Please welcome back ConFonz, the man who goes to technology trade conferences so Valleywag doesn't have to. The Conference Fonzerelli, a veteran of many OpenWorld conferences, thinks Oracle has pumped up its image this year. The show is much more huggy-touchy-feely-bloggery. Despite the fact that most Oracle employees…
CONFONZ AT THE WEB 2.0 SUMMIT — While the rest of the world prepares for Halloween, there was a significantly scarier sight on display yesterday at the Palace Hotel. You truly know the web 2.0 "revolution" is over when the suits outnumber the geeks. Granted, the Palace isn't exactly a geek haven. And the pricing of…
CONFONZ — The Conference Fonzie was certain that Britain was known for its manners. Those beloved British boxing boys are supposed to be well behaved and polite in all social situations, aren't they? Unfortunately, this doesn't seem to apply to imported Limey tech journalists. To their credit, Intel's international…
CONFONZ — Last week saw two ubernerdy conferences for customers of two big software companies in San Francisco. BEA's conference at Moscone West was completely fucking empty. There were a handful of people on each floor, all looking around wondering why there was no one nearby with which to press the flesh. VMware's…
Please welcome back the ConFonz, our secret correspondent from the world of conferences. — Ed.
CONFONZ — One of the nicest parts about being the Conference Fonzerelli is overhearing the amazing stories told in-between roundtables and plenary sessions. They're rarely newsworthy, but such tales often portend just how…
CONFONZ — To be perfectly honest, Terra, just underneath the Bay bridge, is becomign the go-to spot for any and all PR firms to hold events for their clients. Unfortunately, this means that your humble narrator, the Conference Fonzerelli, has had some of his weaker moments in front of the wait-staff therein.…
CONFONZ — Lo, and below him, he saw the valley. Above him he saw the smog filled skies, and in his hand he found a broken bottle of bourbon, half drained and bloodied. Where had this bottle come from, and why was the humble Conference Fonzerelli stumbling around on Microsoft's Mountain View campus? And, for the love…
Hold on to your hats — we hear Bill Gates was boring as the keynote speaker for the info-security RSA Conference, ongoing at Moscone Center. Fortunately, Conference Fonzerelli is on hand, much to his personal regret. The ConFonz quoth:
You're all expecting some sort of expletive-encrusted fecal-festival gracing gooey herein html. Bully bullocks are always zipping zazzily towards you fucking alphabetical heads.
Heyyyyy, ConFonz! Valleywag's go-to man for conferences smells Oprah-style freebies at Office 2.0.
This week, the Conference Fonzie reports from the Intel Developer Forum at SF's Moscone Center. Dig in!
ConFonz returns with yet another conference report. This time he reports from the BEA Systems enterprise software conference at San Francisco's Moscone Center.
The Conference Fonzie is still at LinuxWorld, this time sending in his longest report yet. Like a North Atlantic iceberg, most of this one is under the horizon; hit the post title to see it all.
Valleywag correspondent ConFonz reports today from the world's most graybeard-saturated convention. LinuxWorld is like Disney World without the trauma of seeing an on-break Goofy holding his own head.
Valleywag correspondent ConFonz raced out of Silicon Valley to hang at DefCon, the daddy of all hacker conventions. Here's his report, grisly as a post-mescaline Hunter S. Thompson piece.
Valleywag's conference correspondent, the ConFonz, is slowly turning his column here into Fear and Loathing in San Jose. Enjoy.
Valleywag abhors censorship. But it also abhors looking like a [CENSORED] that just [CENSORED]ed two double-D [CENSORED]s. The latest Conference Fonzie report belongs on "The Aristocrats" more than it does on this blog, so enjoy ConFonz's, erm, colorful metaphors as he describes the MI6 Conference.
Aaayyy, ConFonz! Valleywag's best-groomed correspondent finds the dance floor and stays remarkably un-potty-mouthed at the IEEE Microwave Something-or-Other Con.
ConFonz, is nursing a SloshCon hangover — "Aaaay, I'm up and moving!" — but even a morning migraine can't stop Valleywag's favorite correspondent from reporting.
As the Register's Andrew Orlowski flies back to England, it's time to check up on the other trolls of tech — the real journalists, fake journalists, and — ugh — bloggers.
