

Joseph over 35: -1

Joseph is a doctor: +2

Joseph has a MA in biomedical sciences and a medical degree: +2

Joseph is the grandson of the late Jamie Whitten, the longest-serving member of the House of Representatives (1941-1995): +3

Both descendants of someone famous: +2

Jenny Huang and Roger Hong: 13 points

Jenny and Roger both graduated magna cum laude from Harvard: +9

Jenny graduated magna cum laude from NYU law: +2

Robert is getting his medical degree from Cornell: +2

Our patented rating system:

Investment banker: 2
Both Investment bankers: 5
Job involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +1
Both have jobs involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +3
Management Consultant: 1
Both management consultants: 3
Trader: 2
Both traders: 5
High-powered lawyer: 2
Both high-powered lawyers: 5
Works for Defense Department: +2
Doctor: +2
Both doctors: +5
Teacher at a New York City or Connecticut private school: 2
Parents from New York City or wealthy suburb in Connecticut: 1
New York Times employee: +1
State Department employee: +2
Bride is an elementary school teacher: +1
Works in media: +1
Ivy league graduate: +1 *
Both ivy league graduates: +3
Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: +2*
Both Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: +5*
For each subsequent degree after a B.A.: +1
Ivy league B.A. with graduate degree at low-ranking local
college/university: -1
If bride or groom attended/teach at any school with "Country Day" in
the name: +2
Coro fellow at NYU Law: +1
Has MFA in creative writing from University of Iowa: +1
Graduated Cum Laude: +1
Graduated Magna Cum Laude: +2
Graduated Summa Cum Laude: +3
Fulbright fellow: +2
Rhodes scholar: +3
Couple met online: -1
Couple met at art opening: 2
Couple met at art opening for husband's/wife's show: +3
Woman is at ideal age for getting married (25): 1
Man is at ideal age for getting married (27): 1
For each member of couple over 35: -1
Couple married by a Cantor: +1
Couple met during or before their freshman year in college: +2
Bride or groom goes by middle name: +1
Mother a nursery school/kindergarten teacher or reading
specialist/father is a wealthy professional= +3
If the groom is Jewish and the bride Asian: +2
If the groom is Asian and the bride is Jewish: -1
The bride/bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce: -2
Descendant/related to somebody famous: +3
Descendant of a founding father: +4
Groom wearing gingham in picture: +1
Parent is a trustee or board member of a company or organization: +1
per company/org
Parent is a member of the Bermuda parliament: +2
Bride or Groom is a board member of a company or organization: +1 per
company/org
Bride "is keeping her name", "will continue to use her name professionally": -1
If there is a Jr., II, III or IV in a name: +2
If there is a "von" in a last name: +2
Bride or groom's first name is a made-up preppy name: +3
If someone famous comes to the wedding and is mentioned: +2
If wedding ceremony held at Bethesda by the Sea in Palm Beach, and/or
reception under a tent at the bride's grandmother's house in P.B: +2
Bride clearly quits her job after the wedding: +1
Married by an Episcopal priest: +1
Groom is 15-30 years older than bride: +3
Bride and groom both from New Jersey: -2
Partner in corporate law firm: +3
Bridge teaches elementary school, groom in finance: +2
Bride works for auction house, groom in finance: +2

*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

Altarcations: Victoria Potterton + Austin Zalkin

aswerdloff — Mon, 16 Apr 2007 15:56:00 EDT

To be honest, we were really rooting for Francine Whitney and Fernando Banhara. The widow of the Whitney heir and her sailing instructor. How deliciously scandalous! How very F. Scott Fitzgerald-y! But, alas, aside from the juicy-factor, they weren't able to rack up the extra points needed to topple Victoria Potterton and Austin Zalkin, both Dartmouth grads with impressive resumes. There were also some other close contenders, who we decided to include, well, just cuz.

Victoria Potterton, Austin Zalkin: 13 points

Both went to Dartmouth: +3

Victoria graduated magna cum laude: +2

Austin graduated cum laude: +1

Victoria is graduating from Yale with a combined medical and MBA degree: +4

Austin is "ideal" man-age: +1

He's an i-banker: +2

Anne Robinson, Kevin Moriarty: 12 points

Anne is keeping her name: -1

Both of them are high-powered lawyers: +5

Anne received her law degree from Harvard: +3

She was the EIC of the journal Law & Gender: +1

Kevin graduated from Princeton: +2

Kev has a law degree from NYU: +1

He was the EIC of the law school's newspaper: +1

Francine Whitney, Fernando Banhara: 11 points

Both over 35: -2

Francine has an MA in screenwriting and directing from Columbia: +2

Bride keeping her name: -1

But the name is Whitney, as she is the widow of Gifford Whitney, great-grandson of Gertrude Vanderbilt Whitney: +6

