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blue states lose
Adolf Hitler Taken Away from His Parents
That crazy New Jersey couple, who got mad when a ShopRite supermarket wouldn't personalize a birthday cake for their son, Adolf Hitler, had their kids taken away from them. More »
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Comment by Sarcastro: If dad (can't tell which one that is from the photo) was so hip on Hitler, why didn't he change... 13 Responses | Other threads
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blue states lose
Hipsters Have Doomed Us All
Sofia Coppola slouches in a red damask banquette so battered and torn it's practically held together by duct tape. She twists the end of her "Go Metric" t-shirt around her forefinger, staring blankly into the middle distance. Finally, as the flash of yet another polaroid camera goes off and Yo La Tengo's "Deeper Into Movies" comes on the iPod at the long abandoned DJ station, she looks pleadingly into my face and she says, "I never wanted this to happen." Hey, so did you read the one in Adbusters about how hipsters spell the end of Western civilization? Scummy pints of cloudy beer, V-necks, kaffiyehs, and fixed-gear bicycles (no cheese doodle baskets at Bushwick Country Club?), all lamented in earnest New Journalese and questionable pronoun-antecedent agreement. And in what was once an eminently read hipster lifestyle handbook. TNR apologized for the war; this was inevitable, too. More »
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Comment by Gayyker: I think hipsters might just be the solution to our energy and economic crisis. Vintage clothes: Not imported from China That... 1 Responses | Other threads
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webtards
Little Scotty Mouthbreather in Disturbing Paris BFF Bid
Icky Blue States Lose thing Little Scotty Mouthbreather is using his pull at icky American Apparel in an icky attempt to be cast in the upcoming reality TV nightmare Paris Hilton's My New BFF. A mass email sent by the leg-warmer marketeers yesterday reads, "American Apparel's heiress, Jonny Makeup is searching for a new BFF. And as luck would have it, so is a certain Miss Paris Hilton. Let's bring these kids together so they can search for boys, toys and trouble on the streets of LA." Oh, and, in case you want to go ahead and skip brunch, here's his retarded video. -
blue states lose
Shock: Celeb's Galpal Secret Scenester
You may think that George Clooney's girlfriend Sarah Larson is an innocent sweetheart, on account of how she is a former cocktail waitress now dating a rich celebrity with a few years on her, but you'd be wrong. Star tracked down secret photos that expose the real Sarah Larson as a girl who got drunk and wore bikinis. Amusingly, the photos are from Merlin Bronques' hiptard party/porn site, Last Night's Party. The real shame here is that George Clooney is dating a Blue States Lose target. [Star] -
blue states lose
Little Scotty Mouthbreather Goes Mainstream
According to an unsolicited, totally undesired MySpace message I received yesterday from Little Scotty Mouthbreather himself (full chill-inducing text after the jump), our existentially-handicapped hiptard rapper friend will be appearing along with his "group" the V.I.P. Party Boys on tomorrow's "celeb rehab" episode of the Tyra Banks Show. Tyra, in her infinite wisdom, invited Scotty and the Party Boys onto the show to discuss the manner in which "sex and drugs get tangled with fame". And by fame, he means being the object of ridicule. More »
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By Alex BlaggComment by kthnx: I actually went to one of their shows by accident one time. The treble was nearly unbearable, but it was... more » | Other threads
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By Alex BlaggComment by pensafs: I must say getting that belt off is tricky.... more » | Other threads
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By Alex BlaggComment by ellagood: wait....so blue states lose now comes in single-serve packs? this is like the time my dealer switches to $20s. more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Christmas In Hipsterville
Blue States Lose is a much-needed weekly investigation into the trends and mores of the young. Going where the cool-hunters are too afeared to tread, via the party pictures on Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, and Nicky Digital, our pal Alex Blagg teaches us about what the young have become while we were busy doing nothing.
