You know how money, and by extension the oppressive global system of debt and credit that lives within its rotting husk, is just, like the worst? It's going to get marginally worse. Reuters' Felix Salmon flags the above shot of an ATM charging either $3 or 3% of the total withdrawal.

Have you used a Chase ATM near Union Square in Manhattan this year? If you live in or have traveled to Manhattan any time this year, I bet that you have! So, you should know that your ATM card information has been... not definitely stolen. But possibly! I'm sure you're just fine.

The man behind this rage-inducing ATM receipt? None other than David Tepper, founder of hedge fund Appaloosa Management, who keeps both a high balance in his savings account and brass replicas of testicles on his desk. [Dealbreaker]

How much do you have in your checking account? Probably enough to cover rent and the five vodka tonics it will take to make you forget that you just paid rent and are now officially tapped out. Right? Well, this one jackass keeps $100 million in his account.

It's bad enough worrying if an ATM is going to steal your pin number, but it's quite another thing to have an ATM vomit all over you as part of a prank television show.

Scientists in London took samples from busy ATMs and nearby toilets and discovered they have the same type and amount of bacteria. Either people are wiping with dollar bills or they aren't washing their hands. I'm sticking to credit cards.

You may already be aware of the practice of "card skimming," wherein thieves use hidden cameras and magnetic strip-readers to steal ATM customers' PIN number and card information. Here's a fascinating video taken from one of those hidden cameras.

Your money: Maybe not as safe as you think. Security expert Barnaby Jack showed off three different ways to hack an ATM last week, including one particularly flashy method that left the machine playing music and spitting out twenties.

We've all dreamed of smashing an ATM to get at the sweet, sweet money inside. But it always seemed like such a hassle. Dragging it behind a car? Messy crowbars? No more! Now you can rob ATMs the easy way.

Democrats just voted to advance financial regulatory reform today, thanks in part to the Tea Party's ex-boyfriend, Scott Brown. Hippie Senators Russ Feingold and Maria Cantwell refused to vote yea. So, is it a good bill?

We've all wanted to rob a free-standing ATM. It's just a fact. Well, a group of folks in NYC have actually gone and done it, going on an ATM-robbing spree. Costs two dollars every time, but it's worth it. [pic]

It seems New Yorkers are so broke these days, you can now find ATM machines that dispense cash in $5 increments. [Business Insider]