Couple met when Francine was "settling the estate of her first husband" and encountered Fernando at Consolidated Yachts in City Island, where her late husband "had a financial interest and had kept a number of boats and dirt bikes." They became friends when Fernando began teaching Francine "basic boating skills so she could take her son Harry Payne Whitney III out on Long Island sound": +6

Christina Harris, Caleb DesRosiers: 9 points

Christina is a doctor: +2

Christina received a medical degree from Harvard: +3

Caleb on the board of two non-profits: +2

Has a MA and a law degree: +2

Kimberly Young, Stefano Rivella: 9 points

Stefano is 14 years older than Kimberly: +2

Kimberly is keeping her name: -1

She is an i-banker: +2

She graduated cum laude from GW: +1

Has an MA in economics from BU: +1

Stefano has a PhD in applied genetics from University of Pavia: +1

Couple met after exchanging meaningful glances during a tango dance called the milonga: +3

Our patented rating system:

Investment banker: 2
Both Investment bankers: 5
Job involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +1
Both have jobs involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +3
Management Consultant: 1
Both management consultants: 3
Trader: 2
Both traders: 5
High-powered lawyer: 2
Both high-powered lawyers: 5
Works for Defense Department: +2
Doctor: +2
Both doctors: +5
Teacher at a New York City or Connecticut private school: 2
Parents from New York City or wealthy suburb in Connecticut: 1
New York Times employee: +1
State Department employee: +2
Bride is an elementary school teacher: +1
Works in media: +1
Ivy league graduate: +1 *
Both ivy league graduates: +3
Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: +2*
Both Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: +5*
For each subsequent degree after a B.A.: +1
Ivy league B.A. with graduate degree at low-ranking local
college/university: -1
If bride or groom attended/teach at any school with "Country Day" in
the name: +2
Coro fellow at NYU Law: +1
Has MFA in creative writing from University of Iowa: +1
Graduated Cum Laude: +1
Graduated Magna Cum Laude: +2
Graduated Summa Cum Laude: +3
Couple met online: -1
Couple met at art opening: 2
Couple met at art opening for husband's/wife's show: +3
Woman is at ideal age for getting married (25): 1
Man is at ideal age for getting married (27): 1
For each member of couple over 35: -1
Couple married by a Cantor: +1
Couple met during or before their freshman year in college: +2
Bride or groom goes by middle name: +1
Mother a nursery school/kindergarten teacher or reading
specialist/father is a wealthy professional= +3
If the groom is Jewish and the bride Asian: +2
If the groom is Asian and the bride is Jewish: -1
The bride/bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce: -2
Descendant/related to somebody famous: +3
Descendant of a founding father: +4
Groom wearing gingham in picture: +1
Parent is a trustee or board member of a company or organization: +1
per company/org
Parent is a member of the Bermuda parliament: +2
Bride or Groom is a board member of a company or organization: +1 per
company/org
Bride "is keeping her name", "will continue to use her name professionally": -1
If there is a Jr., II, III or IV in a name: +2
If there is a "von" in a last name: +2
Bride or groom's first name is a made-up preppy name: +3
If someone famous comes to the wedding and is mentioned: +2
If wedding ceremony held at Bethesda by the Sea in Palm Beach, and/or
reception under a tent at the bride's grandmother's house in P.B: +2
Bride clearly quits her job after the wedding: +1
Married by an Episcopal priest: +1
Groom is 15-30 years older than bride: +3
Bride and groom both from New Jersey: -2
Partner in corporate law firm: +3
Bridge teaches elementary school, groom in finance: +2
Bride works for auction house, groom in finance: +2

*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

Altarcations: Rachel Leifer & Joshua Norman

aswerdloff — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 14:23:31 EDT

It was the battle of the famous versus the non-famous people, and this time around, the non-famouses won! Though it was a close one. "Tara Smith, an author, and Thomas Struth, the photographer" (join the debate over the Times's curious "an" vs. "the" decisions here!) had, yes, fame on their side, but the fact that they were both over 35 cost them some crucial points. Rachel Leifer and Joshua Newman, both reporters for undoubtedly Times-feeding Mississippi papers came out on top. They've got a ton of degrees from Columbia, and Rachel is the granddaughter of Sammy Cahn, who gave the world "Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow" and "Love and Marriage."

