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The Ed Hardy Whale Penis Tragedy
Mel Gibson Can't Be Blamed for Every Ripped T-Shirt in Hollywood
9 Things About Jon Gosselin's New Girlfriend
Harry Potter Wizards Dream Of Gossip Girl While Jon Gosselin Dreams Of Ed Hardy's Sparkles
Miley's Hanger On Shuns Bag Carrying Duties

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Spirit Fingers
11/13/09

In reply to The Ed Hardy Whale Penis Tragedy

I'm thinking that if you must wear the Ed Hardy over a Sears-pauper, shine fabric button-down, then you've missed the entire essence of the Ed Hardy shirt. As ridiculous as it is, there is a code, or so the collection of jack-holes I've seen have confirmed. So this obvious infraction should incur some sort of fine perhaps smelling like a wet emu, developing a virulent strain of asshole wipe-hand, or causing spontaneous revulsion and collective dry heaving at the sight of you in your, "I'm a fad and a chump." shirt. #trendwatch
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goodstory
11/13/09

In reply to The Ed Hardy Whale Penis Tragedy
I had a whale penis wallet.
when I rubbed it, it turned into a suitcase. #trendwatch
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Beau Nerd
11/13/09

In reply to The Ed Hardy Whale Penis Tragedy
As atonement for the near-sins of the luxury armored car industry, I would like to offer up the Ed Hardons and Ed Hardon Pretenders of the world, to be lovingly and terminally impaled upon the soft, soft leather of whalecock. Accept our apology, Sea Brothers, and continue to bear the weight of the earth, or something. #trendwatch
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Atilla the Bun
11/13/09

@Beau Nerd: If karma exists, there are some people that have a reincarnated future as krill... #trendwatch
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overunderover
11/13/09

In reply to The Ed Hardy Whale Penis Tragedy
There are two things that perplex me beyond belief. The first is how to create an alternative view of the universe based on a fluid hyperdimensional aether. The second, and perhaps more perplexing thing is why in the fuck would anyone where Ed Hardy anything?! Ever!? #trendwatch
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AndPreciousLittleofThat
11/13/09

In reply to The Ed Hardy Whale Penis Tragedy
Today also marks a sad day for America's women.

Without confirmation from Ed Hardy shirts, they'll only be able to identify assholes by their ornate jeans, overly precise facial hair, arms-only dance techniques, shoes with curled-up toes, rhinestones, braying donkey laughs, bandana headbands, extensive yellow gold jewelry, smirks...

Actually, never mind. The women of America will still be okay. #trendwatch
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sanyucat
11/13/09

In reply to The Ed Hardy Whale Penis Tragedy
Having that guy's picture under the words "Whale Penis" is causing internet-wide cognitive dissonance. #trendwatch
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heartbreakturnip
07/30/09

In reply to Mel Gibson Can't Be Blamed for Every Ripped T-Shirt in Hollywood
I make it a practice to rip the shirts of zombies. It's only right.
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Motoko Kusanagi
07/30/09

In reply to Mel Gibson Can't Be Blamed for Every Ripped T-Shirt in Hollywood
Fame these days seems to boil down to unlimited riches and lavish homes and all-access passes to everyone and everything, with one caveat: you will be tailed by the world's biggest douchebags at all times.

Seems fair to me.
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PandoraSpocks
07/30/09

In reply to Mel Gibson Can't Be Blamed for Every Ripped T-Shirt in Hollywood
Mel can go on drinking and fighting and clubbing and screwing around with women until he's on his deathbed. Then all he has to do is call for a priest, say he's really sorry and, poof! The gates of heaven will open for him anyway! This is the secret reason many of us remain Catholic.
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DahlELama
07/30/09

In reply to Mel Gibson Can't Be Blamed for Every Ripped T-Shirt in Hollywood
That guy is being a whiny baby, but I also hate Mel Gibson, so, tearful douchbag with no ballsac FTW!
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Spirit Fingers
07/30/09

In reply to Mel Gibson Can't Be Blamed for Every Ripped T-Shirt in Hollywood
Oh, my God. Oh, my God! He looks like one of the crazed, orb eyed, be-spiked monster-men from Beastmaster!

Wait, was Mel in that movie? Because apparently he lives in Thunderdome, all the time.
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goetz
07/30/09

In reply to Mel Gibson Can't Be Blamed for Every Ripped T-Shirt in Hollywood
Ripped shirt guy looks like he might be haunted.
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BadUncle
07/30/09

In reply to Mel Gibson Can't Be Blamed for Every Ripped T-Shirt in Hollywood
battery? For a ripped t-shirt? You pussy.
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Aethyr
07/30/09

In reply to Mel Gibson Can't Be Blamed for Every Ripped T-Shirt in Hollywood
What. Is wrong with his face. That's the most frightening identity protection I've ever seen.
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TheHonJudgeSmails
07/30/09

In reply to Mel Gibson Can't Be Blamed for Every Ripped T-Shirt in Hollywood
Well if a ghoulish-hellspawn with beady luminescent eyes, such as pictured above, were to accost me in a bar, I would attack it as well.
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Baroness
07/30/09

@TheHonJudgeSmails: I would've killed it in its crib, actually.
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