Today was the day for statements to be made, Glenn. Nothing more. The questioning of Sonia Sotomayor will commence tomorrow. But we do actually agree with you on one thing—Lindsey Graham is a bit of a worm.

Video via Media Matters

The question with Cohen's 'Bruno' act is how much longer is this sort of act funny, if it even is any longer? How much longer can he go around acting as the embodiment of every awful stereotype of gay men before he wears out his welcome with both straights and gays? Personally, each time I see a 'Bruno' press appearance, typically filled with furniture humping and crotch thrusts to someone's face, the less enthusiasm I have for seeing the film. It's just not as funny to me anymore. Certainly I'm not the only straight feeling this way?

Yes, Glenn Beck, fresh from his "Common Sense" comedy tour through America's heartland, just can't seem to wrap his wee brain around why the continued proliferation of non-biodegradable products mass-produced for little more than human convenience might be something we should at least consider not doing any longer, if only out of respect for the other species we share the planet with.

And speaking of plastic bags, watching this clip might actually compel you to place one over your head. Consider yourself warned.

Ever since Beck was publicly neutered by the ladies of The View last week, we've found ourselves thinking a lot about him (So sad!). Specifically, we've found ourselves thinking a lot about how what little cultural and political relevance he'd held prior to his appearance on The View pretty much went poof after the cringe-worthy evisceration he was subject to on the show. We've been thinking that maybe we should just ignore him, that if we did perhaps he'd just go away?

Whatever, it's just something we're pondering, but it's hard to ignore the fact that the guy's deranged rantings pull ridiculous ratings at Fox during his time slot, and that there are legions of Americans who actually look to him for ideological guidance instead of just slapstick entertainment, which sadly makes him someone we have to follow.

And thanks to Gawker intern Krutika Mallikarjuna for pulling this clip for us!

Oh, see, what happened is, AIG chairman Edward Liddy was called before a House panel today to be shamed by everyone in congress. Most of them are still wrapping their heads around what happened to break everything, but they are pretty sure it involves BONUSES, and also some of them listened to This American Life and so they know allll about the "Credit Default Swaps."

Then Queens congressman Gary Ackerman said something amusing, but DON'T LAUGH, IT'S NOT FUNNY.

Thanks Mike Byhoff and intern Blair Nelson for compiling these.

• Don't worry! In these times when Jim Cramer has single-handedly robbed you blind and stolen your house, Broadway theatre still soldiers on. For example, West Side Story is performing well, grossing over $2 million for the two weeks it's been in previews.
• Plus big stars are filling the stages this spring, from Susan Sarandon to James Gandolfini to Joan Allen to Jane Fonda herself. The traitorous actress got pretty solid notices for her performance as a dying Beethoven scholar in Moises Kaufman's limp-sounding play 33 Variations.
• Been a lady in war, or just curious what female soldiers' experiences have been like? Go check out The Lonely Soldier Monologues (Women at War in Iraq), at Theater for the New City in the E-Vill. Supposedly parts of it are "revalatory and disturbing." I, for one, don't wanna sit around watchin' a bunch of gals cookin' Army food! Right??
• If you think your parents are clowns (they are), meet Lorenzo Pisoni, whose pops actually was one. He discusses what it was like growing up in that strange sort of household, and does some of the routines, in his one man show at MTC, Humor Abuse. His physicality is, evidently, "breathtaking."
• Well, here you go. Melissa Gilbert, who played Laura on the O.G. Little House On the Prairie TV show, will be playing Ma in a tour of the stage musical based on Laura Ingalls Wilder's famous book series. Set to begin after the show a ends five week run at the Paper Mill in NJ, the 30-city extravaganza starts in Minnesota, where it first premiered. (Patty Noons, if you're reading this, I hope you made the tour.)
• The new Catch Me If You Can musical, based on the movie, with music by Scott Wittman and Mark Shaiman and a book by Terrence McNally, will premiere this summer at the increasingly-popular-for-tryouts 5th Avenue Theater in Seattle. Cutiepants Aaron Tveit will play the Leonardo DiCaprio part, with seasoned veteran Norbert Leo Butz stepping into the Tom Hanks role. If the whole production basically just looks like the opening credits sequence, then I can forgive the show for being yet another movie adaptation.
• Casting has begun for the New Georges and the Hip-Hop Theater Festival's co-production Angela's Mixtape, a play by Eisa Davis. You may have seen Davis as the mother in the terrific Passing Strange, on both East and West coasts, or as Bubbles' sister on The Wire.
• Go see Martha Clarke's dance (sort of) piece Garden of Earthly Delights at Minetta Lane before it closes on March 29th.
• In other regional news: Chicago's Theo Ubique Theatre Company is apparently doing good things with a "vest-pocket-sized" production of Evita. Go see the "huge talents" at the No Ext Cafe, in Roger's Park. In LA, the Road Theatre Company's well-reviewed The Bird and Mr. Banks at the Lankershim Arts Center just got extended to May 2nd. Now you have even more opportunities to see Bernard from Lost (also known as Sam Anderson) as a murderous CPA with a bird obsession. If you want to go see something pretty, but flawed, in Boston, head over the Huntington for Two Men of Florence, a play about Galileo that has a "beautiful set" if not a moving script.

Enjoy.

Apparently CNN put Palin on a list with Spitzer and John Edwards and assorted other scandalized political characters and everyone was scandalized by this and then CNN scandalously had to take Palin off this made-up, unimportant list, and apologize to her, for fuck's sake, because this is journalism in America, these days. Greta, who still feels indebted to the Palins for being allowed on the snowmobile, feels their apology efforts fall scandalously short:

1/ why didn’t CNN PUBLICLY apologize for this one? they sure unfairly trashed her publicly on that list….should not exposure of the apology equal the round the world exposure of the unfair trashing? That is what is done in court - you do what is necessary to make the person whole in the damage done to the person…and then it is over.

2/ a producer? why did she get stuck doing the dirty work on this one? why didn’t someone higher up the corporate food chain send the message of apology if CNN really means it? the job stature of the person making the apology can mean much. This IS the Governor of the largest state…a former candidate for VP….and the trashing went world wide and was really lousy….

Yes the CEO of CNN is now responsible for PUBLICLY APOLOGIZING for offending any politician through LISTICLE. Clowns. Everywhere, there are clowns.

• Celebrity Circus [NBC]