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By Alex BlaggComment by spectatertot: @dubiouswonder: douchebaguette? (no one, will see this but i'm just catching up with stuff from my rss feeds) more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Plaid As Hell And Not Gonna Take It Anymore
A federal judge on Thursday refused, at least for now, to order a hearing at which the government would have to explain in detail the destruction of C.I.A. videotapes showing the harsh interrogation of two suspected Al Qaeda operatives. So while you're waiting for that to get resolved enjoy these pictures of idiots partying from Cobrasnake and Last Night's Party and Nicky Digital as they are mocked by Alex Blagg.
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By Alex BlaggComment by El-Sonambulo: # 1 - Tony Kusner's little brother Tiny is not as smart...and such douchebag. more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Hijinx Ensue
Blue States Lose because while their residents are running around in eyeliner and panties on the outside of their pants and SPARKLY HATS, the red state people are building houses and making industry and going to block meetings and wars! WE SUCK. Here's some pictures from the suckitude, collected from Cobrasnake and Last Night's Party and Nicky Digital by Alex Blagg!
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By Alex BlaggComment by El-Sonambulo: #1 - There's absolutely nothing funny about AIDS. But there's something absolutely funny about AIDSface. more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
"Here's Some Junkie Rubbing A Popsicle All Over Her Face While Purple Drool Drips Down Onto Her Shirt"
Blue States Lose! Blue States Lose! Party pictures, curated by Alex Blagg, of the greatest nightlife people in the world!
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By Alex BlaggComment by drivenbyboredom: those tattoos are clearly prison tattoos. i am so joining the hipster gang when i get locked up. more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
The Man Who Invented Ridiculous Hipsterdom
You would never actually go to the kind of party that websites like Ambrel, Cobrasnake, Nicky Digital, and Last Night's Party exist to take pictures of, but you sure would sit at your desk and make fun of those pictures! That's pretty cool! Alex Blagg enables you to pass judgment every week around this time.
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By Alex BlaggComment by Rachelattack: Totally forgot about VJ Jesse. Tv Carnage material for sure. more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Hipster Or Halloween Costume?
It's the spookiest time of year: The time when you can't tell a horrifically dressed club kid from a terribly dressed but otherwise normal Halloween reveler. But we can! Your friend and ours Alex Blagg trolls the photo-trolls of Ambrel, Cobrasnake, Nicky Digital, and Last Night's Party to deliver the good news: Society is just a costume! (Deep, man!)
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By Alex BlaggComment by KarateFace: 4) Hey number 4, Vincent D'Onofrio's character in The Cell called. He wants you back in his dreamworld. 5) That baby... more » | Other threads
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last night's party
Which hipster-nightlife photographer totally named Merlin Bronques threw a major hissy fit in front of the elevators at the incredibly boring Shindig party last night? "What the fuck is your problem," he shrieked, violently jabbing the 'down' button. "I told you to hold the fucking door for me!" Dude. It's just Halloween. ("Last Night's Party is so not even cool anymore," muttered a girl in the elevator. Harsh!) -
blue states lose
Hipster Millennium Multimedia Roadshow
Is there anything your Friday afternoon needs more than Alex Blagg's weekly roundup of party pictures of terrifying hipsters from Cobrasnake and Last Night's Party and Nicky Digital? How could there be?
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By Alex BlaggComment by marvel girl: #8: This is just like Sex and the City... Three hookers and their mom. more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
The Great Neon Jazzercise Gangbang
If you are old, you might not know that the youngs like to dress up in the most fantastic fashions, put their hair up, and cavort for photographers at super-cool underground parties! Then, they are documented by websites such as Last Night's Party and Cobrasnake. Furthermore! Our pal Alex Blagg searches these websites for the winners and (mostly) losers of the week! We gave this process an evocative name: Ladies and gentleman, that name is Blue States Lose.
