God is Punishing Michele Bachmann's Campaign Staffers With Empty Pockets Because They Won't Sign Nondisclosure Agreements

Everything that happens on Earth is the work of God. Hurricanes? God. Earthquakes? God. Michele Bachmann not coming anywhere remotely close to winning the GOP nomination for president? God. Bachmann not paying her campaign staffers because they refuse to sign nondisclosure agreements? I hate it to say it, but that's…
Baby Seal Tries to be Fierce
National Geographic Digital Nomad Andrew Evans visited a remote Antarctic island populated by fur seals, and made a video of the absurdly cute baby seals he met there. Check out the baby seal trying to be fierce at 0:15. He thinks he's roaring with fury, but the sound he creates is akin to a toddler's naptime snore.…
World's Tiniest Puppy Cheats Death
Remember Beyonce? She is two weeks old and was born weighing only four ounces. This may make her the smallest puppy in the world, ABC News reports. She may also be the world's most hard-luck puppy:
Cops Dive into Frigid Waters to Save Drowning Dog
A Baltimore cop with the city's Marine Unit dove into freezing cold waters in order to save a drowning dog. Not just any cop, either—this one is a cat person.
Santa Claus Is a Gay Couple Living in Chelsea
Click to viewHundreds of kids in New York City think that Santa Claus lives on West 22nd Street. He does not (he lives in the North Pole, duh)—these two guys do. But after receiving 450 letters, they're helping out anyway.
Dog Gives Birth to 17 Puppies, All Survive, Are Cute
A dog in Germany gave birth to 17 healthy puppies! They were bottle-fed because "their mother's nipples could have never coped with the demand," which is a set of words I never expected to read in an AP article.
Otter-Proof Boots
[Why, yes, that is a once-abandoned three-month-old sea otter named Ollie curled up for a nap on her rescuer Caitlin Dixon's boots. And, yes, it is, actually, the cutest picture ever taken. Photo via AP. And yes, there's video.]
Six-Year-Olds Steal Board Game, Snacks in World's Cutest Burglary
Two six-year-olds and a three-year-old were caught robbing a house in Covington, La. over the weekend, thankfully stopping the would-be thieves at the start of, presumably, the most adorable crime wave known to man. Here's their haul:
This Is a Monkey Riding a Pig, and It Will Not Burn Any Korans
It's been a hard week, between the Koran-burning man, and the enormous explosion in California, and the accusations of war crimes. You deserve a massage and a cold drink. But more than that: You deserve a monkey riding a pig.
Want to Help Name These Two Cute Baboon Babies?
Oh my god! The Prospect Park Zoo in Brooklyn has two baby baboons, and they are so cute. They also don't have names, and the zoo is holding a contest to name them. Do you want to watch them play?
A Leopard Can't Change His Shot
[This is a snow leopard cub at the Oklahoma City Zoo, investigating the photographer's camera. So cute! But yeah, it would actually eat you, for sure. Pic via AP.]
Adorable Primate Photographed for First Time Ever
[This delightful furry fellow is a Horton Plains slender loris, a species thought to be extinct until it was photographed in Sri Lanka by the Zoological Society of London. Next time let's use red-eye reduction, okay guys? Pic via AP.]
Gyrating Baby Dances His Way in to Our Hearts
Dancing babies, aren't they the greatest? This kid takes it to a new level, complete with table top groovy hip shaking and Elvis style finger pointing. All set to salsa music. Sweet dance moves? Check. Potty Training? Pending.
New Species Discovered in 'Lost World,' Most Are Cute
The very endearing results of a 2008 expedition to New Guinea's Foja Mountains have been released. The recently-discovered species include the smallest known wallaby and a frog with a nose. [Time; pic, from Foja in 2007, via AP]
