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New York, 1:02 PM
Wed Nov 25
49 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #fear more →

    Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"

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    Image of Richard Lawson Richard Lawson
    11/22/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    The Great Heap, Forward.
     Reply
    Richard Lawson was starred Richard Lawson was unstarred
    Image of lionel-mandrake lionel-mandrake
    11/22/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    Glenn Beck would never be stupid enough to run for office for these reasons:

    1) The hemmorhoid surgery meltdown, the substance abuse problems, all that stuff will get dragged out ad nauseum once he steps into the real public arena of a political race. He will get dragged so far through the mud he'll never recover.

    2) If he actually gets elected he'd have to deliver on some of the crazy shit he pretends to believe in.

    3) There's no money in being an elected official.
     Reply
    lionel-mandrake was starred lionel-mandrake was unstarred
    Image of Mo MoDo Mo MoDo
    11/22/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    Muffley: How long would you have to stay down there?

    Strangelove: Well let's see now ah, cobalt thorium, aa... nn... Radioactive halflife of uh,... hmm.. I would think that uh... possibly uh... one hundred years.

    Muffley: You mean, people could actually stay down there for a hundred years?

    Strangelove: It would not be difficult mein Fuhrer!

    [mineshaftgap.net]
     Reply
    Mo MoDo was starred Mo MoDo was unstarred
    Image of Poop Cooper Poop Cooper
    11/22/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    I don't see why everyone is being so skeptical here about Glenn Beck seeing through his 100-year-plan. Obviously, part of Beck's plan is to not die. It's not like he's a charlatan slowly realizing his brand is in need of a new way of monetizing itself due to a lack of advertisers or something.
     Reply
    Poop Cooper was starred Poop Cooper was unstarred
    Image of braak: You are, as usual, completely correct. braak: You are, as usual, completely correct.
    11/22/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    Good news, everyone! With my 100-year plan, I'll never have to actually deliver on any of my schemes! It'll be your children that have to sort through the detritus of the failed Beck prophecies, and I'll be long dead by then--also, buried beneath a gigantic golden sculpture of my own pudgy face!
     Reply
    braak: You are, as usual, completely correct. was starred braak: You are, as usual, completely correct. was unstarred
    Image of Volsciana Volsciana
    11/22/09


    @braak: You are, as usual, completely correct.: Mini Glenn! oh the horror...
     Reply
    Edited by Volsciana at 11/22/09 11:00 AM Volsciana was starred Volsciana was unstarred
    Image of If_I_Had_a_Poodle If_I_Had_a_Poodle
    11/21/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    @Foster Kamer: Tremendous takedown.

    This should be the answer to pretty much anything a GOP politician says: "We call those cults"
     Reply
    Edited by If_I_Had_a_Poodle at 11/21/09 10:23 PM If_I_Had_a_Poodle was starred If_I_Had_a_Poodle was unstarred
    Image of Helio Helio
    11/21/09

    @If_I_Had_a_Poodle: i second this heartily. Excellent piece, Foster.
     Reply
    Helio was starred Helio was unstarred
    Image of Foster Kamer Foster Kamer
    11/21/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    By the way, that image above - aside from my dutiful filling in of what's parenthetically implied - is actually the image on Beck's site. Not joking.
     Reply
    Foster Kamer was starred Foster Kamer was unstarred
    Image of hughman hughman
    11/21/09

    @Foster Kamer: i never realized the washington monument sat right behind the white house. or does he think they're cremation chimneys?
     Reply
    hughman was starred hughman was unstarred
    Image of DennyCrane DennyCrane
    11/21/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    MY TWO-MINUTE, ONE-STEP PLAN FOR GLENN BECK:
    1) Jump into fire.
     Reply
    DennyCrane was starred DennyCrane was unstarred
    Image of Lysergic Asset Lysergic Asset
    11/21/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    We're all laughing now, but it's not going to be funny if these folks are in charge:
     Reply
    Lysergic Asset was starred Lysergic Asset was unstarred
    Image of Lysergic Asset Lysergic Asset
    11/21/09

    @Lysergic Asset: 2nd try for YouTube embed...
     Reply
    Lysergic Asset was starred Lysergic Asset was unstarred
    Image of Trai_Dep Trai_Dep
    11/21/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    I think the first iteration of this movement was much more stirring, original and effective. Fueled by classic idioms like Work Shall Set You Free, We Need Breathing Room and Lightning War, they set loins a-quivering so much better. To say nothing of their far superior costume designers.
    It's comparing fresh-squeezed to Tang, really.
     Reply
    Edited by Trai_Dep at 11/21/09 8:24 PM Trai_Dep was starred Trai_Dep was unstarred
    Image of kappakappaspankme kappakappaspankme
    11/21/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    Wot? A new world order? O.O
     Reply
    kappakappaspankme was starred kappakappaspankme was unstarred
    Image of SaraRueful SaraRueful
    11/21/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    "limited government, maximum freedom"

    Whoa, so Beck is pro-choice and in favor of letting any consenting adult marry? I might have to rethink this guy!
     Reply
    SaraRueful was starred SaraRueful was unstarred
    Image of Lysergic Asset Lysergic Asset
    11/21/09

    @SaraRueful: To paraphrase Jon Stewart, the Republicans are only opposed to government when the Democrats are in charge.
     Reply
    Lysergic Asset was starred Lysergic Asset was unstarred
    Image of sarrible sarrible
    11/21/09

    @Lysergic Asset: And they don't want the government coming between you and your doctor unless you're a woman.
     Reply
    sarrible was starred sarrible was unstarred
    Image of Lysergic Asset Lysergic Asset
    11/21/09

    @sarrible: Zing! There was a post this week on Gawker about a pill for female arousal, and they quoted a male doctor as saying it was unnecessary, because lack of desire is natural as women get older. (Oh, the irony.) Oh, and some health insurance covers Viagra, but not contraception. Bring on the babies! Just don't expect us to feed, clothe or shelter them.

    #tips
     Reply
    Lysergic Asset was starred Lysergic Asset was unstarred
    Image of sarrible sarrible
    11/21/09

    @Lysergic Asset: Yeah, I couldn't find the energy to muster up a "fuck you" for that doctor when the post ran. Although now I'd like to say that I hope his dick rots and falls off.
     Reply
    sarrible was starred sarrible was unstarred
    Image of BettyCrocker BettyCrocker
    11/21/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    If Beck is so damn patriotic, why doesn't he do something really spectacular, like catapult himself into space with 4 roman candles jammed up his hoo-ha?

    I have a match.
     Reply
    BettyCrocker was starred BettyCrocker was unstarred
    Image of CumaeanSibyl CumaeanSibyl
    11/21/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    Yes, Glenn let's all take a great leap forward into the libertarian future.
     Reply
    CumaeanSibyl was starred CumaeanSibyl was unstarred
    Image of limber limber
    11/21/09

    In reply to Glenn Beck's Scary Blueprint for World Domination in 2010, Unveiled: "The Plan"
    "His entire multimedia empire is predicated on one, long, 100-year plot arc: that the main character will make viewers'/listeners'/readers' lives better so long as they're with him every step of the way. The man will make references to revolution, to change, to bringing everything back to a fundamental state."

    Do the Scientologists know Glenn Beck is stealing from them so flagrantly? Launch Tommy Davis! Tommy Davis v. Glenn Beck, for my amusement!
     Reply
    limber was starred limber was unstarred
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