The new anchor is Laurence Ferrari, whom the Telegraph describes as "an experienced anchorwoman and recently voted France's most glamorous journalist." Here's the funny thing: the old guy, Patrick Poivre d'Arvor, did not make friends with President Sarkozy when he called him a "little boy" a while back. Ferrari, on the other hand, has had to deny rumors of an affair with Sarkozy that supposedly took place before he met his wife Carla Bruni.

And Sarkozy is good buddies with the head of the network, who was a witness at the wedding and is a godfather to Sarkozy's son.

So basically this is like if Barack Obama was good friends with CBS head Sumner Redstone, and had convinced him to replace genial old Bob Sheiffer with Katie Couric, whom he allegedly had had an affair with.

Or like if Bush had gotten rid of Dan Rather. And had had an affair with Bob Sheiffer?

Anyway, scandal!

French TV turmoil as 'Sarkozy's glamorous blonde' takes limelight [Telegraph]

The AP: "The French parliament's lower house adopted a groundbreaking bill Tuesday that would make it illegal for anyone — including fashion magazines, advertisers and Web sites — to publicly incite extreme thinness." Incite thinness? How does one even do that? Catchy slogan? Throw a salad through the window of a pizza place? What happened to liberté!

Now the bill heads to the Senate. They say it mainly targets pro-anorexia websites and message boards, but the fashion industry is worried about the language of the bill. Of course, they don't have to worry about imprisonment, as no jail can hold such gorgeously thin people.

Still, this represents yet another attack on the American Way of Life, which is inciting extreme thinness while acting on delicious processed foods.

First, Grainge Googles Bruni and is blown away by her photos. He offers to walk her around his neighborhood! For journalistic purposes.

"Modelling is using the body and only the body."

Which is my opportunity to say: "And you have a beautiful one, I might add."

"Thank you," she stutters, laughing. I'm clearly a sleazebag. Professionalism is dwindling. She then compares making music to the process of attraction.

"When you're attracted to someone, it's hard to explain, you can say you're attracted to this girl 'cause she is pretty, intelligent and charming..."

"You have all those qualities, Carla," I interrupt to gush. "Thank you, I'm liking this interview very much," she says. "You're almost like an Italian man."

Yes, a sleazy Italian man. The interview is cut short, and Bruni calls back 15 minutes later.

I dive straight in. "Your album cover is you sitting on a cushion reading a book in a frock. Were you wearing any knickers at the time?"

Way to get to the bottom of the situation, haha! Or should I say, way to get to the vagina of the situation, haha. Grainge's entire story reads like a buddy telling you how much that stripper really liked him at the strip club last night. At the end, Bruni gives him her number, but somehow, a romance never flourishes:

Unfortunately, Carla never did call. And when I texted her she didn't reply. The next thing I heard she was going out with the President of France.

[photo via Christie's]

According to the study, one-fifth of all French men between the ages of 18-24 have "no interest in sexual or romantic activity whatever." This is presented without any real explanation. And I can think of none, except some unrelated stock jokes about the French being punks. They totally chickened out in WW2!

That number is baffling. Without having a detailed comprehensive study of American sexuality sitting in front of me, I'd be astounded if that number in the US was even 10%. The report also found that the rate of abstinence among French men 18-35 is more than 6%, versus only 3.5% for women. The study has been presented in the press, generally, as "French women are totally sex fiends and French men are not!" Which has a grain of truth. But the figures also say that women there report an average of 5 sex partners over the course of their lives, while men have an average of 13. So the weird "disinterest" among a large portion of younger men is just...weird.

Will this lead to a brisk business in virile young men traveling to France to serve as paid concubines for young women whose male counterparts have no interest in satisfying them, in a strange reversed version of the 2005 Charlotte Rampling sex tourism film Heading South? It's impossible to rule out.

When 28-year-old politician Arash Derambarsh joined an unofficial Facebook group called "ePresident," he apparently thought he was running for a real position at the company. He then went to the media, who didn't bother checking the story before introducing him as the country's Facebook president. Which is silly! Facebook would never hire above age 25.

Anyway, French bloggers went nuts, the press retracted, and the Internet once again danced on the corpse of old media, because of course bloggers never get stories wrong.