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Posts Tagged “
Balls
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Investigative Stories
A new interview's out with P. Diddy, in which he discusses how he gets ready for an evening: a nice ball-waxing followed by heaps of cologne on his privates. Now it's time for everybody to go home. [Crazy Days and Nights]
Flaming Balls of Douche
Jakob Lodwick is Sick of Your Infernal Minimum Wage
Why all the poverty in America? Vimeo-founding Julia Allison-ex and tedious fameball douche Jakob Lodwick thinks it's because all those poor, poor corporations are forced to pay a minimum wage that many prospective workers are simply not qualified for. In a rhetorical interview with himself (Oh, what a device!) Lodwick sure does make some convincing arguments. More »
listicles
Your Balls, in Five Bullet Points
CBS News has been running a lot unappetizing stories about sex lately. First it was "Things You Didn't Know About Your Penis" (or "Four Things I Already Knew About Your Penis And One That Grossed Me Out"). Then there was "Top 10 Reasons To Have Sex Tonight" (or "10 Terrible Reasons to Have Sex Tonight.") Instead of waiting for CBS to produce their inevitable list of factoids about testicles, we made our own. After the jump, five terribly important facts about balls. More »
oh well
When In Doubt: Balls
It's frustrating when one tries to write a real think piece and it totally goes down in flames. As happened to me not a moment ago. Sometimes the discourse just can't be raised. So, for today, I give up. After the jump is a clip of Heidi Klum and Ellen DeGeneres talking about balls. Heidi the Seal-marrying supermodel likes them, Ellen the lesbian talk show host has no idea what to do with them. Enjoy. More »
cults
Mediabistro founder Laurel Touby and all her Laurel Touby-loving friends have put together a very special Christmas video to wish you happy holidays! From Touby's "media family" (which includes husband Jon Fine, Bonnie Fuller, and Arianna Huffington) to yours (which probably doesn't), please have a "warm and fuzzy New Year!" It's just like that I Am African campaign but without any social good and slightly less funny!
Merry Christmas From Laurel Touby And Her Creepy Friends
Mediabistro founder Laurel Touby and all her Laurel Touby-loving friends have put together a very special Christmas video to wish you happy holidays! From Touby's "media family" (which includes husband Jon Fine, Bonnie Fuller, and Arianna Huffington) to yours (which probably doesn't), please have a "warm and fuzzy New Year!" It's just like that I Am African campaign but without any social good and slightly less funny!
tiny balls, big guns
Roid Rage Cops Roam In Brooklyn
One Brooklyn pharmacy has filled 19 prescriptions for human growth hormone or steroids for firefighters—and 29 cops have gotten prescriptions for steroids. Thanks to the craziness of baseball-land, the Village Voice finds a timely peg to run its NYPD steroids story! Just think: A bunch of macho guys with guns are bulking up. Frightening! Also, unsurprising! Now, the Voice claims that steroids and, particularly, human growth hormone are rarely prescribed, saying that HGH is usually only prescribed for people with a rare malady or "in the advanced stages of AIDS." This isn't really the case—for years now, doctors hand out prescriptions for Serostim and the like (testosterone patches, etc.) to people with HIV like it was candy. But we're probably safe in assuming there isn't a cluster of HIV-positive Brooklyn cops.
Cops On Steroids [VV]
balls
Everyone Was Groping Christopher Hitchens' "Smooth" Nutsack At The National Book Awards
Kirkus editors Chuck Shelton and Elaine Szewczyk (who apparently decided she didn't want her name used in this context after the Daily Intel item went up) both copped a feel of the National Book Award Loser for Nonfiction's junk last night. Chris was showing off the results a his recent Vanity Fair article, for which he'd waxed his "back, sack, and crack." The verdicts? "You cannot believe how smooth it is" and "As smooth as summer cherries."
When we were discussing what celebrities blog about, we somehow neglected Martha Stewart, and this is why we shouldn't have: "This most unusual perennial, Gomphocarpus physocarpus, is called the balloon plant. I like to call it hairy balls. A species of milkweed, it is often used as an ornamental plant and is striking in cut arrangements." [The Martha Blog]
balls
Fameball!
"I believe I am an early-stage Fameball, and nothing I do or say will change my trajectory. I will attempt to use this to my advantage," Vimeo founder and Star Editor At Large Julia Allison doinker Jakob Lodwick has been quoted as saying. Upon hearing Jakob's self-analysis, our first response was: "we want to quit our jobs." After all, writing about how obnoxious it is that Jakob has declared the process of his fame-accumulation unavoidable is, inescapably, part of the problem. After all, Jakob defines the fameball phenomenon as "individuals whose fame snowballs because journalists cover what they think other people want them to cover." But all that doesn't necessarily mean that Jakob is right. More »
balls out
Local Newscaster Gets Frank Opinion
Meet Larry Richette, a Philadelphian accused of assaulting his mother, a judge in the city of brotherly love. When a reporter arrived to interview the motherbeater, he offered a succinct yet articulate opinion of television news which, while somewhat blunt, is more or less commensurate to our own view. [Via MSNBC]
