Borders, a seller of printed "books," is trying to trick America's youth into thinking that buying popular "books" about vampires is cooler than buying record albums of hip hop, for example. Yea right.

Last month, shares in the New York Times Co. dropped below the $4 cost of a Sunday paper, and shares in Citibank fell below the cost of the bank's ATM fee.

Hedge fund manager William Ackerman owns a 30 percent stake in Borders — but he doesn't want to anymore. The founder of Pershing Square Capital Management told reporters he thinks Amazon.com should purchase the bricks-and-mortar bookstore: "Amazon could buy the company for about $400 million to get those locations…

Borders Bookstores will each soon contain two 37-inch TVs to expand advertising opportunities within the stores—just like Jack-in-the-Box! BordersTV, as the platform is called, won't be showing reality programming or soft-core porn, but it sort of feels like that—can no one stay in business selling books without also…

So Borders is having a contest for its 30,000 employees where they are encouraged to submit their manuscripts to their employer, which might then deign to make a book out of them! A "panel of judges at the corporate office" will award "a book deal including the full support of Borders merchandising and marketing…