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crime and punishment

Ruh Roh Haha. Known annoyance and suspected gay Fabian Basabe was arrested in Los Angeles on Wednesday night. For peeing. The sometimes Paper magazine blogger was allegedly going wee behind a trendytit club when some nasty old coppers (to whom he was "verbally abusive") showed up and didn't approve. Basabe, who, conveniently, had a warrant out for a previous DUI, was released on $85,000 bail. His lawyer blames a "bladder problem." Which just goes to show you that people would rather be the public face of pissing-pants disease than face John Law. Good luck with your demons, Fabian. [P6]

crime and punishment

Lindsay Lohan To Spend 8 Hours In the Land of the Dead

Worst actress in the world and drunk driver Lindsay Lohan was sentenced to spend two four-hour days working in a Los Angeles morgue to knock some sense into her re: driving while completely blitzed. (Also, remember when she slept with three dudes on New Years Eve? That was funny.) As the Times notes, " She has already served 84 minutes in jail as part of the plea deal." No word yet on what LiLo will be doing with the stiffs but lets just hope she's never seen Clerks II. Ooo, that was in awful taste! If the Los Angeles legal system worked under the Dantean system of contrapasso, the felonious Lohan would be condemned to sit through a loop of her ouevre. 8 hours of that is enough to drive anyone from drink! [NYT]

crafts and punishment

Martha Stewart Shows Off Prison Crafts


On her Christmas show, Martha Stewart produced the ceramic Nativity Scene she crafted while she was in prison. The other inmates had to pick just one figure a month to fire 'n' glaze—but MarStew did the whole thing in her five month on the inside. It's cute at the end, she asks her mother in the audience if she likes it and you can tell Martha Sr. is just thinking, "Bitch, are you really asking me if I'm proud of the damned brown clay figures you made while you were in jail?" But actually? They're pretty impressive! More »