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New York, 12:49 AM
Mon Nov 30
11 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #donuts more →

    Cop Saves Money Stereotypically

    Extreme Dieting Prolongs Your Miserable Life, Say Donut-Munching Scientists

    'Gossip Girl' Star Runs From Fear Of Food

    "Dunkin Donuts is one of our sponsors," Idiot!

    The Incredible Shrinking Donut of Balthazar
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of BadUncle BadUncle
    07/20/09

    In reply to Cop Saves Money Stereotypically
    This is a senseless crime. Doesn't Dunkin Donuts give out free coffee and donuts to cops, anyway? Either way, nice rythmic comic pacing, HamNo. It was almost like Homer, but with donuts.
     Reply
    BadUncle was starred BadUncle was unstarred
    Image of Smitros Smitros
    07/20/09

    In reply to Cop Saves Money Stereotypically
    Sgt. Turetsky is now a Bismarcked man.
     Reply
    Smitros was starred Smitros was unstarred
    Image of badasscat badasscat
    07/20/09

    In reply to Cop Saves Money Stereotypically
    Er...what exactly is a "Boston Creme sandwich"?
     Reply
    badasscat was starred badasscat was unstarred
    Image of Hamilton Nolan Hamilton Nolan
    07/20/09

    @badasscat: Two Boston Creme donuts for bread, and a Boston Creme donut in the middle.
     Reply
    Hamilton Nolan was starred Hamilton Nolan was unstarred
    Image of Uncle_Billy_Slumming Uncle_Billy_Slumming
    07/20/09

    @Hamilton Nolan:

    Look at what Blakeley's done to you people.
     Reply
    Uncle_Billy_Slumming was starred Uncle_Billy_Slumming was unstarred
    Image of fileunder fileunder
    07/20/09

    In reply to Cop Saves Money Stereotypically
    Too bad he frittered away his reputation like that.
     Reply
    fileunder was starred fileunder was unstarred
    Image of Smitros Smitros
    07/20/09

    @fileunder:

    Psycho-cruller, qu'est-ce que c'est!

    I guess this involves the Long John of the law.
     Reply
    Smitros was starred Smitros was unstarred
    Image of naugahydeinplainsight naugahydeinplainsight
    07/20/09

    @fileunder: Perhaps he'll turnover a new leaf.
    Zeppoles are pretty tolerant, since most can relate -- you know, "Beignet, done that."
     Reply
    Edited by naugahydeinplainsight at 07/20/09 12:31 PM naugahydeinplainsight was starred naugahydeinplainsight was unstarred
    Image of Botswana Meat Commission FC Botswana Meat Commission FC
    07/20/09

    @fileunder:
    Call me old fashioned, but my eyes just glazed over the fact that relations between the police and community have traditionally been frosted.
     Reply
    Botswana Meat Commission FC was starred Botswana Meat Commission FC was unstarred
    Image of belltolls belltolls
    07/20/09

    @Botswana Meat Commission FC: I think this is just a terrible mistake and I hope eclairs this all up.
     Reply
    belltolls was starred belltolls was unstarred
    Image of naugahydeinplainsight naugahydeinplainsight
    07/20/09

    @Smitros: Three churros!
     Reply
    naugahydeinplainsight was starred naugahydeinplainsight was unstarred
    Image of fileunder fileunder
    07/20/09

    @naugahydeinplainsight: At the very yeast, you have all raised very good points.
     Reply
    Edited by fileunder at 07/20/09 12:45 PM fileunder was starred fileunder was unstarred
    Image of SidAndFinancy SidAndFinancy
    07/20/09

    @fileunder:
    Even on duty, a cop can munchkin he not?
     Reply
    SidAndFinancy was starred SidAndFinancy was unstarred
    Image of DahlELama DahlELama
    07/20/09

    @SidAndFinancy: Those cops simply don't cut the custard.
     Reply
    DahlELama was starred DahlELama was unstarred
    Image of fileunder fileunder
    07/20/09

    @SidAndFinancy: As long as he's not funneling any money, yes.
     Reply
    fileunder was starred fileunder was unstarred
    Image of SidAndFinancy SidAndFinancy
    07/20/09

    @fileunder: Now I know why Tim Horton heard a "weee-ooo-weee-ooo."
     Reply
    SidAndFinancy was starred SidAndFinancy was unstarred
    Image of fileunder fileunder
    07/20/09

    @SidAndFinancy: You've lost your marbled.
     Reply
    fileunder was starred fileunder was unstarred
    Image of Smitros Smitros
    07/20/09

    @naugahydeinplainsight:
    Videotape or no, I bet there's a hole in the case.
     Reply
    Smitros was starred Smitros was unstarred
    Image of DahlELama DahlELama
    07/20/09

    @fileunder: Have a little sympathy--maybe his wife has a bun in the oven.
     Reply
    DahlELama was starred DahlELama was unstarred
    Image of aLostLady aLostLady
    07/20/09

    @fileunder: This story has lemon-filled me with angst. I truly am cinnamon-twisted up inside. I never thought I'd see the da(y)nish when an officer would try to save dough by stealing it.
     Reply
    fileunder promoted this comment aLostLady was starred aLostLady was unstarred
    Image of naugahydeinplainsight naugahydeinplainsight
    07/20/09

