Hasselbeck's masterwork has the catchier-sounding title The G-Free Diet: A Gluten Free Survival Guide, but what lies within bears a wealth of similarity to Living, Hassett and her attorneys claim.

TMZ has gotten their mitts on the legal documents, which detail the many suspicious likenesses between the two books. Chapter names, phrasing, and content, etc. Some examples:

So, hm! Not exactly smoking guns, but warm ones perhaps. While we're not terribly certain just how many ways there are to write a book about Celiac Disease and diet, we're also not sure that Hasselbeck (although she is a Boston College graduate!) has the wherewithal to come up with anything on her own steam, unless it's some bird-language rave about Sarah Palin.

Anyone read her book in full? Or Hassett's? Let us know!

CIA: Use "intelligence" as a euphemism for doing who knows what.
Bankers: Use "finance" as a euphemism for doing who knows what.


The image associated with this post is best viewed using a browser.CIA: Train to ingratiate themselves with sources of information.
Bankers: Train to ingratiate themselves with sources of revenue.

CIA: Did cocaine with Colombians and spent all night partying with hookers in a drug lord's villa. It was a mission.
Bankers: Did cocaine with Colombians and spent all night partying with hookers in a Murray Hill co-op. It was Tuesday.

CIA: Have been known to foster regime change in far-flung foreign countries to bolster the interests of the US military-industrial complex.
Bankers: Ditto.

The image associated with this post is best viewed using a browser.CIA: Hunt down moles.
Bankers: Hunt down the city's best molé sauce; price is no object, just bring us our fucking food, Pedro.

CIA: Will ride through the rugged mountains of Afghanistan on horseback to make contact with tribal leaders.
Bankers: Wife once suggested some sort of "adventure vacation" crap. I was like, I don't work 100 hours a week to spend my vacation in some tent in the desert getting pissed on by a camel. Go shopping, why don't you, I have a client meeting tonight.

We predict success!
[NYP]

The historical precedent hasn't escaped profilers of modern celebrity. A gallery in the New York Times Magazine of 52 incoming Obama staffers echoes Vanity Fair's 1993 Annie Liebowitz photo layout of the Little Rock oddballs, Democratic upstarts, and Washington insiders who surrounded Bill Clinton. Note the parallels:

Charlie Ledley, the 18-year-old intern who ran Clinton's hotel operation during the Democratic National Convention, 1993

Eugene Kang, a 24-year-old special assistant to Obama, 2009

Patti Solis, Hillary Clinton's 27-year-old scheduler, 1993

Jackie Norris, Michelle Obama's 38-year-old chief of staff, 2009

George Stephanopoulos, 31-year-old White house communications director, 1993

Jon Favreau, Obama's 27-year-old speechwriter, 2009

Rahm Emanuel, Clinton's 33-year-old campaign-finance director, 1993

Rahm Emanuel, Obama's 49-year-old White House chief of staff, 2009

(Photos by Annie Liebowitz/Vanity Fair and Nadav Kander/New York Times)

International Cosmo has used the same few pouty, one-leg-out Jolie shots for many of her international covers. They just kinda Photoshop a new dress color on, maybe move the arm position a bit. (The new German issue is identical to the shot used on Italian Cosmo in October 2003.) But they're all essentially the same couple of alien, hyper-airbrushed images. Take a look at a gallery below.

Bernie Madoff: Clearly the elder Madoff is George Bluth, Sr., the patriarch of a once-proud family that now lies in tatters because of his highly illegal wheelings and dealings. Of course in Madoff's case it was just a sad old Ponzi scheme, whereas with George it was lots and lots of fraud and lying and maybe selling of things to the Iraqis. And now Madoff is on house arrest in his fancy apartment just like George was!

Ruth Madoff: Not exactly a drunken, scathing Lucille Bluth type, Ruth is actually maybe more like Dr. Tobias Funke, who frequently has funny ideas about what he wants to do for work (Blue Man Group!). Because, you know, Ruth does wacky things like writing kosher cookbooks! Plus, you can totally tell that she's a never-nude.

The Sons, Mark and Andrew Madoff: These fellas probably (hopefully) have a little Buster, Gob, and Lindsay in them, but right now they mostly seem Michael-esque. Frustrated and angry with their crime-doing father, they have chosen to basically ignore any needs he might have, like a bail bond. Heck they even turned their guilty papa in to the police which—gasp!—also happened on the show.

We hope that a Steve Holt, a Kitty Sanchez, and a Lucille Austero are all lurking in the shadows, waiting to spice up the Madoff story even more.

"Since I have a dog and blond hair, that must mean we're alike. It's a dumb thing to say. I don't think that makes us similar," Lively tells the new issue of Seventeen. "I don't know her, but I don't like being compared to anyone by somebody who doesn't know me. I'm my own person. I don't go to clubs, I don't party, I don't dance on tables and I don't like sex tapes."

She doesn't like sex tapes? Has journalism really sunk so far that the reporter for Seventeen (which I can now read and get all the references) couldn't bother interjecting to get some clarification on that question? I mean, does she mean that she doesn't like "making" them (which would be a bummer) or "watching" them? Because there's one little fella out there with a sex tape that sure could use the extra cashflow if Lively were to pick up a copy of his work. But sex tape inquiries aside, we feel for Lively, we really do. We have no idea why anyone would confuse an actress who rose to prominence by playing a tall, blonde, sexually promiscuous and often times inebriated socialite would get confused for a tall, blonde, sexually promiscuous and often times inebriated socialite. Here's hoping that movie about a magical pair of elastic-waisted denim pantaloons helps Lively break out of the typecasting rut that Hollywood has pegged her into. It's hard out there for a starlet, it really is.

• I'M NO PARIS [NY Post]