Look to your left; look to your right. One of the mild-mannered, college-educated people sitting next to you could be harboring a secret McRib Sandwich fetish. Generic machine-shaped pork product addicts are, reportedly, everywhere.

America's Future First Family, The Palins, are whiling away their time up in Wasilla, Alaska, as usual. Sarah's counting her speaking money; Bristol's counting her speaking money; and Todd—well, Todd's just there to intimidate the reporters.