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  • Allen Stanford

    Noble Cricket Patron Indicted in Big Mix-Up

    Cricket-loving billionaire Allen Stanford, dubbed "Mini-Madoff" by hypemongers like us after allegedly scamming $8 billion from investors in a Ponzi scheme, has finally been indicted. He surrendered to the Feds late yesterday. Of course, he is innocent. More »
    06/19/09
    1,163
    29

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by NinaHagen: Honestly, I just read the VF piece on this guy and I am so sad I did not start a... 8 Responses | Other threads

  • finance

    Obama Set to Announce Wall Street Regulatory Overhaul

    In an effort to prevent some of the events that led to the financial crisis in the future, the White House will unveil a sweeping overhaul of the nation's financial regulatory system tomorrow. Suck it Wall Street! More »
    06/16/09
    1,762
    37

    By The Cajun Boy

    Comment by ellagood: oh, it's going to be a banner day at fox news for sure.we are certainly entering an era of "communism/socialism"... 10 Responses | Other threads

  • mo money mo problems

    Kiss The Ring: Bank Of America Takes Mercy On Their Pitiful, Ant-Like, Broke Customers

    The seemingly-populist, very evil Bank of America is a hive of rat bastards, and anyone that's ever done any kind of business with them will understand this sentiment. But they're now taking mercy on their sad, recession-hit customers. More »
    06/13/09
    8,566
    41

    By Foster Kamer

    Comment by cdmunch: All those little fees are going towards the poorly thought out purchase of Merrill Lynch. They have to make money... 5 Responses | Other threads

  • jobs

    Bankers vs. Spies: A Lifestyle Comparison

    The CIA is looking to hire a few good former hedge funders and investment bankers to put their "skills" to use on behalf of the USA. But could I-bankers really stand the rigors of the CIA lifestyle? Let's compare: More »
    05/28/09
    3,854
    8

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by moochyshuckworth: CIA: Work hard to keep identity quiet and remain anonymous Bankers: Do not. you think the man in the four thousand dollar... 3 Responses | Other threads

  • fecal matters

    Merrill Lynch Employees Pooping All Over Office Again

    In January of 2008 a disgruntled Merrill Lynch employee, outraged over his bonus, took a crap on the floor, stomped in it, and proceeded to track it around the office. Now it's apparently happened again. More »
    05/17/09
    14,148
    31

    By The Cajun Boy

    Comment by PrissyCatheadBiscuit: It just got me thinking...I would love to put poop through the drop slot of my horrid former employer. It... 3 Responses | Other threads

  • newspapers

    Who Will Save the NYT From its Saviors?

    So far the possible financial saviors of the New York Times are a shady Mexican billionaire, a shady Hollywood billionaire, and a plan to give free t-shirts to anyone who donates. Anyone see a problem? More »
    05/15/09
    1,409
    16

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by i'm a bottle: God that meter system would really annoy the shit out of me. 7 Responses | Other threads

  • recessionomics

    Nowhere Left to Hide Your Money (If You Have Any)

    The Way We Live Now: Trapped by our dwindling wealth. Wherefore the rich? Europe is facing a bad recession. Overseas tax havens are being shut down. And Wall Street traders just sit around watching DVDs. More »
    05/04/09
    2,995
    27

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by son of spam: What-the-fuck-ever. I must be the only guy in New York who didn't tag the Hipster Grifter. Damn! 11 Responses | Other threads

  • recessionomics

    Pig Soup For The Soul

    The Way We Live Now: Panicky! Swine flu is happening so sell your stocks, for some reason! Japan is shrinking! The good grocery store went out of business! Where will we buy our 'Recession soup?' More »
    04/27/09
    3,607
    20

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by lucasuperior: Hami, darling. "...write after I finished writing this." Also, that picture makes me throw up. 3 Responses | Other threads

  • recessionomics

    Destitute Antelopes Looking for Crime Partners

    The Way We Live Now: Fleeing the police, on foot. Who can afford cars? Let them all go bankrupt. All we need for our ATM robberies are a crowbar and a laid-off blesbok, for distraction. More »
    04/24/09
    1,228
    9

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Nesbiteme: Ha, ha, ha, these zoos, they are so stupid.Yo G, Train the lemurs to go out at night and use... 1 Responses | Other threads

  • updates

    Freddie Mac Wanted Suicide CFO To Relax

    David Kellerman, the Freddie Mac CFO who committed suicide this week, was told by HR to take some time off from work, shortly before he killed himself. The "job stress" scenario looks ever more likely. More »
    04/24/09
    5,421
    34

