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Ted Nugent Is the New Mike Tyson

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Mama Penguino
05/15/09

In reply to Ted Nugent Is the New Mike Tyson
I blame/credit this album (Cat Scratch Fever) for the loss of my innocence regarding male masturbatory techniques. Mind you, I was but a babe (so to speak) so I still wasn't sure why boys were beating (?) their meat (gross!), but thanks to dear Uncle Ted, I was then aware they were up to some sort of meat-beating hijinx.
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SidAndFinancy
05/15/09

In reply to Ted Nugent Is the New Mike Tyson
Nugent is Tyson?

Put up your Amboy Dukes!

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scroll_lock
05/15/09

In reply to Ted Nugent Is the New Mike Tyson
Ted's the zenith of redneck idiocy. Can't he take his guns, go back to his brilliant oeuvre of "Wango Tango" et al and take some meds? I thought people knew better than to taunt the challenged.
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Ron_Obvious
05/15/09

@scroll_lock: I'll wager that the drug Uncle Ted is skipping is Aricept.
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scroll_lock
05/15/09

@Ron_Obvious: If only he could remember where he put it.
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Katcrystal
05/15/09

In reply to Ted Nugent Is the New Mike Tyson
He's from my hometown in Michigan. Had a gun store and was loathed by many, people would cut him off in traffic and generally regarded him as the local fucktard.

He does, in fact, talk much more intelligently than he writes. He would do the occasional column for our local newspaper, which would consist of one run-on sentence after another of complete bullshit and grammatical errors.

It's a good thing he went into music. Otherwise he would have been one of those guys who shot up 20 people at the mall.
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bluebears
05/15/09

@Katcrystal: I thought he was still living in MI? Or at least thats what VH1 led me to believe...
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City_Dater
05/15/09

In reply to Ted Nugent Is the New Mike Tyson
Martin should have tried telling Nugent: "it would be great if a lot more women and minorities carried guns, since they are the citizens most likely to require protection."
But perhaps this would be best saved for a television interview, the better to watch his crazy head explode.
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kathotdog
05/15/09

In reply to Ted Nugent Is the New Mike Tyson
Martin should have told Ted that the only thing he learned in college was that Ted didn't fight for his country in Vietnam.
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Kobayashi Maru
05/15/09

@kathotdog: Oh, right! What's the story, he shit his pants in front of the draft board and tried to get a section 8 or something, isn't it?
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ADismalScience
05/15/09

In reply to Ted Nugent Is the New Mike Tyson
I hate that argument. Look, gun nuts - your stupid pistol or pathetic little rifle is nothing. If "the government" wants to Bataan Death March you, they will Bataan Death March you, and there isn't a damn thing your honky guerrilla ass can do about it. By all means, fire your .22 at an armored column or hide behind your house while a gunship with three spectrums of infrared filtration takes you out from thousands of feet in the air. Your little compensation device isn't worth a damn against a modern fighting force, so just drop that piece of shit argument.
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shostakobitch
05/15/09

@ADismalScience: yeah those vietcong were powerless in the face of american might . . .
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E. H. Cotton
05/15/09

@ADismalScience: I've got $30,000 worth of guns at home, I can't even get mad at this discussion. Let me tell you a story, son, mmmmm, about the ringing in the canyon walls. I can't be sure, but I think I'm on the right side of history.
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bluebears
05/15/09

@ADismalScience: I can't believe how evil and/or deranged you are. for shame!
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Satyrica
05/15/09

@ADismalScience: This is a very weak criticism. Governments don't go from normal to oppressive in one fell swoop; no gun nut thinks any private arsenal is going to do anything against tanks and gunships. (Though they would laugh at the idea of anyone considering a .22 to be a defensive weapon.) What they DO think is that an armed populace would be a deterrent to the gradual erosion of civil liberties, e.g. Soviet style - random arrests and "disappearances." And despite not even owning a gun myself, I can see their point. Why are people so gung-ho about the rest of the Bill of Rights, but so quick to dismiss the 2nd Amendment?
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shostakobitch
05/15/09

@Satyrica: i tried to make that point with sarcasm but failed. why do i have to not own a gun again? because the government has a helicopter that can see heat?

i get that the motor city madman is a total assclown but by your argument i shouldn't give up my .22 - i should buy stinger missiles.
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Kobayashi Maru
05/15/09

In reply to Ted Nugent Is the New Mike Tyson
He's right, you know- all those evil moments in human history could have been stopped by Ted Nugent firing his flaming arrows in his loincloth.
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Mama Penguino
05/15/09

@Kobayashi Maru: No shit. Just imagine trying to get him on the train to Dachau.
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depardoo
05/15/09

In reply to Ted Nugent Is the New Mike Tyson
I can't tell whether he is truly deranged or just putting everyone on, all the time. I vote for the former. He's always been a gun nut with a huge ego.
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notubob
05/15/09

In reply to Ted Nugent Is the New Mike Tyson
Why would anyone interview Ted Nugent?
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lurkystars
05/15/09

@ibobunot: I have to ask myself this WAY too often. He still lives here in Michigan, and he gets WAY more air time than he deserves on the local radio and TV stations.
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TRexstasy
05/15/09

@lurkystars: Michigan? I thought he lives on a 300 acre game preserve in Texas where he takes down live prey like antelopes and wildebeast with nothing but his bare hands and a nail clipper.
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Mama Penguino
05/15/09

@TRexstasy: Huh. I had no idea he'd been to cosmetology school.
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