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New York, 10:06 AM
Sat Nov 28
15 posts in the last 24 hours

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    Tabloids' Innocence Shattered as Maybe 13 Year-Old Is Not Baby Daddy

    All You Have to Do to Get Famous These Days Is Have a Baby or Fourteen
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of ObtuseIntolerant ObtuseIntolerant
    02/18/09

    In reply to Tabloids' Innocence Shattered as Maybe 13 Year-Old Is Not Baby Daddy
    Gah - I have been saying this was the story all along and I have the Gawker/Jezebel comment history to back it up, durnit all.
     Reply
    ObtuseIntolerant was starred ObtuseIntolerant was unstarred
    Image of Auntie_Meme Auntie_Meme
    02/18/09

    @ObtuseIntolerant: Congratulations! You've won a gift certificate for a foreskin restoration on the penis of your choice. Please forward a photo of the penis to be restored to tips@gawker.com.
     Reply
    Auntie_Meme was starred Auntie_Meme was unstarred
    Image of ObtuseIntolerant ObtuseIntolerant
    02/18/09

    @Auntie_Meme: Cute.
     Reply
    ObtuseIntolerant was starred ObtuseIntolerant was unstarred
    Image of pufflehuff pufflehuff
    02/18/09

    @Auntie_Meme: Heartwarmingly kind!
     Reply
    pufflehuff was starred pufflehuff was unstarred
    Image of Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith
    02/18/09

    In reply to Tabloids' Innocence Shattered as Maybe 13 Year-Old Is Not Baby Daddy
    I love how everyone has become so wrapped up in whether or not this boy is the father or not, that it seems people have forgotten that the mothe is only freakin' 15! It's weird how much attention is being cast on her alleged promiscuity when it is glaringly obvious that there are far more problematic aspects to this story.
     Reply
    Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith was starred Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith was unstarred
    Image of Dave J. Dave J.
    02/18/09

    In reply to Tabloids' Innocence Shattered as Maybe 13 Year-Old Is Not Baby Daddy
    "On the next Maury Chavich show...."
     Reply
    Dave J. was starred Dave J. was unstarred
    Image of Truculent Truculent
    02/18/09

    In reply to Tabloids' Innocence Shattered as Maybe 13 Year-Old Is Not Baby Daddy
    It's kind of hard to imagine little Alfie "hanging on" long enough to get fully situated in Ms. Chantelle before firing the fateful shot. Even more surprising that he was able to fire for effect. One can't help but imagine the poor lad trying to figure out what goes where, so to speak
     Reply
    Truculent was starred Truculent was unstarred
    Image of lobstr lobstr
    02/18/09

    @Truculent: yes, and I'm sure it was quite a stimulating experience... he had quite a ball, as he thrust into this situation.
     Reply
    lobstr was starred lobstr was unstarred
    Image of allyzay allyzay
    02/18/09

    In reply to Tabloids' Innocence Shattered as Maybe 13 Year-Old Is Not Baby Daddy


    sorry in advance for this.

     Reply
    allyzay was starred allyzay was unstarred
    Image of The Real JR The Real JR
    02/18/09

    In reply to Tabloids' Innocence Shattered as Maybe 13 Year-Old Is Not Baby Daddy
    I was thinking this was the case. The boy totally looks like he's never gone through puberty so I was wondering whether she was molested by an older man and in order to cover that up she played it off as this child's baby.


    It's all crazy.


    Again, this is not Britain's youngest father. The youngest was 12.

     Reply
    The Real JR was starred The Real JR was unstarred
    Image of Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith
    02/18/09

    @The Real JR: Ugh, really? The mother is only a child herself. Why jump to such massive conclusions?
     Reply
    Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith was starred Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith was unstarred
    Image of Josh Rachford Josh Rachford
    02/18/09

    In reply to Tabloids' Innocence Shattered as Maybe 13 Year-Old Is Not Baby Daddy
     Reply
    Josh Rachford was starred Josh Rachford was unstarred
    Image of Uncle_Billy_Slumming Uncle_Billy_Slumming
    02/18/09

    @qiaohua:


    It took me almost a full minute to realize this wasn't photoshopped.

     Reply
    Uncle_Billy_Slumming was starred Uncle_Billy_Slumming was unstarred
    Image of sassenach sassenach
    02/18/09

    In reply to Tabloids' Innocence Shattered as Maybe 13 Year-Old Is Not Baby Daddy
    Usually one must go to a bowling alley to meet people of this stature.
     Reply
    sassenach was starred sassenach was unstarred
    Image of BowlingForDollars BowlingForDollars
    02/18/09

    @sassenach: That's pretty insulting to bowling alleys. I know these things.
     Reply
    BowlingForDollars was starred BowlingForDollars was unstarred
    Image of BookishLookish BookishLookish
    02/18/09

    @BowlingForDollars: You tell 'im, baby. Fucking snob.
     Reply
    BookishLookish was starred BookishLookish was unstarred
    Image of SuperBien SuperBien
    02/18/09

    @sassenach: @BowlingForDollars: Monster Truck Shows? Tobey Keith concerts?
     Reply
    SuperBien was starred SuperBien was unstarred
    Image of lobstr lobstr
    02/18/09

    @SuperBien: the long audience line for The Price is Right...
     Reply
    lobstr was starred lobstr was unstarred
    Image of Mount_Prion Mount_Prion
    02/18/09

    In reply to Tabloids' Innocence Shattered as Maybe 13 Year-Old Is Not Baby Daddy
    The only thing that can save us from this tragedy is the Watchmen.