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Cheap Shot: NOt to cheapen his death but I haven't had a vacation for quite sometime and I know others out there... 7 Responses | Other threads

  • trendwatch

    Laid-Off Finance Guys Bringing Some Order to This Whole 'Homemaking' Thing

    Men who were problem-solving machines in finance have been laid off, and are now forced to do "family" activities. Silver lining: finally some dudes with real smarts to clean up these "PTA meetings" and shit! More »
    04/23/09
    7,144
    70

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by ADismalScience: I cook, clean, pay bills, do laundry, mop floors, clean bathrooms, organize closets, dust surfaces, vacuum carpets, scrub counters, and... 10 Responses | Other threads

  • updates

    Freddie Mac Suicide CFO's Stressful Career

    The media's had a good half day now to find out more about David Kellerman, the Freddie Mac CFO who committed suicide early this morning. He hung himself. The "job stress" scenario is looking plausible: More »
    04/22/09
    12,184
    49

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Tenbinzan: I feel like a bit of ass for nit-picking on such a sad and grim post as this, but .... 7 Responses | Other threads

  • death

    Chief Financial Officer of Freddie Mac Commits Suicide

    David Kellerman, the chief financial officer of money-bleeding mortgage firm Freddie Mac, was found dead in his Virginia home this morning. He'd apparently committed suicide. The financial crisis would be one obvious possible motive. More »
    04/22/09
    18,580
    57

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by gawkimo: The "culture warriors" will not doubt lay the blame on smug liberal intolerance. 6 Responses | Other threads

  • denials

    'Allen Stanford Has Set Out to Defraud...No One'

    Mini-Madoff Allen Stanford, charged with Ponzi scheming his investors out of $8 billion, denies everything. He's a patsy! And so nervous that he just says random words that he thinks may form a denial-like statement: More »
    04/21/09
    1,992
    13

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by BadUncle: What were the rates of return he paid on these CDs (when he paid them)? more » | Other threads

  • recessionomics

    Big Banks Are Back!

    Break out the bubbly and bring back the bottle service, because the huge banks that nearly collapsed on themselves in a terrifying Domino Effect of Financial Doom are back in the black, baby! More »
    04/17/09
    2,799
    21

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by morninggloria: The demise of mark to market accounting bodes well for me as well as banks. For example, I am now... 7 Responses | Other threads

  • internal memos

    Can Marc Ecko Pay His Rent? (Updated)

    Last month it was widely reported that free-spending, once-cool designer Marc Ecko's empire was on the verge of bankruptcy. Today, we scored an internal memo from Ecko (kind of) reassuring his employees. And another rumor! More »
    04/08/09
    6,127
    12

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Felix Kim Colon: who wears Ecko fashionably anymore anyway? 2 Responses | Other threads

  • recessionomics

    America's Having a Trillion-Dollar Sale

    The slack economy is costing America more than $1 trillion per year in lost output. But there's an upside: Great deals, on everything! More »
    04/07/09
    4,576
    13

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Zanzibar Buck-Buck McFate: I hear tell even Members Only jackets are way cheap. 1 Responses | Other threads

  • classic ads

    Drink Your Bitters: AIG's Ads From the Good Old Days

    You know what you don't see much any more? Those supremely reassuring AIG TV commercials. They've disappeared, for some reason. Luckily astute (and bitter) people have preserved them on the internet! More »
    03/25/09
    2,670
    15

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Aaron Altman: Isn't the voiceover C.J. Cregg from The West Wing? 5 Responses | Other threads

  • money matters

    Investor Saves American Apparel From Financial Doom

    You might think that American Apparel would thrive in the recession, with their affordable clothes and dirtbag-embracing ads. But you'd be wrong, since an investor just rescued them from defaulting on a loan. More »
    03/13/09
    3,355
    18

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by DennyCrane: AA stock: $2 Price of AA knitted cap: $16.50 4 Responses | Other threads

  • solutions

    "Banks That Spent the Most on TV Ads Performed the Best." Crisis: Solved.