Rachel Leifer & Joshua Norman: 11 points

Both reporters for Mississippi newspapers: +2
Rachel has two Masters degrees; one in secondary education from
Columbia and one in journalism from Columbia: +4
Rachel is the granddaugher of Sammy Cahn, a lyricist who won four Academy Awards: +3
Masters in journalism from Columbia: +2
Tara Smith & Thomas Struth: 10 points
Both over 35: -2
Tara graduated from Dartmouth: +1
Tara received an MFA in nonfiction writing from Columbia: +2
Tara wrote West of Then, which we have heard of: +3
Thomas Struth is photographer who had a career retrospective at the
Metropolitan Museum of Art. And we have heard of him: +3
Couple met at Thomas's art opening at Marian Goodman: +3
Our patented rating system:

Investment banker: 2
Both Investment bankers: 5
Job involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +1
Both have jobs involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +3
Management Consultant: 1
Both management consultants: 3
Trader: 2
Both traders: 5
High-powered lawyer: 2
Both high-powered lawyers: 5
Works for Defense Department: +2
Teacher at a New York City or Connecticut private school: 2
Parents from New York City or wealthy suburb in Connecticut: 1
New York Times employee: 1
State Department employee: 2
Bride is an elementary school teacher: 1
Works in media: 1
Ivy league graduate: 1 *
Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: 2*
Both Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: 5*
For each subsequent degree after a B.A.: 1
Ivy league B.A. with graduate degree at low-ranking local
college/university: -1
If bride or groom attended/teach at any school with "Country Day" in
the name: +2
Coro fellow at NYU Law: +1
Graduated Cum Laude: +1
Graduated Magna Cum Laude: +2
Graduated Summa Cum Laude: +3
Couple met online: -1
Couple met at art opening: 2
Couple met at art opening for husband's/wife's show: +3
Woman is at ideal age for getting married (25): 1
Man is at ideal age for getting married (27): 1
For each member of couple over 35: -1
Couple married by a Cantor: +1
Couple met during or before their freshman year in college: +2
Bride or groom goes by middle name: +1
Mother a nursery school/kindergarten teacher or reading
specialist/father is a wealthy professional= +3
If the groom is Jewish and the bride Asian: +2
If the groom is Asian and the bride is Jewish: -1
The bride/bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce: -2
Descendant/related to somebody famous: +3
Descendant of a founding father: +4
Groom wearing gingham in picture: +1
Parent is a trustee or board member of a company or organization: +1
per company/org
Parent is a member of the Bermuda parliament: +2
Bride or Groom is a board member of a company or organization: +1 per
company/org
Bride "is keeping her name", "will continue to use her name professionally": -1
If there is a Jr., II, III or IV in a name: +2
If there is a "von" in a last name: +2
If someone famous comes to the wedding and is mentioned: +2
If wedding ceremony held at Bethesda by the Sea in Palm Beach, and/or
reception under a tent at the bride's grandmother's house in P.B: +2
Bride clearly quits her job after the wedding: +1
Married by an Episcopal priest: +1
Groom is 20-30 years older than bride: +2
Bride and groom both from New Jersey: -2
Partner in corporate law firm: +3
Bridge teaches elementary school, groom in finance: +2

*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

Altarcations: Kathleen Walsh & John von Rosenberg

aswerdloff — Mon, 02 Apr 2007 14:20:57 EDT

What a squeaker! Behold the power of the old "until last month" or "until recently" to swing the Altarcations pendulum! While Jessica Liberman and Keith Wilcox's preschool meet-cute (meet-disturbing?) story was enthralling, it just didn't get them the points they needed in order to vanquish Kathleen Walsh, who has degrees from both Brown and Harvard and most likely quit her job to plan the wedding. As femiladies, we respect her empowered choice! Go team sisterhood!

Kathleen Walsh & John von Rosenberg: 11 points

Kathleen over 35: -1

John is over 35: -1

She's keeping her name: -1

"Until last month she worked on the rights of the disabled": +1

John has a "von" in his name: +2

Kathleen graduated from Brown: +1

She received a law degree from Harvard: +3

She graduated cum laude: +1

Her parents are from a wealthy suburb of CT: +1

Her father retired as the VP and general counsel at a British Utility company and her mother retired as a third-grade teacher: +3

John works for the Defense department: +2

Jessica Liberman & Keith Wilcox: 10 points

Met in pre-kindergarten at Hunter College Elementary School in Manhattan: +2

Both parents from NYC: +2

Jessica a high-powered lawyer: +2

Jessica has a BA from Penn: +1

And a law degree from Penn: +2

Keith has an M.B.A. from University of California: +1

Our patented rating system:

