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Posts Tagged “

David Hasselhoff

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gossip roundup

Paris Hilton Nipple Flashes Exported To England

  • Apparently hungry for attention in London, Paris Hilton declared Kim Kardashian's butt "disgusting, it reminds me of cottage cheese inside a big trash bag." Then she said Jessica Simpson's boobs were too big. Then she flashed her own boobs again outside a hotel; click here for a bigger shot (via WENN) if you're not bored of Hilton's nipples yet. [Sun]
  • Christian Siriano from Project Runway said the girls on The Hills have fashion lines that are not "that great... I mean, it's fun and flirty and young, but they're not innovators. None of them will ever be an innovative designer." [Perez]
  • Cameron Diaz lost her father suddenly and unexpectedly to pneumonia. Production of the actress' latest movie was shut down. TMZ, which broke the story, has not yet tried to make an awful joke about it. [TMZ]
  • So Pete Wentz was lying when he denied Ashlee Simpson is pregnant. People now joins Us and OK! in saying the musicians are expecting a kid, and as the old journalism rule goes, three celebrity media sources is confirmation. Also, Wentz sidestepped a question about the rumors in an MTV interview rather than try and deny them again. [People]
  • Now that he's made out with Perez Hilton, every single conquest of singer John Mayer will be second-guessed and possibly ridiculed. Which is kind of how things should be. The press is finally doing its job! [P6]
  • This model's 12-year-old daughter wants a boob job, but the responsible mom is making the daughter wait until she's 16. [Sun]
  • David and Victoria Beckham are sending their son to a Jewish school in LA. They're both half. Sort of. Not really: David's Mom's family was Jewish, but she doesn't practice. But he has a tattoo in Hebrew, and so does she. [Sun]
  • David Hasselhoff's assistant tried to round up groupies for the TV star, then steal them. He failed at both. [Gatecrasher]

6:20 AM on Wed Apr 16 2008
By Ryan Tate
9,713 views, 40 comments

Latest by TedSez: Is young Beckhamstein Jr. going to an actual Jewish school, or a "kabbalah" school with a Jewish-sounding name? I doubt the Sun can tell the difference. more »

stupid ideas

Historic Meeting of the Minds in Los Angeles

Ohh gosh. Britney Spears, calamine-stained wig collector and sideways recording artist, has of late been spending some time with David Hasselhoff, well respected star of the television series Baywatch and the film Floor Hamburger for Algernon. The two were introduced to each other by Britney's father Jamie, which makes mother Lynne "incandescent with rage at Jamie's stupidity." After all, Hasselhoff (also a famous baloney salesman in Germany) has had some substance problems of his own and may not be the best pal for old Britney walnuts. Lynne thinks it's all a cheap publicity stunt so Jamie can get some buzz for a new business. But it's possible that Britney is getting something out of these meetings (which involve watching many episodes of Knightrider and practicing "primal scream therapy" in the back yard). A neighbor says of the rendezvous: "Britney turns up looking like she's carrying a big bag of bad on her back and the noise can get a bit much, but she always leaves with a smile on her face." Though, the "big bag of bad" is just the Hoff in a papoose, which they use for their secret morning constitutionals. [Showbiz Spy] After the jump, exclusive video of one of their get-togethers. More »

9:42 AM on Mon Mar 24 2008
By Richard
791 views, 17 comments

Latest by SlickaNicka: Its like "Copenhagen" for the My Name is Earl generation....sigh. more »

the sound of one hand wringing

'Times' to Readers: Try Not To Think About Boorish Hollywood Dads

New York Times Theorist of Celebrity Caryn James needs just 39 words today to authoritatively defeat our vulgarian fascination with the likes of the David Hasselhoff daughter-abuse videotape and the Alec Baldwin daughter-abuse audiotape. "These new leaks simply draw all of us into family battles where we don't belong," reasons a firm but feisty Ms. James. "Beyond the humane idea that some things really should remain private, even for fame-mongers, these leaks have an insidious snowball effect on the culture." Fortunately, for reasons of context, James precedes her renunciative 39 words with 477 drawing us into the Hasselhoff and Baldwin battles, and follows them with 504 more regarding these two things which "really should remain private." You know, just to confirm exactly what we should not be caring about.
More »

