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friday night newsdump
Obama Goes Ahead With NSA Internet-monitoring Program
Another Friday afternoon (in spirit!), another "Obama admin continues Bush admin-era 'national security' policy" story. This one is a mysterious NSA program called, ominously, "Einstein 3." More » -
human resources
How Much Do Your Favorite White House Staffers Make?
The White House released a list of all its staffers and their salaries, including the director of African American media, who makes $13,000 per year more than the director of Hispanic media. What would Sonia Sotomayor say? More » -
white house vistors
Dear Mr. President: Please Stop Palling Around With This Man
Barack Obama's bizarre alliance with NBC continued last week when the White House invited network chief/seasoned clubrat Ben Silverman over for a highly publicized meeting just in time for the launch of Silverman's shitty new show, The Philanthropist. More » -
witchcraft
Drudge Ponders: What's Another Way to Call Obama a Muslim Witch Doctor?
Matt Drudge reports exclusively this morning that President Barack Obama has been employing an African witch-doctor technique known as the "evil eye" in order to impose socialism on hard-working white Americans. More » -
charlatans
Glenn Beck Finding More Doltish Ways to Call Obama a Communist Dictator
Surely you're wondering what Glenn Beck was up to tonight, no? Oh, the usual, you know, insinuating that Barack Obama is a communist dictator because he condemned the military coup in Honduras, just like Fidel Castro and Hugo Chavez did. More » -
why a duck?
Duck Ringtone Interrupts President
In the middle of a speech today on, uh, Gay Rights maybe, President Obama was interrupted by a duck. It was someone's ringtone, apparently. More » -
rich people games
Barack Obama's Golf Index Is Dangerously High
Only last week, the socialist press was fawning over Obama's healthcare plan and Brian Williams was sleeping in Obama's bed. But now the backlash is winding up, and people are starting to notice that Barack Obama plays golf. More » -
mistresses
Mark Sanford's Argentine Mystery Woman Speaks
Maria Belen Chapur released a statement tonight to clear up some misconceptions about her, but didn't deny that she's been boning Mark Sanford, which is, according to Rush Limbaugh, all Barack Obama's fault (No, seriously, he really said that!). More » -
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Fight The Power?
Is Honduras' Military Junta The Hot New Revolution?
While you're out this morning at brunch, mumbling semi-coherent thoughts about how amazing the citizens of Iran are, people somewhere will be fighting for change, actually doing something to alter the course of history! Nope, not Iranians. Hondurans! Viva? More » -
Obama Mania
Obama Deli Obamaterializes in Baracklyn
It's getting so you can't throw a dead cat in this city without hitting something that says "Obama" on it. More » -
tgifnd
This Is Best Opportunity For a Friday Night Newsdump You'll Have All Year
Have you murdered or slept with someone you shouldn't have? Are you being forced to release some documents you totally don't want to? Do it right now. You'll never have a better opportunity. More » -
fandom
Barack Bobbleheads Don't Go Over Well in Brooklyn
Last night the Brooklyn Cyclones, a minor league affiliate of the New York Mets, transformed into the "Baracklyn Cyclones" to honor Barack Obama in "a night of patriotic partying at the ballpark." Some Cyclone fans were not pleased. More » -
stagecraft
Barack Obama Calls on Huffington Post Again
The Huffington Post came up with a great gimmick to get its blogger called on at today's press conference. And the White House came up with a great gimmick to look responsive to the people of Iran. Everybody wins. More » -
assholes
Andy McCarthy on How Barack Obama is Just Like Ahmadinejad
We thought we'd read nothing worse today than Kathryn Jean Lopez's op-ed on John Ensign's affair. But then we read her NRO colleague Andy McCarthy on how Obama is totally an Islamist Fundamentalist! More » -
fighting words
Barack Obama's Statement To Iran: "The World Is Watching."
President Barack Obama weighed in today on the chaos going down in Iran tonight via released statement. The message to the ruling government is pretty clear: you're going about this the wrong way, and you need to stop. Right now. More » -
good stuff
John Hodgman's Broadcast Correspondent's Speech: Obama Is The First Nerd
John Hodgman nailed an utterly hysterical speech to President Obama at the Radio and Television Correspondents dinner yesterday, slagging on media for a while, before hopefully designating Obama as our first nerd president. Obama's Vulcan salute after the jump. More » -
pic of the day
Well Done at the White House
[Barack Obama points tongs at you while cooking for a group of local male students, as a kick-off to Father's Day activities; image via Getty] -
propaganda
Barack Obama Is Lying to You About His Puppy
We smelled a story when we read that Bo's favorite food is tomatoes, but we had no idea how deep it went. Not long after we started sniffing it out the whole tissue of lies unraveled. More » -
spead reading
All Drudge Reads Anymore Is the Headline
Matt Drudge linking to a story about Obama's personal doctor criticizing his healthcare plan, which is funny and fits perfectly into the right-wing anti-Obama narrative of the terrors of "socialized medicine." Except Obama's doctor actually wants socialized medicine. Whatever. More » -
conspiracies
Now a Senator Is Encouraging the 'Birther' Nuts
Hmmmm, just what is Senator Tom Coburn suggesting, here, with his statement to a constituent about making sure "political candidates are eligible for the offices they seek"? Oh, right, he is appeasing a lunatic "birther." More » -
self-parody
Because PETA doesn't mind looking ridiculous in exchange for PR, they're protesting Obama's ninja-like fly-killing.
