Word has it that THR publisher Eric Mika has "'burned through the company's cash flying back and forth to Asia' where he has a close personal friend." The paper's reps declined to comment, even as the money drought that resulted in editorial layoffs two weeks ago now threatens the remaining staff's critical coverage of Sundance. Their expense accounts reportedly have been frozen, they can't book rooms, and their paper may not even have a publisher by the time the fest begins next month — Mika himself is expected to be out of a job when his contract expires at the end of the year.

But! We digress. Who out there knows who's enticing the guy to Asia? Just how back-and-forth is "back-and-forth"? And can we get a little more specific with the location, too? It's a largish continent, last we checked. Operators are standing by.

• H'WOOD REPORTER FREEZE-UP [NYP]

This reminded Mr. [Hairspray performer Daniel] Robinson of the various handsome Latin boys who have been coming around backstage. It’s a real letdown, he said, when they inevitably reveal that they are the guest of a certain bearish showbiz fixture. “I’m like, ‘Eww. So how much is he paying you?’” he said.

Any guesses?

Five Card Studs: Harvey Fierstein's Poker Game [New York Observer]

Overheard at a press screening. Well-known but little respected TV critic whose son is also a well-known but little respected TV critic, trash-talking highly respected older critic who was replaced by his son.

He called the older replaced critic a "pathetic old putz," and suggested he should be thankful he still has his print column. As well, he suggested that the older critic's original show wouldn't work anymore because nobody wants to watch "two geeky guys." He glowed about how successful his son was at 27, appearing on at least six different networks. And that he didn't understand all of the anger directed at his son because it's only film criticism and that's nothing serious (even though that's what he does as well).

Arrgh. We did have it pegged as a Jeffrey Lyons/Ben Lyons/Roger Ebert love-in — until that part about "six different networks." The Facebook group I Have a Photo With Keira Knightley!!! is not considered an actual network, is it? Any other 27-year-olds with bad-critic fathers we've overlooked?

POP QUIZ—MIX N' MATCH

1.) "Jesus Christ, could you be any more of a bitch if you tried?!"
2.) "Seriously, dude, you should just quit... I can't imagine writing any of this shit is making you happy."
3.) "If you really believe what you just wrote you are half-way to soulless."
4.) "thank you for being a very noble and good person"
5.) "i want you to call your broker and buy a LARGE position in SORC tomorrow, after the market opens and BEFORE it closes. They report tomorrow after close and I expect them to beat earnings significantly, and I expect to see a huge short squeeze."
6.) "Did I mention how much sex I've gotten off of Gawker? It's weird. WEIRD!"

WHO SAID THE ABOVE? GUESS! The answers are in no particular order, to protect the guilty parties.

a.) Emily Gould, former Gawker
b.) Ryan Adams
c.) Rod Townsend, commenter
d.) My boyfriend, after I leaked something off the record
e.) Julia Allison
f.) ??

Also, the above pic is one of Men's Vogue writer Hud Morgan that someone sent me. Not sure who, or why. But I enjoyed it. Oh, and also, thank you to the person who sent me six pictures of someone (himself?) receiving oral sex.

Thank you. All of you! Here's how to get a reservation at the Waverly Inn:

"It said to call Graydon's office (which I will have to find) and tell the receptionist you're a friend of (insert someone who attended his wedding reception) and they asked you to call his office and ask for John because you would like reservations at the precious Waverly Inn. Then they'll put John on the line for your reservation. Is this true and is it that easy??"

[T]wo days before the Oct. 29 surgery, the celebrity's people sent Trubenbach an email saying they had one condition: The actor would only write the check if Trubenbach agreed to turn over the boy's passport to his foundation.

Dumbfounded, Trubenbach asked why, but got no answer. She wouldn't do it. The celebrity pulled his offer. The surgery was going to be cancelled, Trubenbach tearfully told Brenda Hampton, a friend of hers who is also the producer of TV shows Seventh Heaven and The Secret Life of an American Teenager. On Sunday, with less than 24 hours left before the scheduled surgery, Hampton called American Express to get approval for a $180,000 purchase on her card.

Almost a year later, the kid is fixed up, and we're wondering who's got both the juice to make a deal like this and the balls to pull the plug on the eve of his surgery. Everybody in Hollywood gives, but only a few select charitable souls have their own foundations: The Bruce Willis Foundation has some history with Africa, as does (obviously) the Jolie/Pitt Foundation. Dwayne Johnson's Rock Foundation mission is "to make every child smile," but seems to mostly focus on Americans. Ideas, anyone?

• Zimbabwe village outcast embraced by O.C. school kids [OC Register]

Just saw a famous male tv personality leave a dollar store, crying. Life

Ah yes, life. We'll leave you to your guesswork now, keeping in mind a few things: 1. Ronen's profile lists him as being in NYC. 2. Lovably addled Oscars pre-show emcee Regis Philbin was born during the Great Depression, making him appreciative of a good bargain. 3. We're suddenly in the mood for a good cry and some lead-laced Chrest toothpaste. We'll see you in a few.

• Ronen's Twitter

Other quality threads include,

• "omg— did the criminal search thing and found SO much on my brother. so sad."
• "what would you buy for 100.00 at Bendels?"
  and finally:
• "i think i have finally decided to go ahead and have my tail surgically removed."
  