Investment banker: 2
Both Investment bankers: 5
Job involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +1
Both have jobs involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +3
Management Consultant: 1
Both management consultants: 3
Trader: 2
Both traders: 5
High-powered lawyer: 2
Both high-powered lawyers: 5
Works for Defense Department: +2
Teacher at a New York City or Connecticut private school: 2
Parents from New York City or wealthy suburb in Connecticut: 1
New York Times employee: 1
State Department employee: 2
Bride is an elementary school teacher: 1
Works in media: 1
Ivy league graduate: 1 *
Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: 2*
Both Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: 5*
For each subsequent degree after a B.A.: 1
Ivy league B.A. with graduate degree at low-ranking local
college/university: -1
If bride or groom attended/teach at any school with "Country Day" in
the name: +2
Coro fellow at NYU Law: +1
Graduated Cum Laude: 1
Graduated Magna Cum Laude: 2
Couple met online: -1
Graduated Summa Cum Laude: 3
Woman is at ideal age for getting married (25): 1
Man is at ideal age for getting married (27): 1
For each member of couple over 35: -1
Couple married by a Cantor: +1
Couple met during or before their freshman year in college: +2
Bride or groom goes by middle name: +1
Mother a nursery school/kindergarten teacher or reading
specialist/father is a wealthy professional= +3
If the groom is Jewish and the bride Asian: +2
If the groom is Asian and the bride is Jewish: -1
The bride/bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce: -2
Descendant/related to somebody famous: +3
Descendant of a founding father: +4
Groom wearing gingham in picture: +1
Parent is a trustee or board member of a company or organization: +1
per company/org
Parent is a member of the Bermuda parliament: +2
Bride or Groom is a board member of a company or organization: +1 per
company/org
Bride "is keeping her name", "will continue to use her name professionally": -1
If there is a Jr., II, III or IV in a name: +2
If there is a "von" in a last name: +2
If someone famous comes to the wedding and is mentioned: +2
If wedding ceremony held at Bethesda by the Sea in Palm Beach, and/or
reception under a tent at the bride's grandmother's house in P.B: +2
Bride clearly quits her job after the wedding: +1
Married by an Episcopal priest: +1
Groom is 20-30 years older than bride: +2
Bride and groom both from New Jersey: -2
Partner in corporate law firm: +3
Bridge teaches elementary school, groom in finance: +2

*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

Altarcations: Martha Flach & Austin Wilkie

aswerdloff — Mon, 26 Mar 2007 16:21:56 EDT

Spring wedding season has arrived, which means that things are beginning to seriously heat up on the ol' wedding pages. The Rothkopf-Steinbergs (Jill teaches kindergarten; Jonathan works with hedge funds) were tied with the Purohit- Abrahams (they met while undergrads at Harvard, both went on to get M.B.As from Harvard) with 13 points each, but it was the Flach-Wilkies who came out on top. Though both over 35, Austin's a partner at Holland & Knight, the couple were married by a retired state Supreme Court justice and Austin's great-great grandfather's business interests included, among other things, "diamonds in the Congo." Well, thanks to Sunday's Times cover story, we know all about those!

Martha Flach, Austin Wilkie: 14 points

Both over 35: -2
Martha has a MA in historic preservation from Columbia: +2
Officiated by a retired state Supreme Court justice: +2
Austin a partner at Holland & Knight: +3
Austin graduated from Harvard: +2
Austin has a law degree from UVA: +1
"Mr. Wilkie's great-great grandfather Thomas Fortune Ryan was a
financier and philanthropist whose business interests included
tobacco, New York City streetcars and subways and diamonds in the
Congo." +4 6

Jill Rothkopf, Jonathan Steinberg: 13 points
Jill's parents from Stamford, CT: +1
James' parents from New York: +1
Jill teaches kindergarten; James is a managing director at a research business for hedge funds and mutual funds: +2
Jill graduated cum laude from Upenn: +2
Jill has a MA from NYU: +1
James graduated magna cum laude from Princeton: +4
M.B.A. from Columbia: +2

