The Strong Buzz [4th item] via Grub Street

I am not a hipster, I'm a fat man. It was pretty fucking amazing Berkshire pork. The broth alone was worth the wait. Having to listen to some out of towner complain about not having their own personal table, and with this business model they'll never make it: priceless.

i say yes. it's worth the wait. granted it is ramen, but not like any ramen a college kid cooked up on a covert hot plate in their dorm. those berkshire pork buns are some of the best things to ever hit my lips.

I finally made it down to Momofuku about a month ago and it was by all means, worth the hour wait I endured. Service at the bar was mediocre at best, but you don't care once you take a bite of their steamed buns (I had mine with chicken). It is by far the best food I have eaten in a while. You see the look of pure bliss on everyone's faces as they take a bite of their meals.

The new place (Momofuku Ssam Bar) on 13th & 2nd is good early as well (those Ssams/burrito things do rock [get them with the white kimchi] + they have the same steamed buns as First Ave.) early, but their focus is on their 10:00 - 2:00 a.m. crowd, which again, brings to mind packs of the same idiots standing on First Ave, only drunk. Ewww. BUT, rescue is on the way: Momofuku is "offering delivery in the near future."

I had an actual ARGUMENT with the one of the line cooks about pigtails. Me: Pigtails are curly. Surly Line Cook: No they are not. What the?

The disturbing part . . . came when I went to eat my leftovers the next day— it had all congealed into one giant, quart-sized white lump of pork grease with all the ingredients suspended in it. Even when I tried to microwave that shit down to broth, it just loosened up on the noodles...but never quite turned back into liquid.

I will say this about chef-owner David Chang — unlike so many of his douche-y colleagues, he is humble and honest and the first one to claim that his place is overrated and that he is not as good a cook as the people who trained him. I think he has even put a note on the door that says as much. His food tastes good and it would be a shame if people were to backlash on him because of all the douchetards who crowd his restaurants.

Fuck. Now it's going to be even more of a pain to get a table at Nobu.

Ex-Waitress Swats Back, Suing Megu for Sex Harassment [NYM]

According to GQ epicurean Alan Richman, Shanken admitted his tipping cruelty in the latest issue of Wine Spectator:

The purpose of his declaration, ostensibly, was to encourage a lively discussion of tipping. Such a dialogue could have been useful, but what he really did was proclaim himself one of the most loathed of restaurant patrons, a rich guy who stiffs the help.

But for the sake of editorial! Are we to believe that his server cannot appreciate sacrifice for the sake of thought-provoking editorial content? What's the harm of collecting a few food stamps in the grand scheme of quality bon vivant literature?

Big Tipper [BlogGQ]

When Adams' beloved yorkshire terrier Jazzy died from diarrhea, Adams made it very known that she would lie on her floor and hand-feed the dog kosher chicken from Le Cirque; when she took the thing to the actual restaurant, Jazzy ate off of Limoges porcelain. So you can be sure Cindy will be in attendance, along with her replacement yorkies Jazzy III and Juicey — there's no way they can open the place without first letting that woman's dogs shit all over a leather banquette.

In Dress Rehearsals, Le Cirque Prepares for Its Third Act

No worries, though, because Michael's is still open. When asked if any of the scheduled immigration rallies would be affecting their lunch schedule, the chipper hostess practically laughed at the idea. Makes sense — if you've gotten a job at Michael's, you're already bleached on the inside.

UPDATE: Readers report that Florent and Pump at 31st Street are closed for today; Chat 'n' Chew will not be chewing, though it's still open.

Related: Day Without Immigrants [1010 WINS]

NOTE FROM NELLO BALAN

MAIESTATE TANTUM
A NECK HARDENED FROM
700 YEARS OF NOBILITY

COMPARE TO

A VENOMOUS
LIMBLESS AND SOFT
OPHIDIAN NECK

Uh, would you like a side of coherence with your crazy? Now we haven't seen the actual page, so if you've not yet used the paper to line the litterbox, please do send us a scan. As for deciphering the above jibberish, we figure this has something to do with Balan's claim that he's a descendent of Vlad the Impaler. The ad, then, is a form of public defense: it's because of his hard-necked heritage that he keeps beating his girlfriend. See? Not his fault.

[Image via New York Social Diary]

Is everything OK over there? We don't mean to pry, but we were reading the Real Estate blog and noted that managing editor Tom McGeveran had a published a 400-word diatribe on the appropriate use of cheese. "Is it too middle-American to declare that cheese, even if it is a last course, cannot be a substitute for dessert?" he writes. Alright, fine, a good question. But why is it on the real estate blog? It seems more appropriate for the Bridal Blog (dairy at the wedding reception is always an issue) or, say, Frank Bruni's LiveJournal.

But, dammit, the Observer is smart — there's got to be a logical explanation to this. So, uh, maybe McGeveran was pushed over the edge by a cheese article in Domino, which is a magalog for the home, and decorating your home is kind of related to New York real estate because once you buy property you have to buy stuff and...

Fuck it. Next up on the Real Estate, Tom works out his lingering issues with twist-top wine bottles.

Let Me Eat Cake [The Real Estate]

Buddakazam! Kalina Gets Inside [Eater]
Food Buzz [Bloomberg]
Yelping Warriors, and Rocks in the Broth [NYT]

Yeah, not so much. On all counts. No glitz, no glamour, no real style or design to the place whatsoever (save for the venue's ceiling, pictured above, which rivals that of the Sistine Chapel). Not even the coziness of Rao's — just leather banquettes, an out-of-sorts chandelier in the entryway, and a hefty dose of wall sconces. We couldn't help but wonder if someone like Timberlake would even go to a restaurant like this: very Little Italy, very high-end Sopranos.

Wait, the food. Yes, technically Destino is about food. We give it an "eh" or so: good meatballs, bad clams. Pasta decent, but overpriced. Everything was eaten with fork (for you, Hesser, all for you). The rest was sort of unremarkable, which made us rather sad for having ventured so far from our typical environs. But the wine was good, and the servers were attentive...and that's about the best we can muster for an Adam Platt imitation.

We can do a much better Frank Bruni impression, however. We're a bit embarrassed to even note this, but we couldn't stop singing along to the music being piped through the dining room. Stand-outs included Wilson-Phillips' Hold On, I Got the Power by Snap, and our personal favorite, the Nelson twins' timeless classic, Love and Affection. Honestly, it was like they had stolen our iPod and given it wings.

One highlight: Lizzie Grubman is repping the restaurant, meaning that even if it's just an average venue, you'll continue to hear about it 'til no end. We caught a look at her engagement ring, which is as huge as is to be expected. Naturally, anything less would be white trash.

Earlier: Justin Timberlake to Open Restaurant Hell