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By Alex BlaggComment by bizasizzalizzyizzo: Congratulations, JazzerciseVirginCumShots.com is available! Thanks Blue States Lose! more » | Other threads
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why we hate us
Nerds, Terrorists Vie For YouTube Supremacy
Like the creators of The Onion before them, the sideburned jokesters responsible for those "Chad Vader" YouTube videos are trying as hard as they can to escape from Madison, Wisconsin. They're represented by William Morris! They're flying out to New York to participate in something called "Battle of the Internet Superstars" (uggghh)! And as long as they keep pumping out lame Star Wars parodies, people will continue trying to figure out how to make money off of them. Is it wrong, though, that we'd kinda rather subscribe to the YouTube channel of militant North Carolinian jihadist Samir Khan? More »
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By PareeneComment by TimeWarnerRhymeAnaheim: Look: it's October 16th, and though it won't(!) rain or anything, and it's still 78 degrees around here where I... more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Nightlife Of The Living Dumb
"In another version of its utility," wrote Susan Sontag in On Photography, "the camera record justifies. A photograph passes for incontrovertible proof that a given thing happened. The picture may distort; but there is always a presumption that something exists, or did exist, which is like what's in the picture." UNTIL NOW, lady! Here's your weekly roundup of amazing impossible photography from amazing impossible places, courtesy of your host Alex Blagg and the wonderful, horrible, horriful party photographers of Last Night's Party, Cobrasnake, and Ambrel!
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By Alex BlaggComment by El-Sonambulo: #1- is what happens when black effeminate gaydudes listen to beyonce's "to the left" too much. more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Smile Like You Mean It
You know how every week Alex Blagg takes a look at the ridiculous hipster party photos from Cobrasnake and Last Night's Party and mocks the people in them? Did you notice that every week, even though it's essentially the same post each time, someone has to come up with a new and different introductory paragraph? You didn't, did you? You just skipped down past the jump and started making fun of the hipsters. Well, you know what? Screw you, you ungrateful bastards. Someone on this end NEVER HAS TO DO IT AGAIN, because it's his last day, and he could not be happier about it. What? Oh, yeah, hey, it's Blue States Lose!
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By Alex BlaggComment by The Glad Family of Products: #3: I see this guy every time I drop acid and watch Will and Grace. I think his... more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Does Anyone Speak Hipsterese?
Friday's bout of server intransigence brought about several tragedies, but the biggest loss was Alex Blagg's weekly critique of the silly hipster photos pockmarking the face of The Cobrasnake and Last Night's Party. But fear not, kids, we seem to be up and running this morning. Ladies and gentlemen, it's a very special Monday edition of Blue States Lose!
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By Alex BlaggComment by The Default Attorney: #1 Thanks for dropping by the estate sale. I have to say, that although that top is actually the gold... more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
The Ghost of MisShapes Future
What does it profit a man if he loseth his soul but hasn't gaineth'd a Friday afternoon gazing upon pictures of tarted-up hipsters? Nothing, that's what. So why dostn't thou join Alex Blagg on his soul-degrading tour of Last Night's Party and Cobrasnake? After all, when the Lamb broke the Seventh Seal, there was only silence in heaven for about half an hour. Until one of the Horsemen shouted out, "Hey, you guys! It's Alex Blagg with Blue States Lose!"
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By Alex BlaggComment by fwah-mawvaze: And oh, shit! Astro [#6] cuts my hair (and does a damn fine job). I'm two strikes into being on the... more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Deleted Scenesters
In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters. And God said, Let there be hipsters: and there were hipsters. And God saw the hipsters, that they were stupidly posing in photos for websites like Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, and Misshapes, and God said, Let there be someone to mock the hipsters: and there was Alex Blagg. And God looked down upon what He had made, and God said, Ladies and gentleman, it's Blue States Lose!
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By Alex BlaggComment by smalltownwitch: #2: As far as pictures of Chris Corner the Childcatcher go, this one's gotta be the best. Look at that... more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
A Parade Of Retardation
What's better than a skateboard race in MoMA, better than a naked hipster olympic javelin toss, better than that time you went out barefoot for a cigarette late one August night and immediately felt a big fat slug go *squish* between your toes? Why it's Alex Blagg's weekly tour of the youngster party pics on Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party and Nicky Digital. That's the sexy horrible summer feeling that is Blue States Lose! More »
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By Alex BlaggComment by areiten: #6 looks like a fucking lamp. My mind is officially blown. more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Enhance Your Next Corporate Event With The DJ Artistry Of The Misshapes!