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Conservative Journalism
Bush Slams Obama in Horrendously Edited Washington Times Exclusive
George W. Bush spoke critically of Barack Obama in a Washington Times story being pushed hard by Drudge tonight, a story so big and important that the Times didn't bother to insert quotation marks before posting it to their website. More » -
injuries
Hillary Clinton Falls Down, Fractures Elbow
Well what the heck is going on with the Obama White House? Those pansy-ass liberals are just falling apart over there! First Sonia Sotomayor breaks her ankle at the airport (Who does that?!) and now Hillary has fractured her elbow. More » -
finance
Obama Set to Announce Wall Street Regulatory Overhaul
In an effort to prevent some of the events that led to the financial crisis in the future, the White House will unveil a sweeping overhaul of the nation's financial regulatory system tomorrow. Suck it Wall Street! More » -
breaking
Obama Extends Benefits To Gay Federal Employees
The AP is reporting tonight that the Obama administration plans to announce tomorrow that they're extending the same benefits available to spouses of straight employees to the spouses of gay and lesbian federal employees. More » -
hidden abilities
Barack Obama: Fly-Killing Badass
President Obama was doing an interview with CNBC today when a pesky fly started buzzing around, interrupting the proceedings. So, without missing a beat, Obama employed his stealth ninja reflexes and handily dispatched the pest. Watch and be in awe. More » -
scandals
Will Obama's Firing of an Inspector General Evolve Into a Major Scandal?
Last Wednesday a man named Gerald Walpin, a U.S. inspector general investigating the possible misuse of Americorps funds, received a call from the White House informing him of his firing, a firing some believe was politically motivated and highly illegal. More » -
relative success
The Obamas are the Kardashians of Book Publishing
Because everyone gets a piece! George Obama, president Barack's half-brother, has signed a deal with Simon & Schuster to publish Homeland, about his struggles with drugs and his eventual salvation through, gulp, community organizing. Our favorite tidbit about the tome: More » -
gossip roundup
Kate Gosselin And The Bounce House Of Death
Kate Gosselin angrily eats a popsicle, inflating a Bounce House of Death. Susan Boyle's back, bitch! So is Britain-Bound Britney. And someone makes a dumb pun involving Paris Hilton and a hard-on. Presenting your Saturday morning gossip roundup: More » -
jews
Filmmaker who documented Obama-hating Israelis has made a counterpoint about peacenik Israelis who love Obama.
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bio/pic
He's All Ears
Denzel Washington: He can do Malcolm X, and apparently, as evidenced in this still from last night's Letterman, he can do Barack Obama. [Jezebel] -
science
It Is Impossible to Convince the Bitters That Barack Obama Is Not a Muslim
10% of Americans still believe Barack Obama is a Muslim. And here is the fun bit: a new study suggests that attempts to correct that misperception only reinforce it. More » -
disasters
Yahoo Nukes Man's Photos Over Obama Comments
Flickr user Shepherd Johnson was browsing the official White House photostream one night when he decided to post a politically-charged comment. Then another, then another. Soon, without warning, Yahoo's photo-sharing service deleted his account, complete with 1,200 pictures.
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grumpy old men
Angelina Jolie's Dad Sure Is Mad at the President
Jon Voight is very mad at President Obama. In a speech at a Republican fundraiser last night, the actor called Obama a false prophet who fancies himself "Julius Caesar", thinking he will pacify nations with his words. Which is wrong! More » -
solidarity
Barack Obama Orders the Shaving of Stephen Colbert's Head
Stephen Colbert kicked off his week of U.S.O. broadcasts last night by attending boot camp to show solidarity with the troops stationed in Iraq, but that apparently wasn't quite enough, as Barack Obama ordered that his head be shaved. More » -
Rustic Journalism
Sean Hannity Interviews Sarah Palin In the Woods
Sean Hannity creepily interviewed Sarah Palin in some wooded area of Long Island, where Sarah proceeded to do what Sarah does—-Spewed out a maddening but hilariously folksy word soup that translates to "I told you so!" More » -
point/counterpoint
Obama Not Being Trotsky in Disguise: Good or Bad?
The Times Magazine had a good story by Matt Bai (who's always annoyed us and we don't even really know why) about how Obama's philosophy of government is all about, in Rahm Emanuel's phrase, "the art of the possible." More » -
freakouts
Iowa Senator Chuck Grassley Uses Twitter to Exhibit Insanity, Illiteracy
Barack Obama used his weekly YouTube address to announce his intention to address health-care reform in the coming months, an announcement that incited Republican Senator Chuck Grassley of Iowa to make a Herculean ass of himself by raging incoherently on Twitter. More » -
tragedies
Financial Crisis Forcing Hipsters To Be Weaned Off the Parental Teat
The global economic downturn is forcing parents of Williamsburg hipsters to drastically scale back their monthly allowances, forcing many of them to turn to drastic measures to pay for their PBR and Edensoy, drastic measures like actually getting jobs.
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