6:30 PM on Sat May 19 2007
By jliu
1,224 views, 9 comments

Latest by gonzosmom: I believe that women who possess brass ovaries do not need tampons. more »

gawker book club

"Don't Hassle The Hoff": The Hoff Tries To Dance With A Star

It's time for another excerpt from Don't Hassel the Hoff (St. Martin's Press, May 15), the autobiography of one of the world's most loved entertainers. In this installment, the Hoff hits on Heather Mills for some completely inexplicable reason. More »

6:03 PM on Fri May 11 2007
By Emily Gould
2,932 views, 5 comments

gawker book club

"Don't Hassel The Hoff": Joel Stein Drove The Hoff To Drink!

The HoffIt's time for another excerpt from Don't Hassel the Hoff (St. Martin's Press, May 15), the autobiography of one of the world's most loved entertainers. In this installment, a career setback (News To Me, a sitcom co-starring the Hoff about the life of Joel Fucking Stein, was cancelled before it got out of the gate) sends David spiraling back into the arms of sweet, sweet alcohol, with results that seem eerily resonant given recent developments in the author's life. More »

2:58 PM on Wed May 9 2007
By abalk2
3,413 views, 20 comments

Latest by DeeHaney: Could this really be true? The Hof is not perfect? more »

the gawker ombudsman

Meet Our New Watchdog

Yesterday, Gawker revealed that Buck "Hoyt" Kent, 64, was becoming its second Ombudsman. Kent won a Webby in 2003 for his coverage of that weird smell at the A/C/E station on 34th Street, and until recently was the rape-and-murder cartographer for Gothamist. He was one of the first bloggers to question the stories about Tom Cruise buying an apartment in the Dakota, stories that we still maintain are true. Or true-ish. He spoke with Chick's Clothes Occasionally reporter Jake Woodward. More »

12:40 PM on Tue May 8 2007
By abalk2
1,683 views, 10 comments

Latest by the-woog: why oh why would you besmirch mad dog mattis this way? Most highly decorated Marine on active duty; deliciously strict but fair, and much funnier than he looks. the stories that could be told... more »

gawker book club

"Don't Hassel The Hoff": Hoff Calls 'Baywatch' Sexist!

Wow, tough week for David Hasselhoff, huh? First someone leaks a tape of the drunken entertainer's inability to eat a cheeseburger. Now, TMZ reports that a Superior Court judged has barred him from visiting his children. So much publicity! If only he had something to promote! More »

4:35 PM on Mon May 7 2007
By abalk2
8,301 views, 18 comments

gossip roundup

Kirsten Dunst Has Her Priorities In Order

  • Kirsten Dunst bailed early on the Spiderman 3 premiere to attend her own birthday party, which seems like a good call to us. [Page Six]
  • David Hasselhoff blames his ex-wife, who "has her own agenda," for leaking his embarrassing boozy video. It's like the Baldwin thing but a thousand times more pathetic! [Page Six]
  • Today is Paris Hilton's DUI case's court date! Prosecutors want her to serve 45 days in jail. [TMZ]
  • Hills 'star' Heidi Montag is getting her money's worth from those new boobs. [Egotastic]
  • Frank Rich is getting sued, oooh! Oh. By an audiobook publisher, for breach of contract or something. We were interested and now are not. [R&M, last item]
    • More »