Tara Purohit, Riad Abrahams: 13 points
Tara and Riad both graduated from Harvard: +5
Both received M.B.A.s from Harvard: 6
Tara a consultant: +1
Riad developing an investment firm: +1
Guide to Alexis' Patented Rating System—once again updated with your brilliant suggestions!
Investment banker: 2
Both Investment bankers: 5
Job involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +1
Both have jobs involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +3
Management Consultant: 1
Both management consultants: 3
Trader: 2
Both traders: 5
High-powered lawyer: 2
Both high-powered lawyers: 5
Teacher at a New York City or Connecticut private school: 2
Parents from New York City or wealthy suburb in Connecticut: 1
New York Times employee: 1
State Department employee: 2
Bride is an elementary school teacher: 1
Works in media: 1
Ivy league graduate: 1 *
Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: 2*
Both Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: 5*
For each subsequent degree after a B.A.: 1
Ivy league B.A. with graduate degree at low-ranking local
college/university: -1
If bride or groom attended/teach at any school with "Country Day" in
the name: +2
Coro fellow at NYU Law: +1
Graduated Cum Laude: 1
Graduated Magna Cum Laude: 2
Couple met online: -1
Graduated Summa Cum Laude: 3
Woman is at ideal age for getting married (25): 1
Man is at ideal age for getting married (27): 1
For each member of couple over 35: -1
Couple married by a Cantor: +1
Couple met during or before their freshman year in college: +2
Bride or groom goes by middle name: +1
Mother a nursery school/kindergarten teacher or reading
specialist/father is a wealthy professional= +3
If the groom is Jewish and the bride Asian: +2
If the groom is Asian and the bride is Jewish: -1
The bride/bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce: -2
Descendant/related to somebody famous: +3
Descendant of a founding father: +4
Groom wearing gingham in picture: +1
Parent is a trustee or board member of a company or organization: +1
per company/org
Parent is a member of the Bermuda parliament: +2
Bride or Groom is a board member of a company or organization: +1 per
company/org
Bride "is keeping her name", "will continue to use her name professionally": -1
If there is a Jr., II, III or IV in a name: +2
If someone famous comes to the wedding and is mentioned: +2
If wedding ceremony held at Bethesda by the Sea in Palm Beach, and/or
reception under a tent at the bride's grandmother's house in P.B: +2
Bride clearly quits her job after the wedding: +1
Married by an Episcopal priest: +1
Groom is 20-30 years older than bride: +2
Bride and groom both from New Jersey: -2
Partner in corporate law firm: +3
Bridge teaches elementary school, groom in finance: +2

*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

Altarcations: Patricia Haggerty & Brian Dodwell

aswerdloff — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 14:04:53 EDT

As noted philosopher Carrie Bradshaw once put it, the New York Times wedding announcements are "the straight woman's sports pages." Altarcations is all about scoring the game. Each week, we evaluate the latest newlyweds, based on an elaborate rating system, described below.

Right out of the gate this week, Rona Shalev and David Kraut were looking like strong contenders, but David's 24-inspired proposal involving the "Situation Room"—as in, his bedroom, eww—cost them some points. Sara Luft and Joshua Wechter were also looking good, mostly thanks to Joshua's two undergrad degrees from Penn, but their meet-cute story involving pantyhose was just too Bridget Jones's Diary. Enter Patricia Haggerty and Brian Dodwell. Brian's dad owns Nisbet Plantation Beach Club in Nevins and is a member of the lower house of Bermuda's parliament. Bermuda, of course, is our favorite self-governing British colony!

Patricia Haggerty, Brian Dodwell: 8 points

Patricia studying for MA in education at George Mason University: +1

Patricia is an elementary school teacher: +1

Brian has MA in national security studies from Georgetown: +1

Mother teaches at private school, father owns a beach club with the word "Plantation" in it in Nevis: +3

Father is a member of the lower house of Bermuda's parliament: +2

Rona Shalev, David Kraut: 7 points

David's parents from New York City: +1

Rona has PhD from Yeshiva University: +1

Rona's mother co-founded a kosher dessert catering business in Great Neck: +1

David is an associate at Debevoise & Plimpton: +2

David graduated cum laude from Yale: +3

David was a Coro fellow at NYU Law: +2

David and Rona met online: -1

In his proposal to Rona, David made a musical spoof of 24, because, as he put it, "we both enjoy the show." At the end of the video, the screen went blank and an announcement came on saying, "report to The Situation Room," aka David's bedroom, where he proposed: -2

Sara Luft, Joshua Wechter: 6 points

Sara is an I-banker: +2

Joshua works in real estate investment: +1

Joshua has two undergraduate degrees from Upenn (one in history, one in management): +2

Couple met during junior year of high school at "National Young Leaders" conference: +1

Couple married by a Cantor: +1

During the Young Leaders conference, Sara walked into the elevator with her skirt tucked into pantyhose; Joshua was first one to tease her, and later recalled: "I was very attracted to Sara when I first met her." For his assman-related tendencies, we're going to have to give them: -1

Guide to Alexis' Patented Rating System—once again updated with your brilliant suggestions!

