Is this guy's ad that douchey? He seems like every other shy and smart person who's lonely and trying to get a companion. He sounds like he's just trying to talk himself up while simultaneously trying to come off as humble and down to earth. Like everyone on CL. Cliche-ridden and all, I like his ad. What he said about adoption and being okay with becoming a stepdad sounds sweet. I hope the poor guy never finds out that his ad got on Gawker.
I do question his indirect put-down of effeminate guys altho' it's possible that he was just being very direct about his preferences and was not intending to insult femmy guys.
Translation: I'm full of self-loathing about my homosexuality, and while I fancy myself a straight appearing guy's guy, I actually lisp like the queeniest bees in the hive.
@Wrapitup: He should, yes, but there's something off-putting about the ad itself. Much like jimstoic, were i single and in NYC (3k miles away, too--it'd be odd if we were neighbors), i'd think about writing. All the pieces are there, but there's something about that ad that makes me cringe, and i can't put my finger on it.
Seriously, though...a PERFUME CRITIC? I mean, that's what he does? Aren't there customer reviews on sephora.com that sort of handle that niche of reporting?
@QueenAlice: Yes, it's a niche, but a heck of a lot of artistry goes into some (repeat: SOME) of the perfumes out there, and the amount of money perfume generates is astounding (it's what keeps most couture houses afloat).
Perfume criticism is at least as serious as fashion or wine criticism, which, granted, may not be saying much, but at least it has company in the realm of the frou-frou. And some of the writing is pretty damn good; Chandler Burr's not bad (his depressing ad notwithstanding), and Luca Turin and Tania Sanchez (look 'em up) are fantastic.
@LasVegasPhil: That's actually a very good idea. Most of the readership is in NYC, right? Surely someone would be willing to take one for the team and then report back? I'd volunteer, but i'm on the Left Coast. Maybe we could set-up a PayPal account to help with expenses, like therapy afterward.
I'm always creeped out when people use those Sears Portrait Studio/yearbook/'from the back of my novel' pictures in their ads. I don't know why, it just makes people come off as trying very hard to be omgsincerez I guess. Throw up some crappy candids from your best friend's stag party like everyone else already!
That said, he looks like my dad's accountant, Albert.
@QueenAlice: Too true, although I will give him credit for the fact that he isn't using a pic where he is turning his head quite a ways towards the camera in order to make it look like he has a discernable jawline. Or standing behind a large piece of furniture with only his head and shoulders visible, or any of the other photo tricks guys use to make themselves look halfway decent. That being said, this is not the pic to use to attract someone who would share one's life. A more casual pic, maybe in something a little body-conscious (sex is a part of all this) and a freaking SMILE!
@robmorsexxx: I don't mean to come off as rude, since I don't know this person - but his ad does NOT in any way scream 'sex' to me. It doesn't even lightly hint at sex. What it says to me is "Uptight writer with desperately adolescent quirks in language seeking hand holding, cheek stroking beta-male to put up with my tantrums about my hair loss and shop for checkered shirts." Then again I'm not a gay man.
@QueenAlice: LOL very good points and quite true, but since he is gay man, sex enters into everything. It just does.
I'm wondering that if he does indeed find that guy with all those admirable traits, will that guy be willing to tolerate the ad author's quirks. My gut tells me no-when someone goes looking for and only accepts perfection, well, perfection has a nasty habit of not returning the feeling.
Honestly, from my experience, It hink this guy is chasing his tail. I wish him luck-I wish everyone luck in finding love-but I just don't see it playing out like he wants.
He's a very, VERY nice guy, despite that he used "solid" twice in this ad. Very smart, very sweet. So... there being only so many homosexuals in New York City, I was of course once set up on a blind date with him. (And therefore I will keep this item blind as well.) This was, oh, early 2008? Late 2007? And so I called him. He grilled me. And then--AND THEN! After quite the interrogation, he told me he'd gone on a date with a guy like two days before--gone on ONE DATE with a guy--and therefore was unavailable for dating anyone else. It was like an episode of Sex and the City. Like, I'm being pre-rejected by someone who clearly has a radically unusual, or at least wildly different, set of standards and understandings of the world? It was one of those moments where you hang up the phone and think: should I just get myself castrated? Or is it time to move to Nebraska already? (But as Sex and the City always reminds us, it is always darkest before the dawn....)
In any event, I wish him the best in his apparently on-going search for love.
@Choire: It's Thomas Friedman, isn't it? A shonda, his lying about his age like that. Oh, and the wife and kids bit. And I'm sure you're a catch, Choire.
Don't go Nebraskan 'cos ass is there for the askin'.
@Choire: Set up with him, huh? So much for my suggestion he do what the rest of us do when we're not just looking to score, and that's rely on the judgment of friends. Maybe you offended this person somehow, and hence the set-up?
He just wasn't into you (even before meeting you).
Choire-rhymes-with-story,
It was very gentlemanly of you not to ID him, even though now it's moot. Strain that it is, I'd like to believe that decent behavior gets repaid every once in a long while.
@Buenavista: It's like sending postcards when you're on vacay (Look at me! I have the time and resources to travel! Suck it, bitch!). It's a way of bragging without really bragging, unless you pay even the slightest attention to details, in which case it's just tiresome.
@Hydroceph: It's a typo, what he meant was "I've had great luck meeting guys who are serious about having anonymous sex in Hell's Kitchen in the next 30 minutes."
@robmorsexxx: Isn't it? I mean, he should be ringing my bell with those details, but gawd, I just wish he's go away, far away, maybe to one of those 60 or so countries he's visited.
12/26/08
I do question his indirect put-down of effeminate guys altho' it's possible that he was just being very direct about his preferences and was not intending to insult femmy guys.
12/26/08
Translation: I'm full of self-loathing about my homosexuality, and while I fancy myself a straight appearing guy's guy, I actually lisp like the queeniest bees in the hive.
NEXT.
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And how humiliating must it be to find your personal ad being dissected, deconstructed, and abused online? Because you know someone's told him.
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Perfume criticism is at least as serious as fashion or wine criticism, which, granted, may not be saying much, but at least it has company in the realm of the frou-frou. And some of the writing is pretty damn good; Chandler Burr's not bad (his depressing ad notwithstanding), and Luca Turin and Tania Sanchez (look 'em up) are fantastic.
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"I'd like to have kids, probably by adoption"
Is there some new medical miracle in the works?
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That said, he looks like my dad's accountant, Albert.
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I'm wondering that if he does indeed find that guy with all those admirable traits, will that guy be willing to tolerate the ad author's quirks. My gut tells me no-when someone goes looking for and only accepts perfection, well, perfection has a nasty habit of not returning the feeling.
Honestly, from my experience, It hink this guy is chasing his tail. I wish him luck-I wish everyone luck in finding love-but I just don't see it playing out like he wants.
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In any event, I wish him the best in his apparently on-going search for love.
12/26/08
Don't go Nebraskan 'cos ass is there for the askin'.
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He just wasn't into you (even before meeting you).
Choire-rhymes-with-story,
It was very gentlemanly of you not to ID him, even though now it's moot. Strain that it is, I'd like to believe that decent behavior gets repaid every once in a long while.
Happy Holidays.
S.J.
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And it's a good thing CL doesn't charge by the word, especially the trite and hackneyed variety.
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