    10:20 AM on Fri May 4 2007
    By Emily Gould
    2,763 views, 19 comments

    Latest by BritneysBaldHoohoo: Please let Paris go to jail, Jebus. She might emerge with her other eye wonked-it would make a matching set, at last! more »

    david hasselhoff

    Remainders: The Hoff Needs a Nap

    • David Hasselhoff is just exhausted, so much so that he fell asleep during a televised interview. He says he hadn't been drinking, just popping ludes. [AHN]
    • Bobby Brown faces arrest after failing to pay child support to the mother of his first child. Considering his gravy train just filed for divorce from him and he's asking for cars instead of appearance fees, we're thinking that cash isn't going to be showing up anytime soon. [Reuters]
    • The Chinese can be relied upon for two things: food and spit. Regarding the latter, Animal magazine is looking for your spitting-Asian pictures, presumably for some sort of expose of the saliva-flecked streets of lower Manhattan. [Craigslist]
    • After finally agreeing to count cab drivers, New York's population is revised upwards to 8.2 million. [Crain's]
    • The U.S. finds a new method of torture: having detainees at Guatanamo eat 4,200 calories per day. [AP]
    • After all that crazy Jew-starving, what's better than a cookie and a Frappucino? [AOPJLH]
    • Chevrolet is SO FUCKING AMERICAN. And Stephen Colbert, don't steal that line. [Jalopnik]
    • Know your downtown hotels and avoid them. [HotelChatter]
    • Wait — bloggers aren't above the law? Crap. [USA Today]
    • Jason Calacanis unfamiliar with common male desires, libido, and/or heterosexuality. [Valleywag]

    7:05 PM on Tue Oct 3 2006
    By Jessica
    75 views, 3 comments

    Latest by Jadorezola: Forget the CHINESE and their spitting.. Try getting pictures of Polish in Greenpoint and their snot rockets... got it all over my camera lens!! more »

    david hasselhoff

    Hasselhoff Suicide Shocker: The Cat Did It

    The plot thickens! Or at least gets marginally more tawdry. The alleged suicide attempt by David Hasselhoff's 14-year-old daughter Haley may have been just a misappropriated act of micro-violence. Specifically, Hasselhoff's estranged ex Pamela Bach claims that the cut Haley received was just the result of a cat scratch, an incident that Hasselhoff is attempting to manipulate from molehill to mountain by making the phony suicide call. Hasselhoff disagrees, claiming he didn't mention suicide on the call, "but his publicist says the 911 operator may have interpreted it that way." Perhaps the animal was merely attempting an assisted suicide, which is nevertheless still illegal, even for a cat. David has always struck us as more of a wrinkly dog man, anyway. More »

    6:00 PM on Mon Sep 25 2006
    By Chris Mohney
    6,144 views, 10 comments

    Latest by pseudopsych: I think this is really the work of Lewis the cat! PS: That photo is hilarious. more »

    david hasselhoff

    Gossip Roundup: David Hasselhoff's Daughter Not a 'Baywatch' Fan

    • David Hasselhoff's 14-year-old daughter Hayley "cut herself" on Sunday night in what apparently was a suicide attempt. Not a lot of jokes to be made here, but perhaps The Hoff might want to reconsider his drunken public persona. (And hey, wankers, let's not make fun of aesthetics?) [TMZ]
    • After soccerthrob David Beckham was dropped from the English team, he turned to Tom Cruise for comfort. For warmth. For the sort of love that feels like a breath of fresh air after years spent in a cave... [IMDb]
    • Steven Tyler has Hepatitis C. What does it mean when you read an item like this and just shrug? [Lowdown]
    • In Robert Smigel's new routine, Triumph the Insult Comic Dog will rape an Ernie doll and taunt him for having gay sex with his Sesame Street roommate, Bert. Puppet rape. It's really come to this. [Page Six]
    • After just one week of pre-marital bliss, Aaron Carter calls off his engagement. Slow Monday, we know. [Us Weekly]
    • If you inhaled during the early 00s, you know and love infomercial psychic Miss Cleo. And if you're a lady, she's ready to love you back. [NYDN]
    • File under shit you didn't need to know: Donald Trump's porn name would either be "Big" or "The Trump Tower." [Page Six]

