Finally, a way to dignify the experience of sitting around farting in your pants: Meet Subtle Butt, the odor-eating butt patch. "I use them on airplanes, after a chili meal, and even on my dog," says its evangelistic creator.
There is a certain kind of child who always has sticky red popsicle slush dribbling down his chin. Everyone blames farts and lice outbreaks on him. How did ex-certified hottie Jessica Simpson become Hollywood's version of that kid?
Jessica Simpson does not brush her teeth. Like, ever. The Celebrity Industrial Complex thinks this is big news you want to know. Really, do we have nothing else to talk about?
Sometimes, you've got to know when you've been bested. Ladies and gentleman, without further adieu, EdBassMaster: " You better not sniff, better not try, don't even breathe, I'm tellin' you why: farting Santa's coming to town."
We couldn't help but note this Craigslist post that Gowanus Lounge unearthed, because, let's face it, we've all been in those awkward situations where people are complaining, loudly, about how nasty somewhere smells and you can't help but walk away very slowly, knowing that you've left an unmistakable trail behind…