Investment banker: 2
Both Investment bankers: 5
Job involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +1
Both have jobs involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +3
Management Consultant: 1
Both management consultants: 3
Trader: 2
Both traders: 5
High-powered lawyer: 2
Both high-powered lawyers: 5
Teacher at a New York City or Connecticut private school: 2
Parents from New York City or wealthy suburb in Connecticut: 1
New York Times employee: 1
State Department employee: 2
Bride is an elementary school teacher: 1
Works in media: 1
Ivy league graduate: 1 *
Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: 2*
Both Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: 5*
For each subsequent degree after a B.A.: 1
-Ivy league B.A. with graduate degree at low-ranking local
college/university: -1"
If bride or groom attended/teach at any school with "Country Day" in
the name: +2
Coro fellow at NYU Law: +1
Graduated Cum Laude: 1
Graduated Magna Cum Laude: 2
Couple met online: -1
Graduated Summa Cum Laude: 3
Woman is at ideal age for getting married (25): 1
Man is at ideal age for getting married (27): 1
For each member of couple over 35: -1
Couple married by a Cantor: +1
Couple met during or before their freshman year in college: +2
Bride or groom goes by middle name: +1
Mother a nursery school/kindergarten teacher or reading
specialist/father is a wealthy professional= +3
If the groom is Jewish and the bride Asian: +2
If the groom is Asian and the bride is Jewish: -1
The bride/bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce: -2
Descendant/related to somebody famous: +3
Descendant of a founding father: +4
Groom wearing gingham in picture: +1
Parent is a trustee or board member of a company or organization: +1
per company/org
Parent is a member of the Bermuda parliament: +2
Bride or Groom is a board member of a company or organization: +1 per
company/org
Bride "is keeping her name", "will continue to use her name professionally": -1
If there is a Jr., II, III or IV in a name: +2
If someone famous comes to the wedding and is mentioned: +2
If wedding ceremony held at Bethesda by the Sea in Palm Beach, and/or
reception under a tent at the bride's grandmother's house in P.B: +2
Bride clearly quits her job after the wedding: +1
Married by an Episcopal priest: +1

*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

Earlier: Hanna Swacker and Jesse Kurnit

Altarcations: Hanna Swacker and Jesse Kurnit

Emily Gould — Mon, 12 Mar 2007 17:45:25 EDT

When we saw that someone named Ambrose Car III was getting married we were sure he and his wife Elizabeth would come out on top, but even with Elizabeth's certificate in decorative and fine arts from Sotheby's and AC III's gingham shirt, the points just didn't add up. Brown couple Rebecca Traub and Jeffrey Chang were pretty neck and neck with St. Ann's royalty Hannah Swacker and Jesse Kurnit, but the fact that Jeffrey was Asian and Rebecca Traub was Jewish lost them a point. Behold the Penn-grad-free results!

Hannah Swacker, Jesse Kurnit : 8 points

Hannah's parents are from New York City: +1

Jesse is 27 (ideal age for man): +1

Hannah works at St. Ann's, attended St. Ann's, and her father is a

teacher at St. Ann's: +3

Jesse's mother is a nursery school teacher/father is a marketing consultant: +3

Elizabeth Galbreath, Ambrose Carr III: 6 points

Ambrose has a "III" in his name: +2

Elizabeth's parents are from Greenwich: +1

Elizabeth has a certificate in decorative and fine arts from Sotheby's: +2

Ambrose is 41: -1

Ambrose is a financial planner: +1

Ambrose is wearing a gingham shirt in the picture: +1

Rebecca Traub, Jeffrey Chang: 6 points

Jeffrey Asian, Rebecca Jewish: -1
Jeffrey went to Brown: +1
Rebecca went to Brown: +1
Both received medical degrees from Brown: = +4
Rebecca's parents from NYC: +1

Guide to Alexis' Patented Rating System—once again updated with your brilliant suggestions!

Investment banker: 2
Both Investment bankers: 5
Job involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +1
Both have jobs involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +3
Management Consultant: 1
Both management consultants: 3
Trader: 2
Both traders: 5
High-powered lawyer: 2
Both high-powered lawyers: 5
Teacher at a New York City or Connecticut private school: 2
Parents from New York City or wealthy suburb in Connecticut: 1
New York Times employee: 1
State Department employee: 2
Works in media: 1
Ivy league graduate: 1 *
Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: 2*
Both Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: 5*
For each subsequent degree after a B.A.: 1
-Ivy league B.A. with graduate degree at low-ranking local
college/university: -1"
If bride or groom attended/teach at any school with "Country Day" in
the name: +2
Graduated Cum Laude: 1
Graduated Magna Cum Laude: 2
Graduated Summa Cum Laude: 3
Woman is at ideal age for getting married (25): 1
Man is at ideal age for getting married (27): 1
For each member of couple over 35: -1
Couple met during or before their freshman year in college: +2
Bride or groom goes by middle name = +1
Mother a nursery school/kindergarten teacher or reading
specialist/father is a wealthy professional= +3
If the groom is Jewish and the bride Asian: +2
If the groom is Asian and the bride is Jewish: -1
The bride/bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce: -2
Descendant/related to somebody famous: +3
Descendant of a founding father: +4
Groom wearing gingham in picture: +1
Parent is a trustee or board member of a company or organization: +1
per company/org
Bride or Groom is a board member of a company or organization: +1 per
company/org
Bride "is keeping her name", "will continue to use her name professionally": -1
If there is a Jr., II, III or IV in a name: +2
If someone famous comes to the wedding and is mentioned: +2
If wedding ceremony held at Bethesda by the Sea in Palm Beach, and/or
reception under a tent at the bride's grandmother's house in P.B: +2
Bride clearly quits her job after the wedding: +1
Married by an Episcopal priest: +1