    [www.toplessrobot.com]

     Reply
    Mount_Prion was starred Mount_Prion was unstarred
    Image of Oy Veh (Informality Reigns) Oy Veh (Informality Reigns)
    02/18/09

    In reply to Tabloids' Innocence Shattered as Maybe 13 Year-Old Is Not Baby Daddy
    His parents named him Alfie--HASN'T HE SUFFERED ENOUGH??
     Reply
    Oy Veh (Informality Reigns) was starred Oy Veh (Informality Reigns) was unstarred
    Image of OwenKlient OwenKlient
    02/18/09

    In reply to Tabloids' Innocence Shattered as Maybe 13 Year-Old Is Not Baby Daddy
    That poor girl certainly lucked out on parents, huh? Neglected her upbringing so that she had to get attention from 6 guys, then put all of her business in the street for a few bucks.

    Also: Why is it such a big deal that a 13 year old is a father? Doesn't this happen all the time? Is it only "new" in Britain?
     Reply
    OwenKlient was starred OwenKlient was unstarred
    Image of Colander Colander
    02/18/09

    @OwenKlient: He's white.
     Reply
    Colander was starred Colander was unstarred
    Image of BookishLookish BookishLookish
    02/18/09

    In reply to Tabloids' Innocence Shattered as Maybe 13 Year-Old Is Not Baby Daddy
    What's it all about, Alfie.
     Reply
    BookishLookish was starred BookishLookish was unstarred
    Image of ObtuseIntolerant ObtuseIntolerant
    02/18/09

    @BookishLookish: Best ever.
     Reply
    ObtuseIntolerant was starred ObtuseIntolerant was unstarred
    Image of pufflehuff pufflehuff
    02/18/09

    @BookishLookish:


    ALFIE: "What's 'financially'?"


    True story. [women.timesonline.co.uk]


    Saddest of sadfaces.

     Reply
    pufflehuff was starred pufflehuff was unstarred
    Image of pufflehuff pufflehuff
    02/16/09

    In reply to All You Have to Do to Get Famous These Days Is Have a Baby or Fourteen
    All this would be made okay/immeasurably worse if Aquaman and Octomom could get high and get together. They could be kept in an aquarium!
     Reply
    pufflehuff was starred pufflehuff was unstarred
    Image of Kitten_Witawip Kitten_Witawip
    02/16/09

    @pufflehuff: Maybe they could be on the next Big Brother and have to share a room with Chris Brown.
     Reply
    Kitten_Witawip was starred Kitten_Witawip was unstarred
    Image of pufflehuff pufflehuff
    02/16/09

    @Kitten_Witawip: This has all the makings of the world's worst graphic novel.
     Reply
    pufflehuff was starred pufflehuff was unstarred
    Image of Kitten_Witawip Kitten_Witawip
    02/16/09

    @pufflehuff: Would you prefer "Media Whore Rehab with Dr. Drew"?
     Reply
    Kitten_Witawip was starred Kitten_Witawip was unstarred
    Image of pufflehuff pufflehuff
    02/16/09

    @Kitten_Witawip: Will it cleanse my mind? Because all I can see now are screaming tiny babies and tentacles offering Phish-Phelps a bong hit as Rihanna cries behind her eyepatch.
     Reply
    pufflehuff was starred pufflehuff was unstarred
    Image of DorothyMantooth DorothyMantooth
    02/16/09

    In reply to All You Have to Do to Get Famous These Days Is Have a Baby or Fourteen
    In this, as in all things, I blame TLC. That John & Kate show that I've never watched but people tell me is super compelling. And then that Krazy Kristian family with all the tots? I think it's that shit, more so than Angelina or whatever, that's making this whole phenomenon au courant.


    Also, Britain's youngest dad was apparently 12. Yikes!

     Reply
    DorothyMantooth was starred DorothyMantooth was unstarred
    Image of pufflehuff pufflehuff
    02/16/09

    @DorothyMantooth: Yes, yes he was. Alfie is part of a proud tradition.


    Ben's birth fab, says dad (12)


    BRITAIN'S youngest dad, Sean Stewart, who was just 11 when he fathered five-day-old Ben, said the birth of his baby was ''great'' - he got a day off school.

    Sean, now 12, and his 16-year-old girlfriend, next-door neighbour Emma Webster, said they were delighted.

    But Sean does not want Ben to be a dad at 12 - ''he'll be too young''.

    They said they hoped to stay ''close friends for as long as possible''.


    [archives.tcm.ie]


    They broke up after six months.


    (Extra bonus special treat - the Hillary Clinton standing-by-her-man piece at the top of the page! It was 1998 after all...)

     Reply
    pufflehuff was starred pufflehuff was unstarred
    Image of Shelwood Shelwood
    02/16/09

    @pufflehuff: So baby Ben is 11 this year? Uh-oh.
     Reply
    Shelwood was starred Shelwood was unstarred
    Image of miasma-protege miasma-protege
    02/16/09

    In reply to All You Have to Do to Get Famous These Days Is Have a Baby or Fourteen
    During the Great Depression, the Dionne Quintuplets became Ontario's official freakshow. I think there really is some connection between dustbowl days and the popular obsession with abnormally juicy wombs.


    [en.wikipedia.org]

     Reply
    miasma-protege was starred miasma-protege was unstarred
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