Consider the moth: It knows that it will be incinerated by the flame, but it is nonetheless unable to avoid its flickering intensity and fatal embrace. Much like that proverbial insect, Alex Blagg is drawn to the photos of toxic hipsters engaging in their bizarre rituals at Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, and, of course, Misshapes. Feel the heat? Prepare to be sizzled: It's Blue States Lose!
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By Alex BlaggComment by mr.snarky: Did anyone else notice that their book has three forewords? more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
More Daft Than Punk
"Of course," said the great modernist painter and photographer Man Ray, "there will always be those who look only at technique, who ask 'how', while others of a more curious nature will ask 'why'. Personally, I have always preferred inspiration to information." It is in that spirit that Alex Blagg finds inspiration from the photos of vapid hipsters wasting space at Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, and Misshapes. Ready to be inspired? Good: It's Blue States Lose!
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By Alex BlaggComment by Livddisaster: #7 - Is that one of the new converse ads? Converse are so cool that you could get attacked for... more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Blue States Lollapalooza
As the great Impressionist Paul Gauguin said, "Life being what it is, one seeks revenge." It is in that spirit that Alex Blagg seeks revenge against the impressions of humorously clad hipsters enjoying themselves at Last Night's Party and Misshapes. Guess what, kids? It's time for Blue States Lose!
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By Alex BlaggComment by shesaidwhat: #6. retarded. yes. ironic. not so sure. #5. adorable/pathetic same dif. #2. "so much to not understand..." so very, very much...... more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Brain Terrorism
We've often heard it said that Alex Blagg is the modern day Clement Greenberg, a sharp, incisive critic who turns his assessments of the party photos of from Last Night's Party, Cobrasnake, and the rest of them into a larger statement on society as it is currently formulated and what it means for us all. Okay, we haven't heard it said that often, but maybe if we start that buzz up people will buy into it. Either way, it's Blue States Lose!
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By Alex BlaggComment by the earl grey: 8. bronques isnt really turned on by scabby bathroom grotesqueries like this, or is he? hes spent 3+ years showing... more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Vagina Face Rage
Since the first caveman made the first wall-painting of greasy-haired loners trying to prove how different they were from other Neanderthals by getting together at ridiculous cave parties and wearing the same retarded outfits, man has found comfort in poking fun of hipster party pictures. Our modern cave paintings come in the form of photos from Last Night's Party, Cobrasnake, and Misshapes. Alex Blagg is our 21st century equivalent of those early mocking cavemen. Join us on the quest for fire—better known as Blue States Lose!
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By Alex BlaggComment by Smackdown: Enthusiastic satanic oral sex is the new celibacy. more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Scantily-Clad Hipster Babes Eating Fried Chicken
The great Henri Cartier-Bresson once said that "To photograph is to hold one's breath, when all faculties converge to capture fleeting reality. It's at that precise moment that mastering an image becomes a great physical and intellectual joy." Of course, you never caught him hanging around events like the ones featured on Last Night's Party, Cobrasnake, and Misshapes. Alex Blagg sifts through the wreckage of our modern-day joy. That's right, kids, it's that precise moment known as Blue States Lose!
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By Alex BlaggComment by Butras: @ BITCHYENGLISHMAJOR : I have reason to believe that kids in Salt Lake are already finding their way towards hiptardness... more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Surviving The Game
Once again, Alex Blagg ruins his eyesight gazing at the party pictures from Last Night's Party, Cobrasnake, and probably some other ones. At this point there's very little more we can say that has already been said. But that's okay. Sometimes silence speaks the most loudest. We guess what we're saying is, hey, it's Blue States Lose!
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By Alex BlaggComment by El-Sonambulo: #2- Oh, BSL, I must laugh and gaffaw in your face. Your mainstream-nisity has failed you in recognizing the latest... more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
The Terrible People Convention
Each week, Alex Blagg stares into the death-hole that are the party pictures of Last Night's Party, Cobrasnake, and the like. There is magic in these hipster parties! A dark, steamy variety of Stevie Nicks on coke hallucinating sort of magic. Come aboard!