  Like... a devilish gossip tail, similar to Satan's? We have no idea.

Also, you definitely have to be a girl. But a girl without a criminal background.

Penenberg had been commissioned to write a cover story, in 1999, for Forbes on the end of privacy. (Privacy has been ending since way before the proliferation of blogs.) The editor suggested, as a gimmick, that the magazine commission an investigation into Jules Kroll, the legendary founder of one of the best-known corporate spy firms.

The reporter ran the project past one of Kroll's rivals. "Well, you know, you could easily find someone to do that," the P.I. said. But he advised Penenberg that there were photos floating around of the mistress of a man high up on the magazine's masthead. "And if I've got 'em, Kroll's got 'em."

In the feature that appeared, the privacy guinea pig was not Kroll, but Penenberg himself, who had little to reveal. The editor, when told of the possibility of retaliation, had said: "Oh my God," he said, spilling his coffee. "We could have gotten fired. Okay, okay, investigate yourself."

Now Penenberg isn't the most reliable of reporters, his departure from Forbes was acrimonious, and this incident occurred nearly a decade ago. But this is still a pretty shocking charge, dropped almost inadvertently into a rote piece for a little-read trade magazine.

That a magazine high-up had a mistress is not of great controversy. But Forbes, at least back then, still cultivated a reputation of fearless reporting. It's disappointing to think that the magazine's hierarchy would so automatically compromise a story to avoid potential embarrassment to a colleague, or his ire.

"BSS, never one to be exactly primo to the ladies after bedding them, was nevertheless around one of them long enough to father a kid, now a teenager. And according to an outraged acquaintance of Blondie-Babe, a rising young twentysomething honey-haired actress, Blondie’s screwing Butch’s 15-year-old boy. Said amigo is trying to get B2 hauled into jail, much to the Spit-Spat boy’s great dissatisfaction, I’m sure."

Thoughts? [via Crazy Days and Nights]

"Our first encounter in the spring of 1979, was a trifle tense, predominantly due to Bear's surprising shyness, but also due to the fact that I was genuinely in awe of this one. This was not simply a fixation for Jewish patriarchs—this was Mr. Hollywood. But even more, this was a man who actually did impress me, with both his intelligence and suavity and his size, hirsuteness, daddy-hood. A hug from him was like the embrace of the entire Prussian army.

"For Bear it was a relief to take the passenger seat and pretend that he was mortal from time to time. Granted, he was still who he was, still paid all the bills, still received the curtsies and prostrations of the Streisands, the Beattys, the Nicholsons. Yet he was mine in bed.

"Bear and I, I should say, have remained friends. He became fascinated by my assorted spiritual quests, vicariously thrilled to see me grow and change. I believe he was, like my dad, envious of the freedom and the anonymity that I was still able to enjoy. Money, he always asserted, was not what life was about, and fame was hideous (he avoided it where possible)."

[From the autobiography of Gavin Dillard, the 1970s gay porn star.]

• This anchor farts a lot!
• "This person has been nicknamed 'Cranky Pants' by his caretakers."
• "This person's caretaker has had to remove carrot shreds from his lunch because he 'hates orange food - no orange food!'"
• "This person turns beet-red, balls up his fists and screams when he is read something he doesn't like."
• "This person just up and ran away from his caretakers, leaving them terrified and heartbroken."

To be honest, we're guessing Lou Dobbs for pretty much all of them. He just seems like a "cranky pants." Though the last one might have a better answer—which CNN (or Bloomberg, why not!) anchor made a habit of disappearing "without warning, not showing up or calling in for days, weeks, never to return"?

Toddler Or Anchor? I Report, You Decide [HuffPo]

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Like who's this abusive old coot? (Important hint: apparently not Scott Rudin.)

For six weeks, I worked for the worst man on the fac of the planet. He was CEO, President and Treasurer of a major company (I won't say which industry). After my second day on the job, I started looking for a new one. Here's why. The man thought nothing of cursing at everyone with a battery of four-letter words. Apparently his own child had a restraining order against him, and he frequently threw objects at his employees heads. On several occasions, said objects connected. He didn't care about being sued...just paid and kept on abusing his staff.

When I was made an offer by another firm, I called HR to tell them I was leaving at the end of the week. The old buzzard was away on a trip and wouldn't return until the following Monday. The HR rep called me back later (I guess she called him) to ask if I could please stay an extra couple of weeks. I told her that under no circumstances would I remain in a position where I was expected to accept daily verbal (and future physical) abuse from an old coot who was in serious need of psychiatric intervention. Upon witnessing my courage, four young women finally got up the gumption to walk out the door with me. Had we not left, one of us would certainly have delivered a fatal blow to his head!

I once worked for a top real estate broker in Manhattan. She was indeed PUGnacious, loud, and brash. We worked very long hours, moved multiple transactions daily, and were constantly at odds - often yelling and to the point of back-thumping. After I moved on, it took about 2 years for this experience of high, high energy and yelling to soften.

Kidding! It could be any broker, they're almost all shouty evil scum.

The Fraught World of the Personal Assistant [City Room]