In a lawsuit filed Friday in California, a dental technician who had been assisting in treatment of an abscess in Charlie Sheen's mouth alleged that the buckwild addict actor sexually assaulted her, threatened the dentist with a knife, and flung spit all over the walls of the room. The dentist working on Sheen has…

Charlie Sheen, erratic Taco Bell enthusiast and former television Man, is being investigated for assault after allegedly threatening his dentist with a knife Thursday. A dental technician told police Sheen was high on cocaine and flipped out while she was trying to administer nitrous oxide.

We all have teeth, at least most of us do. If you don't have teeth, that's not our problem! But this kid, wow—he had 232 teeth, which I think we can all agree is way too many fucking teeth.

Since David After Dentist debuted in 2009, there have been so many videos of the crazy shit people say under anesthesia after getting their wisdom teeth removed that it's practically a genre now—and this girl just redefined it.

Hey there, sweetness. No cavities. You are a great flosser. But why don't you smile more? I bet it's 'cause of this little gap here in your cute little bunny teeth. No, here. Open up, let me show you. I've got just the thing you need. Your boss'll give you a raise! Just lie back and let me take care of it.

A dentist's office in suburban Tusla, Oklahoma could have exposed 7,000 patients to a variety of blood-borne viruses including hepatitis B, hepatitis C, and HIV. Susan Rogers, executive director of the Oklahoma Board of Dentistry, described the office as a "perfect storm." She said that health investigators were at a…

Lindsay Lohan's probation was revoked yesterday, but hey, did you see how pretty her teeth looked? She totally got them fixed since last time we saw them, when they were jacked.

Florida authorities have arrested a trio of dental hygiene heisters, peridontal purloiners accused of stealing $3 million worth of electric toothbrushes and whitening strips from more than 60 retail stores.

Mark Zuckerberg's dad, Edward, is a dentist in Dobbs Ferry, NY. We got some sense of the guy from the goofy letter he sent out to prospective patients claiming to be "literally the father of Facebook." But he's not so blatant about his Facebook connection any more.

Glassman Dental Care is located in Manhattan and features a husband/wife team (Steven and Debra) of cosmetic dentists. Here's an ad for the practice, set to the Rihanna/Eminem song, "Love the Way You Lie," but changed to "Love Invisalign."

Hollywood has it wrong: The real "father of Facebook" was not a young hacker working out of a Harvard dorm room; it was a technologically advanced dentist in the suburbs of New York City. Just ask Edward J. Zuckerberg, D.D.S.

A reader who lives near William DeJean, the nutty Chicago dentist who's randomly running "Hillary 2012" ads on TV in New Orleans, sent in a photo of DeJean's office window, showcasing a Hillary Clinton cut-out and Bill Clinton rubber mask.

American politics makes such little sense nowadays that any random jumble of words you put together is likely to describe a real-world situation. For example: Some Chicago dentist is currently running "Hillary 2012" TV ads in New Orleans. It's true!

Newsweek, which traditionally (dentist's office joke), has for the first time ever correctly identified an overarching trend in American society and formulated a reasonable response, unaccompanied by any special "The Historical Jesus" stories!

Yuppie clothier Lacoste just got its French ass handed to it for a second time during a court battle to protect its trademark crocodile logo. Who dared impinge on its copyright? A pair of British dentists who hung the sign on the left here outside their offices. The court ruled against Lacoste and fined the company…