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By Alex BlaggComment by JanHammered: strangely, the man hugging captain big balls, is l.a. based rapper andre legacy, who raps about girls, drugs, and his... more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Hipster Or Homeless
After last week's sorry dereliction of duty, Alex Blagg returns to his post as the man in charge of mocking the folks in the party photos from Misshapes and Last Night's Party. It's so nice to have you back where you belong! Also? It's Blue States Lose!
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By Alex BlaggComment by bernat: Hipstery, homelessness: not mutually exclusive. more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
The Cream Of The Crop
It's a very special edition of everyone's favorite hipster-hating feature, Blue States Lose! And by very special, we mean that Alex Blagg punked out on us today, so rather than scan endless photos from the Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, MisShapes, and wherever the hell else Blagg usually looks ourselves, we've selected some of the greatest moments from the column thus far. See them again for the very first time. Ladies and gentleman, it's the office picks of the Best of Blue States Lose!
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blue states lose
You're A MisShape So Start Dressing Like It
This week, the strain of mocking the hipsters in the pictures from Misshapes, The Cobrasnake, and Last Night's Party finally causes Alex Blagg to snap. The result? A concise drama that recalls Albee at the height of his powers. Please take your seats, the show is about to begin. Turn your cellphones to vibrate, ladies and gentlemen. It's Blue States Lose!
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By Alex BlaggComment by phil anderson: Based on pictures alone I'd probably rather be at Misshapes than be any way involved with Blakely's party... more » | Other threads
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blue states lose
Obscenities On A T-Shirt
Remember last week when we tried to shake things up by giving you some thumbnails of the actual hipsters Alex Blagg gets paid to pillory? Well, enough of you complained that we've decided we're going right back to plain text! Enjoy your mockery of the party pictures from MisShapes and Ambrel without any spoilers. We've learned our lesson: Never try to change anything. Especially Blue States Lose!
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blue states lose
Moronically Ever After
Ladies and germs, Blue States Lose presents to you the top ten Misshapes, Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, and possibly Ambrel party photo moments of the week. Your host Alex Blagg knows exactly what sort of humans you must not see to retain your sanity. Pity the real victim—yourself! The eyes! They burn! Take that, Kansas City!
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blue states lose
Space Alien Makeup
We are currently sitting around on our rapidly-expanding asses waiting for Alex Blagg to finish up his weekly hipster mockery so we can get the hell out of here. We're not going to bother checking to see if the links work or even read the thing, but you can assume it's a bunch of party pictures from Misshapes, The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, and possibly Ambrel. Who knows? By the time you read this, we'll be well into our third bourbon at Shark Bar. Anyway, what were we saying? Oh yeah, it's Blue States Lose!
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By Alex BlaggComment by El-Sonambulo: I saw Dipshits-ter No. 3 (Little Scotty) walking west at Union Square Park last week. He smiled for a second... more » | Other threads
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icons of our age
One-Half Nelson Speaks!
Homosexual bloggers Queerty sit down with Blue States Lose fashion icon and party monster One-Half Nelson.I always try to show a little piece of myself. Maybe some idea that I had or maybe it's just me getting dressed and my mood plays into it. There are certain days when I feel very dark and, you know, if I'm down or there's some sort of exciting thing in my life. As far as a reaction from the viewer - really, in a response, I mean even negative responses - I get into all the spectrum of responses. That just shows that my work is hitting many different facets and many different people.
Apparently you people can't get enough of this shit, so who are we to stop you? Enjoy! More » -
blue states lose
One Ironic Elvis Fan Can Be Wrong
Lord almighty, I feel my temperature rising. These party pictures from The Cobrasnake, Misshapes, and Last Night's Party are burning right through my soul. Alex Blagg's gonna set me on fire. My brain is flaming, I don't know which way to go. It's just a hunk, a hunk of Blue States Lose.
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By Alex BlaggComment by KarateFace: #8 She got the golden ticket for that hyperbaric chamber at an EMF concert back in '87, and just got... more » | Other threads
blue states lose
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Transformers blows up this weekend. Need to know more? io9 gets down and dirty with the superbots.
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