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All That Sucks About Steve
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All That Sucks About Steve |
09/06/09
How could this movie NOT be great?
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09/04/09
His finest hour came two years ago, when he reviewed Nic Cage's "National Treasure: Book of Secrets." He wrote it from he actor's perspective. Here's just the beginning:
"THIS is Nicolas CAGE. Remember when I used to make quiet movies for smart people? Things have CHANGED.
"National Treasure: Book of Secrets" is my latest LOUD movie for IDIOTS. It's another flick about maps, landmarks and buried treasure that makes "The Da Vinci Code" look like TOLSTOY. Remember how cleverly one clue led to the next in "National Treasure"? The sequel is more like CONNECT-THE-DOTS. And yes, I do continue to develop my HABIT of suddenly YELLING in the middle of a sentence."
I re-read this whenever I need a giggle. (Is that wrong? Perhaps I need help . . .)
09/04/09
"To call the characters cardboard is to insult a useful packing material...At one point, The Spirit takes three bullets in the forehead, leans forward and shakes them out. At another, he is skewered by a broadsword. Why, oh why, does he never die, he asks himself. And we ask it of him."
Nothing is wrong with you. I have a fondness for reading reviews of bad movies.
09/04/09
His review of Blood Diamond is one for the books, too. I loved that movie, because it's so enjoyable in that retarded, throwaway Big Hollywood way, and I also love the hating review K Smith wrote about it.
09/04/09
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09/04/09
Then how do you explain the vast open spaces in the Mid-West snuggled in between the coasts, Movie??? How do you explain Alaska?
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