Oooh, look at him! President-elect Barack Obama is on vacation in Hawaii right now and a stressful campaign and glorious victory seem to have done a body good. He's trimmer than he was in August!

Remember when Janet Jackson ripped her shirt off at the Superbowl and pressed her breasts against every television camera in the stadium and children wept blood for weeks (some died!) and God thunderously shook his head and sent us six more years of war and hurricane floods? It was a national tragedy to be sure, but…