Welcome to ConBag, a daily roundup of gossip from the Democratic National Convention, which we are attending for four very long days.

The FBI interviewed presumptive Democratic presidential nominee Hillary Clinton for three-and-a-half hours on Saturday morning as part of its investigation into whether her use of a private email server during her time as Secretary of State broke the law. The interview was conducted at FBI Headquarters in Washington…

Donald Trump finally realized something about the population he has repeatedly, publicly, and unabashedly denigrating for months: they’ve got quite the voting power.

Republican presidential candidate Marco Rubio wore some cute boots yesterday. Once New York Times reporter Michael Barbaro tweeted out a photo of them, both political and fashion journalists had questions. How high are those heels? (Two inches, easily.) Where did he get them? (The campaign has yet to say.) Do they…

In a move that will only further endear him to his base of angwy widdle babies, Donald Trump said recently that he wouldn’t rule out the idea of issuing special IDs or maintaining a national database of Muslims if elected president. Baby likey!

After patriotism and religion, “attacking the media” is the most popular refuge of the scoundrel.

Duggars be damned: It turns out presidential Easter ham Mike Huckabee has another alleged child molester in his coterie. A prolific co-author of Huck’s and other Christian moralists’ books left his church and escaped prosecution when the statute of limitations ran out on his alleged sexual assaults of a young girl.

Some competitors thrive on being the underdog. Some find humor and vigor in humiliating setbacks. And some are just glass-jawed failure artists, their piled losses more befitting than any theoretical small victory. Rick Santorum is the latter, having reached mediocrity’s apogee while eating lunch alone on Monday.

People forget today that George W. Bush first ran for president as a “compassionate conservative” because it was novel to do so: Most conservatives openly acknowledged that they were pricks by 2000. Like George’s brother Jeb, who wrote in 1995 of wanting society to attach a “sense of ridicule” to single parenting.

He’s in! He’s got a website where he flaunts his geeker glasses and salutes a lot. Presumably he’s been working on his mnemonics, but hopefully not. Oh, happy day. Happy happy day. 2016, brothers. We will ride through the gates of Valhalla shiny and chrome. Witness me!

Bobby Jindal launched a presidential exploratory committee today, because hey, that’s what you do. Presumably he’ll be exploring outside the state he governs, because as much as Louisianans hate Democrats and Obummer, they hate Bobby more, a new poll shows.

Faithful Gawker readers and generally literate Americans already know Marco Rubio is a mouth-breathing spoiled moron who will not be president. But do they know the glorious ways in which he illustrated his crass ineptitude and cynicism this week? Let us count them:

“I do not come to you tonight with the ability to speak Spanish,” Mike Huckabee, once and future presidential pork product, told a Hispanic group in a speech Wednesday night. “But I do speak a common language. I speak Jesus.”

Since making national headlines last summer—after police officer Darren Wilson shot unarmed black teen Michael Brown—Ferguson will hold its first election Tuesday: three city council seats are up for grabs.

A Tea Party Republican House candidate and author of the self-published sci-fi novel "George Buchanan Enters the Wormhole" vows to stop all immigration into the U.S. because immigrants vote for "big government." It's an improvement on his deportation plan, "Operation Wetback."