    03/12/09
    214
    1
  • revenge

    Elie Wiesel is Pissed

    Elie Wiesel, author, survivor, voice of morality, expert on evil, has found someone he'd like locked up and tortured for crimes against humanity: Bernie Madoff, who took all his money. More »
    02/27/09
    7,743
    68

    By Pareene

    Comment by ADismalScience: We've had what, two book deals, some columns, ed-ops, and hundreds of television appearances now? Oh, how crime becomes real... 15 Responses | Other threads

  • recessionomics

    Poor Annie Leibovitz Has Pawned All Her Photos

    We knew that celebrity photographer Annie Leibovitz had some serious financial problems. But we didn't know they were so bad that she had to sign over all of her photos to a pawn shop: More »
    02/24/09
    40,312
    125

    By Hamilton Nolan
  • Crazy notions

    The Daily Beast Trying to Make Money?

    What's this, Tina Brown's internet project The Daily Beast is trying to get a business model? I thought it was all just for kicks! Nevertheless, the Beast is considering selling some "advertisements." While staying pure: More »
    02/12/09
    3,207
    18

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Aaron Altman: SPONSORED POST This special edition of (BEAUTY AND) THE DAILY BEAST is brought to you by LANCOME and HERBAL ESSENCES 4 Responses | Other threads

  • field guide

    How to Write Fake Recession Trend Stories

    Is the bad economy a turn-on, or a turn-off? With a fake recession trend story, either can be true! Just study this easy guide to manufacturing trends in these tough times. Everybody's doing it: More »
    02/12/09
    5,270
    44

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by BookishLookish: Re: 3, I was able to track down three hot Puerto Rican boys and a can of Coco Loco last... 7 Responses | Other threads

  • media

    The Bad New Math of Saving Newspapers

    This is the year of new ideas for saving newspapers! Unfortunately, the main solutions seem to be plagued the one thing that led most people into journalism in the first place: lack of math skills. More »
    02/10/09
    3,343
    25

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Terrafractal: -Cut half the op-ed columnists and fill extra page space with naked pictures of prominent politicians -replace ink with blood of... 3 Responses | Other threads

  • the end

    Fact-Checking Today's Apocalyptic Market Crash

    "Reinhardt," the internet conspiracy theorist who correctly predicted the crash of 2008, warned us that it was "100% sure thing market begins huge downfall" on February 9, 2009. That's today! How'd that one hold up? More »
    02/09/09
    14,279
    41

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by ADismalScience: Of course, depending on Geithner's genius strat tomorrow it could wind up being eerily accurate. If he reprises his Lehman... 13 Responses | Other threads

  • newspapers

    New York Times Doing Just Fine, Reports New York Times

    Today the NYT takes a crack at reporting on its own finances. But an editor accidentally titles it "Resilient Strategy for Times Despite Toll of a Recession," rather than "A Laundry List of Horrible Mistakes": More »
    02/09/09
    1,703
    3

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Perhaps Not: Folksy Sex Troll: Is this the first time they've ever cut back? more » | Other threads

  • journalismism

    Marketwatch Recommends: Do Whatever You Want

    Most popular story on Marketwatch right now: Why it's a bad idea to buy a home. #2 story: Why it's a good idea to buy a home. Written by: the same reporter. Americans: suckers.
    02/06/09
    2,370
    12

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by FreddieBietzsche: It is a good time to buy a home when you or you and your sig oth 1) need more... 5 Responses | Other threads

  • trophy lives

    Help the 'Dating a Banker' Girls Name Their Horrible Book

    Those gold-digging "DABA" girls, the ones who're complaining about their impotent, newly-out-of-work banker boyfriends in the New York Times, have become overnight successes. All by themselves! They've gone and snagged a book deal. More »
    01/28/09
    17,159
    157

    By Richard Lawson

    Comment by ADismalScience: The only book I want to read with these characters is American Psycho 2. 8 Responses | Other threads

  • money matters

    New York Times Finances: A Bleak Pit of Despair

    The New York Times Co. released its fourth quarter financial results this morning. They are bad, bad, bad, and apparently without any upside on any front anywhere. Observe: More »
    01/28/09
    4,439
    28

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by mypupmaxigirl: Here are a few cost cutting ideas that wouldn't be missed: Thursday style section Maureen Dowd. 6 Responses | Other threads

  • dating

    Fashion Meets Finance, Is Bored

    How was the hellish "Fashion Meets Finance" gold-diggers-meet-broken-men dating event last night? The New York Press' Matt Harvey went to find out! And apparently found an Andre Sparkling Wine commercial, circa 1998: More »
    01/23/09
    23,346
    97

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Hamilton Nolan: I got this picture from Google but it summed up how I imagine the event. 10 Responses | Other threads