    1:00 PM on Mon Sep 25 2006
    By Jessica
    611 views, 5 comments

    Latest by lawyerlez: My partner (who speaks no German) has been obsessively watching "Bernie und Ert" clips on youtube. Apparently, the Germans think that the orange one (Ernie, right?) is the pitcher and the yellow one is the catcher. Highly recommended: Drogen, Selbstmord more »

    lindsay lohan

    Gossip Roundup: But Really, How Is Her Septum Doing?

    • Lindsay's "friend" swears up and down that Lohan is off the nose candy. Just because she's not doing it with you, honey... [Gatecrasher]
    • Anna Wintour's interior designer/party planner David Monn has dared to ditch the Vogue editor. After two years of designing her precious Costume Insitute Gala, Monn didn't get so much as a namecheck in the latest Vogue write-up, so he dumped Wintour from his client list. Hellfire, brimstone TK. [Page Six]
    • Pete Doherty has been arrested again for possession. This has to be some sort of record, either for drug arrests or utter stupidity. [RS]
    • Samantha Cole, the other questionable lady who once slept with Christie Brinkley's philandering hubby Peter Cook, still can't parlay her revived infamy into getting her CD played at a club. [R&M (2nd to last)]
    • It's official: the Hoff is a single man. Why are your pants still on?? [Us Weekly]
    • Paris Hilton does shots of water, because she hates the taste of alcohol. Besides, she's just as wasted when she's drinking water. [TMZ]
    • The secret to a thriving PR company? Cocaine. Not just for your clients, but for yourself. Yay! [Page Six]

    12:10 PM on Fri Aug 18 2006
    By Jessica
    175 views, 2 comments

    Latest by Sue Duhnim: Lindsay should keep a photo of Tara Reid on her person just as a reminder of where little Lindsay is headed. more »

    david hasselhoff

    David Hasselhoff: Momentary King of Celeb Kitsch

    Now that everyone seems to have calmed down about Chuck Norris, David Hasselhoff has re-re-re-emerged as the fleeting kitsch masculinity icon of the moment, receptive to the brutish advances of anyone with a reasonably fat endorsement check. Hence this ad for British net provider Pipex that's been making the rounds, where Hasselhoff loudly claims his title as "king of the Internet." One has to admire the Hoff — briefly — for throwing himself shamelessly into the mugging. Afterwards, you realize you never want to say "the Hoff" again, even sarcastically. More »

    10:15 AM on Thu Aug 3 2006
    By Chris Mohney
    230 views, 5 comments

    Latest by n/a: broadband................droling more »

    david hasselhoff

    Gossip Roundup: What We Would Give to Be the Hoff

    • David Hasselhoff is barred from Wimbledon because he sweats vodka and tried to get in without a ticket, screaming, "Do you know who I am? I'm the Hoff!" David, that shit only works on the set of Baywatch Nights. [Page Six]
    • Nicky Hilton plans to open her own chain of hotels. The girl loves a challenge. [People]
    • Hillary Clinton refuses to cooperate with writer Gail Sheehy for her forthcoming profile in Vanity Fair, maybe because Sheehy is seen attending events in a bright orange blazer. [Lowdown]
    • Get photographed with some blow, and you'll raise your income by $11 million. Sears Portrait Studio, here we come! [Page Six]
    • Russell Crowe and Danielle Spencer give birth to a baby boy; Crowe promptly punches baby in the face. [Us Weekly]
    • Johnny Damon smoked pot as a kid. Related: new study finds that some teens drink alcohol. [R&M]

    12:38 PM on Fri Jul 7 2006
    By Jessica
    103 views, 1 comment

    Latest by Norma Desmond: Wait, he calls HIMSELF "The Hoff?" That makes me a little sad. more »