    @Smitros: Meanwhile, as he turned in his badge and weapon, someone was heard to say: "Leave the gun, take the cannoli."
     Reply
    naugahydeinplainsight was starred naugahydeinplainsight was unstarred
    Image of Uncle_Billy_Slumming Uncle_Billy_Slumming
    07/20/09

    @naugahydeinplainsight:

    I d'eclaire, butter milk this one for all it's worth.
     Reply
    Uncle_Billy_Slumming was starred Uncle_Billy_Slumming was unstarred
    Image of Smitros Smitros
    07/20/09

    @naugahydeinplainsight:
    But in the fullness of time, this guy will say he's been rolled.
     Reply
    Smitros was starred Smitros was unstarred
    Image of naugahydeinplainsight naugahydeinplainsight
    07/20/09

    In reply to Cop Saves Money Stereotypically
    To Protect and Self-Serve
     Reply
    Edited by naugahydeinplainsight at 07/20/09 12:13 PM naugahydeinplainsight was starred naugahydeinplainsight was unstarred
    Image of goetz goetz
    07/20/09

    In reply to Cop Saves Money Stereotypically
    So a cop took a few doughnuts, big deal. You would too if you were that drunk.
     Reply
    Mount_Prion promoted this comment goetz was starred goetz was unstarred
    Image of If_I_Had_a_Poodle If_I_Had_a_Poodle
    07/10/09

    In reply to Extreme Dieting Prolongs Your Miserable Life, Say Donut-Munching Scientists
    shorter health and diet advice: don't eat crap.

    u can send checks or money orders
     Reply
    Edited by If_I_Had_a_Poodle at 07/10/09 3:19 PM If_I_Had_a_Poodle was starred If_I_Had_a_Poodle was unstarred
    Image of Urbania Urbania
    07/10/09

    In reply to Extreme Dieting Prolongs Your Miserable Life, Say Donut-Munching Scientists
    As an Astorian with an interest in fairness, who knows that there is a Dunkins in every direction, on every other block, I will give Tim Horton's this tip: forget Penn Station and surrounds. Open a few shops on 30th Avenue and your problems will be SOLVED.
     Reply
    Urbania was starred Urbania was unstarred
    Image of TedSez TedSez
    07/10/09

    In reply to Extreme Dieting Prolongs Your Miserable Life, Say Donut-Munching Scientists
    Actually, the people who follow "caloric restriction" only eat 20-30 percent fewer calories than normal-- which means they actually eat more than the millions of people who are constantly dieting to lose weight. (Though without the cheesecake binges in between.) And they eat the most nutritious food possible, which also happens to be quite filling.

    So, no, it isn't as bad as all that. I might even try it myself if it weren't for the existence of Spicy Nacho Doritos.
     Reply
    TedSez was starred TedSez was unstarred
    Image of Private Hangnail Private Hangnail
    07/10/09

    In reply to Extreme Dieting Prolongs Your Miserable Life, Say Donut-Munching Scientists
    Subjects 14, 36, 67, and 91, all on the standard diet, were dismembered and consumed by Subject 2, currently on the restricted diet. Once isolated Subject 2 continued the restricted diet for a period of six hours. Shortly thereafter Subject 2 was witnessed consuming various of his body parts. All deaths have been deemed natural.
     Reply
    Private Hangnail was starred Private Hangnail was unstarred
    Image of Mount_Prion Mount_Prion
    07/10/09

    In reply to Extreme Dieting Prolongs Your Miserable Life, Say Donut-Munching Scientists
    Due to an unfortunate typo, the scientists accidentally replaced rhesus monkeys with Jesus monkeys. This explains the lower caloric requirement, the presence of chemicals akin to red wine when only water was provided, and the nighttime resurrections that were mistaken for longevity.
     Reply
    Mount_Prion was starred Mount_Prion was unstarred
    Image of BBooms BBooms
    07/10/09

    In reply to Extreme Dieting Prolongs Your Miserable Life, Say Donut-Munching Scientists
    Holy shit you guys, the fashion people were right. I'm officially reducing my diet to three crackers a day.
     Reply
    BBooms was starred BBooms was unstarred
    Image of NoWireHangers NoWireHangers
    07/10/09

    In reply to Extreme Dieting Prolongs Your Miserable Life, Say Donut-Munching Scientists
    So this means that GOOP will be yammering on about the merits of juice cleanses long after I'm found dead clutching a block of Velveeta™.
     Reply
    NoWireHangers was starred NoWireHangers was unstarred
    Image of EleanorRigby EleanorRigby
    07/10/09

    In reply to Extreme Dieting Prolongs Your Miserable Life, Say Donut-Munching Scientists
    Every time I read one of these calorie restriction articles, I say to myself, "what is the point of living to 120 if you can't eat some freaking fried chicken whenever the mood strikes?" And who wants to go to someone's house for dinner if they're going to look at your flesh like it's a Thanksgiving turkey?
     Reply
    EleanorRigby was starred EleanorRigby was unstarred
    Image of SpicyMeatball SpicyMeatball
    07/10/09

    In reply to Extreme Dieting Prolongs Your Miserable Life, Say Donut-Munching Scientists
    I believe the takeaway from this is that I should eat rhesus monkeys that have been deprived of calories so that I might have their vital essence...right?
     Reply
    SpicyMeatball was starred SpicyMeatball was unstarred
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