  • liz claman

    Friendly Reporter With Small Vocabulary Finds Home At Fox Biz

    Nobody watches Fox Business Network, but that doesn't stop them from landing the best business journalists in the game. Like Liz Claman, who split from CNBC because they used too many fancy "business" words: More »
    01/05/09
    8,381
    40

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Rasselas: "If you want a picture of the future of financial television news, imagine a pair of breasts smothering a human... 4 Responses | Other threads

  • media

    2009 Adpocalypse Kicks Off On Schedule

    Good morning sunshine! It's January, which means the horrible media advertising apocalypse has now begun. But not to worry, media lovers; it's only affecting every famous book, magazine, and newspaper publisher: More »
    01/05/09
    4,035
    18

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by lionel-mandrake: Inaccurate, overheated and hysterical as usual. Things are fine in my neck of the "media" world. God, this story is as tiresome... 1 Responses | Other threads

  • Love Guv

    Spitzer Scammed By Madoff Too, Naturally

    The foible-filled comeback of Eliot Spitzer continues! It turns out the luv guv—who does know about Wall Street—lost money to hedge fund scammer Bernie Madoff, like everyone else. And it's Slate's fault!: More »
    12/19/08
    2,972
    17

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by TheHonJudgeSmails: Put this sanctimonious prick in jail. Why isn't he being prosecuted with the fervor with which he himself prosecuted... 6 Responses | Other threads

  • Bernie Madoff

    Wall Street Scammer Said Scams 'Impossible'

    The financial sector is heavily and sufficiently regulated! It's a familiar refrain, but last year it was coming from rich-people-ponzi-scheme operator Bernie Madoff, who added that financial criminals were always caught very quickly. More »
    12/17/08
    3,434
    17

    By Ryan Tate

    Comment by Btwbfdimho: 2 Responses | Other threads

  • crime

    Bernie Madoff's Impossible 'Investment Strategy'

    Everybody knows what Bernie Madoff did—hustle a lot of people out of $50 billion. But nobody's really explained how he did it. Now we're finding out his purported "strategy" was obviously fake. More »
    12/16/08
    8,331
    69

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by bishplz: "Easy to say in hindsight" - you could have just stopped there. A large number of his investors were... 18 Responses | Other threads

  • crime

    If You Don't Buy This Stock, We'll Kill This Dog

    Execs at the National Lampoon are charged with illegally inflating the company's stock price, which leads to a blogger making a predictable joke. Comedy sucks these days. [TheStreet.com]
    12/15/08
    1,818
    17

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by TheHonJudgeSmails: But what about all those awesome National Lampoon movies that have been made over the past 6 or 7 years? 4 Responses | Other threads

  • rants

    Idiot Businessmen, Stop Blaming Goddamned 'Perfect Storms' for Your Incompetence

    Oh God SHUT UP: Your company/industry/economy did not fail because of a "perfect storm," a chance, disastrous combination of outside events. It failed because you sucked! More »
    12/15/08
    5,150
    37

    By Ryan Tate

    Comment by Pope John Peeps II: When I overuse cliche, it's because I'm victim of a perfect storm of burning the candle at both ends of... 7 Responses | Other threads

  • Bernie Madoff

    Hedge Fund Hustler Roundup: The Rich Now Poor

    Time for an up-to-date roundup on the nifty story of Bernie Madoff, the Wall Street titan accused yesterday of running a $50 billion Ponzi scheme. Bathrobes! Big shots! And plenty of broke Jews, below! More »
    12/13/08
    17,043
    72

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by SinisterRouge: "They have nothing left but their apartments or homes - which they are going to have to sell to... 31 Responses | Other threads

  • tribune

    Did Blago Help Push Tribune Into Bankruptcy?

    Let us not, at this crucial moment, forget how much shit the Tribune Co. is in. Executives at the Tribune Co. are quite literally wading to work today through rivers of bad news—deep, deep rivers. Yesterday they freaking went bankrupt. Today they find themselves smack dab in the middle of Gov. ROD BLAGOJEVICH's outrageous corruption scandal—because gnomish asshole Tribune CEO Sam Zell allegedly agreed in principle to fire a troublesome editorial page editor in exchange for $100 million in state money. Obvious question: Did Blago's corrupt scheme help drive Tribune into bankruptcy? We examine THE FACTS for you below! More »
    12/09/08
    2,137
    26

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by J-No: The only thing more frightening than Zell's picture is the sound of his voice. 5 Responses | Other threads

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