*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

Altarcations: Stacey Harris And Daniel Maman

Choire — Mon, 05 Mar 2007 13:00:13 EST

This week was a queer battle of the couples in Vows, what with the special ed teaching mothers and the wealthy professional fathers. We thought that the Greenberg-Slonim nuptials would surely take the lead (we loved the gratuitous mention of their "family" bench in Central Park), but it was boring, over-achieving Penn grads from New Jersey who ended up bringing home the bacon. How? How could such a travesty occur?

This week's rankings:

Gayle Greenberg, Matthew Slonim: 8 points

Gayle has an M.B.A. from U. Chicago: +1
Matthew is in real estate investment: +1
Matthew has an M.B.A. from NYU: +1
Matthew's parents are from New York City: +1
Matthew's father owns a law firm in New York "bearing his name":+2
During his insane, drawn out "Quest for Yes" scavenger hunt of a proposal, Matthew made Gayle "Go for a jog to the park bench in Central Park that had been donated by his parents" for no other reason than to show off: +2

Iris Lifshitz, Adam Lindenbaum: 10 points

Iris will continue to use her name professionally: -1
Adam's parents are from New York City: +1
Iris has a masters in social work from NYU:+1
Iris's mother is on the board of the American fund-raising and educational arm of the Holocuast museum in Jerusalem: +1
Adam is a high-powered lawyer: +2
Adam graduated from Cornell: +1
Adam received a law degree from St. John's: +1
Groom's mother is a special ed teacher, father marketing and advertising consultant: +3

Stacey Harris, Daniel Maman: the winners, with 12 points

Both went to U Penn: +2
Both graduated magna cum laude: +4
Stacey is an I-banker: +2
Stacey's mother is a special-ed teacher and father is a dentist: +3
Adam has an M.B.A. from Oxford: +3
Both from New Jersey: -2

Guide to Alexis' Patented Rating System—once again updated with your brilliant suggestions!

*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

Altarcations: Leah Popowich and Andrew Hohns

Emily Gould — Mon, 26 Feb 2007 13:27:42 EST

As noted philosopher Carrie Bradshaw once put it, the New York Times wedding announcements are "the straight woman's sports pages." Altarcations is all about scoring the game. Every week, we will evaluate the latest newlyweds, based on an elaborate rating system, described below.

This Sunday's Vows section didn't provide any contenders as strong as last week's winners, Christy Sylvester and Joseph Patt. And while we'd sentimentally hoped that godly bankers Ashley Cargill and Gregory Buechele might make a showing, it turns out that late night Bible study doesn't rack up any points. In the end, it was between two Ivy-bedecked couples, and only one could triumph....

Leah Popowich and Andrew Hohns: 15 Points

Leah received a B.A. from Penn: +2
Leah received an M.A. from Penn: + 3
Andrew received a B.A. from Penn: +2
Andrew received an M.A. from Penn: +3
Andrew's an I-banker: +1
Andrew's on the board of the Philadelphia Mural Arts Program: +1
Father was the deputy public printer of the United States under George H.W. Bush, overseeing document production: +3
RUNNERS UP:
Katherine Criner and Andy Bellin: 13 Points
Katherine graduated from Princeton: +3
Katherine graduated cum laude: +1
Katherine is the accessories editor at Harper's Bazaar (media job): +1
Andy was an editor at the Paris Review, now an author (media job): +1
Andy's parents are from New York: +1
Katherine's mother is a trustee of the Contemporary Art Museum in Houston: +1
Andy's mother was a model and there's a nude picture of her by Richard
Avedon at the Met: +3
Andy's maternal grandmother, Countess Alicia Spaulding Paolozzi,
helped Gian Carlo Menotti found the Spoleto Festival U.S.A. in
Charleston, S.C., in 1977. She also drove for the winning women's team
in the 1958 automotive Tour De France: +3
Andy is 38: -1
Understanding Intern Alexis's Patented Vows Scoring System, Now Improved With Your Choicest Suggestions From Last Week (Send More)

