Today at Gawker.TV, let's all laugh at The Situation's high school "pizza face" yearbook photo, Tom Cruise threatens Regis Philbin's marriage, Kathy Griffin contends in a beauty pageant, and (spoiler alert!) watch the first four minutes of Futurama's triumphant return.
Mr. Joe Dirt—also known as David Spade—stopped by the Today Show to discuss his upcoming movie Grown Ups. In it, he horrifies audiences by showing off his pasty ass.
What else? Joe Francis might have had something to do with Tila Tequila/Casey Johnson. Angelie Jolie's latest production: Salt-y. Artie Lange has a gig, Lydia Hearst has a mans, Patti Smith's still punk. Presenting your Sunday Morning Gossip Roundup:
• Time Inc. is expected to announce plans to slash $100 million in costs next week; naturally, lots of layoffs will be involved in making that happen. [NYT]
• The Wall Street Journal is closing its Boston bureau. Also in Beantown: The Boston Globe's publisher has announced he's stepping down. [BW, NYT]
• The war…
David Spade had his sniveling say about the DirecTV commercial he did with Chris Farley's ghost. Now, one of the guys who wrote the commercial writes a fair, reasonable blog post about his intentions. Okay. But he ends with this:
David Spade, a real human with a real human heart, is so wounded by the criticism of his new ad "starring" his dead pal Chris Farley that he's come forth with a heartfelt statement from his flack.
The trustees of the estate of Chris Farley agree: The deceased beloved portly comedian would really enjoy DirecTV, were he not dead and all. Also, David Spade is available for kids' birthday parties and cheap blowjobs. Sleazebags.
Designer Oscar de la Renta turns 77 today. Rufus Wainwright is 36. Actor Willem Dafoe is turning 54. John Leguizamo and David Spade are both turning 45. Publishing industry heavyweight Ann Godoff is 60. Actor Danny Glover is turning 63. John Wren, the president and CEO of the ad agency Omnicom, is turning 57. Former…
Kate Spade's husband Andy—he's also David Spade's brother! Who cares? Well nobody really, if you want to be a dick about it, but it's good to know David Spade was a nerd from day one:
Rachel Bilson shopping on the Lower East Side ... Kate Beckinsale talking to David Spade outside her hotel ... Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen shopping at Barneys ... Katie Holmes carrying coffee on a walk downtown ... William H. Macy and Felicity Huffman walking on Madison after leaving lunch at Nello's ... Kirsten Dunst …
Something about this time of year really brings out the do-gooder in all of us. Take for example David Spade, who reached deep into his man-purse and pulled out $100,000 worth of new police rifles!
♦ Angelina Jolie can be seen breastfeeding on the cover of the upcoming issue of W. Brad Pitt is the one who took the pics. He's also the one who convinced Angie to have kids of her own, she says. [NYDN, People]
♦ A judge denied Christie Brinkley's request for a temporary restraining order that would bar Peter Cook
Back when David Spade was dating Heather Locklear, Hollywood tongues wagged endlessly, wondering, "How does he do it?" Eventually, people realized that Spade is one of the great Casanovas of our time, able to woo some of the industry's biggest beauties by simply following the maxim, "Be normal and kind of have your…
You gotta admit, when it comes to ladies, David Spade has an amazing track record. He’s nailed Heather Locklear, Lara Flynn Boyle, Krista Allen, Julie Bowen, Teri Hatcher, Gena Lee Nolin, Kristy Swanson, and countless Playboy playmates, including one he recently impregnated. But is he really the Don Juan of our time?…
♦ Samantha Ronson refused to DJ an event at Rubyfruit, allegedly because she doesn't spin at gay or lesbian bars. Her rep, of course, denies this. [P6]
♦ David Spade didn't turn up at Eric Trump's charity golf tournament in New Jersey last week because he thought it was taking place at Trump's LA course. [P6]
♦ …
· Let Lindsay Lohan, Albert Brooks, Jamie Lynn Spears, and Life Magazine introduce you to the GOP's great vice-presidential hope. · In one of the best TV scraps since Judd Apatow eradicated That 70s Show's Mark Brazill, Greg Garcia branded Alec Baldwin as an "unlikeable, psychotic narcissist" after Baldwin bitched…