Investment banker: 2
Both Investment bankers: 5
Management Consultant: 1
Both management consultants: 3
Trader: 2
Both traders: 5
High-powered lawyer: 2
Both high-powered lawyers: 5
Teacher at a New York City or Connecticut private school: 2
Parents from New York City or wealthy suburb in Connecticut: 1
New York Times employee: 1
Works in media: 1
Ivy league graduate: 2 *
Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: 3*
Both Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: 7*
For each subsequent degree after a B.A.: 1
If bride or groom attended/teach at any school with "Country Day" in
the name: +2
Graduated Cum Laude: 1
Graduated Magna Cum Laude: 2
Graduated Summa Cum Laude: 3
Woman is at ideal age for getting married (25): 1
Man is at ideal age for getting married (27): 1
For each member of couple over 35: -1
Couple met during or before their freshman year in college: +2
Bride or groom goes by middle name = +1
Mother a kindergarten teacher or reading specialist/father a wealthy
industrialist = +3
If the groom is Jewish and the bride Asian: +2
If the groom is Asian and the bride is Jewish: -1
The bride/bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce: -2
Descendant/related to somebody famous: +3
Descendant of a founding father: +4
Parent is a trustee or board member of a company or organization: +1
per company/org
Bride or Groom is a board member of a company or organization: +1 per
company/org
Bride "is keeping her name", "will continue to use her name professionally": -1
If there is a Jr., II, III or IV in a name: +2
If someone famous comes to the wedding and is mentioned: +2

*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

Earlier: Christy Sylvester and Joseph Patt

Altarcations: Christy Sylvester and Joseph Patt

Emily Gould — Mon, 19 Feb 2007 15:16:20 EST

As noted philosopher Carrie Bradshaw once put it, the New York Times wedding announcements are "the straight woman's sports pages." Altarcations is all about scoring the game. Every week, we will evaluate the latest newlyweds, based on an elaborate rating system, described below.

This Sunday, the extremely intense Vows competition immediately centered on three young couples. Things were looking fairly close—until one fella's mass of Ivy League degrees really blew the other two bridegrooms out of the water. Then, a contender was found to be responsible for the discovery of Maroon 5. Whoops! Sunk! And so one couple came rocketing out ahead, with a quite respectable 21 points.

Christy Sylvester and Joseph Patt: 21 Points

Both Yale graduates: +7
Groom graduated Magna Cum Laude from Yale: +2
Groom has M.A. from Yale and a Law Degree from Harvard: +6
Groom graduated magna cum laude from HLS: 2
Bride is "keeping her name": -1
Both Investment bankers: +5

RUNNERS UP:

Boji Wong and Benjamin Berkman: 9 Points

Bride is a high-powered lawyer: +2
Bride is an Ivy league graduate: +2
Bride is related to someone famous (mother was a member of the original ensemble of Rodgers and Hammerstein's "Flower Drum Song" on Broadway): +3
Bride's parents from New York City: +1
Groom's parents from New York City: +1
Groom is in the media: +1
The groom is Jewish and the bride is Asian: +2
Groom "discovered and signed the Los Angeles-based pop band Maroon 5": -3
Mayor David Dinkins officiated: +0

Anne Maffei and John Eaton Jr.: 9 Points

Both over 35: -2
Bride is an I-banker: +2
Bride will continue to use her name professionally: -1
Bride has an MBA from Harvard: +4
Groom is in the media: +1 [Ed. Note: Barely!]
Groom has a Jr. in his name: +2
Groom is a descendant of Frederick Eaton, the mayor of Los Angeles from 1898 to 1900: +3

Understanding Intern Alexis's Patented Vows Scoring System
Investment banker: 2
Both Investment bankers: 5
Management Consultant: 1
Both management consultants: 3
Trader: 2
Both traders: 5
High-powered lawyer: 2
Both high-powered lawyers: 5
Teacher at a New York City or Connecticut private school: 2
Parents from New York City or wealthy suburb in Connecticut: 1
New York Times employee: 1
Works in media: 1
Ivy league graduate: 2 *
Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: 3*
Both Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: 7*
For each subsequent degree after a B.A.: 1
Graduated Cum Laude: 1
Graduated Magna Cum Laude: 2
Graduated Summa Cum Laude: 3
Woman is at ideal age for getting married (25): 1
Man is at ideal age for getting married (27): 1
For each member of couple over 35: -1
Couple met during or before their freshman year in college: +2
If the groom is Jewish and the bride Asian: +2
The bride/bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce: -2
Descendant/related to somebody famous: +3
Descendant of a founding father: +4
Parent is a trustee or board member of a company: +2
Bride or Groom is a board member of a company: +2
Bride "is keeping her name", "will continue to use her name professionally": -1
If there is a Jr., II, III or IV in a name: +2

*Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s

PREVIOUSLY: Internal Documents: Naming Our 'Vows' Column