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New York, 1:45 AM
Sun Dec 20
11 posts in the last 24 hours

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Matt Cherette Matt Cherette
    12/18/09

    In reply to Poetry in the Machine: 'Identity Info Sharing'
    That poem brought a tear to my eye.
     Reply
    Matt Cherette was starred Matt Cherette was unstarred
    Image of BettyCrocker BettyCrocker
    12/18/09

    In reply to Poetry in the Machine: 'Identity Info Sharing'
    Ahem: to the tune of Lady Madonna.

    Lady Computer, info on your board
    Keepin’ track of all I do when I am bored
    Where is my money… GAH! His dick is bent!
    I think this guy on Craisgslist had an accident!

    Friday night I played an app on Facebook
    Sunday morning looked at pornstars buns
    Monday I downloaded me an e-book
    YAY! TitanMen!

    Lady Computer, find me Jersey Shore
    And a clip on YouTube of "PROS-TA-TOO-SHUN WHOOOOOORE!"
    Pa pa pa pa...
    LOLCats are fun!

    Lady Computer – shit my iPod’s dead
    I can’t get Lady Gaga out of my damn head

    Tuesday afternoon I did a spreadsheet
    Wednesday morning Mafia Wars had crashed
    Thursday night I watched Colin Farrell’s lame skeet
    YAY! TitanMen!

    Lady Computer, I truly love you so
    You’ve made it great to be a modern gay homo!
     Reply
    BettyCrocker was starred BettyCrocker was unstarred
    Image of Brian Moylan Brian Moylan
    12/18/09

    @BettyCrocker: TitanMen is no Randy Blue, but otherwise, A+
     Reply
    Brian Moylan was starred Brian Moylan was unstarred
    Image of AndPreciousLittleofThat AndPreciousLittleofThat
    12/18/09

    In reply to Poetry in the Machine: 'Identity Info Sharing'
    Sing it out, cat! I'll be over here, smokin' cigarettes and diggin' your crazy style.
     Reply
    AndPreciousLittleofThat was starred AndPreciousLittleofThat was unstarred
    Image of Arken Arken
    12/18/09

    In reply to Poetry in the Machine: 'Identity Info Sharing'
    I'd be much more impressed if you did it in iambic pentameter.
     Reply
    Arken was starred Arken was unstarred
    Image of Smitros Smitros
    12/18/09

    @Arken: In the spirit of The Matrix, that would make Brian a Neo-formalist.
     Reply
    Smitros was starred Smitros was unstarred
    Image of Uncle_Billy_Slumming Uncle_Billy_Slumming
    12/18/09

    @Arken: I'd be happy with a perky monometer.

    Let's get the ol' juices flowing. Eww. Ok...

    Here's a little ditty I just threw together:

    Rime the rack of finest wits,
    That expresseth but by fits,
    True Conceit.
    Spoyling Senses of their Treasure,
    Cosening Judgement with a measure,
    But false weight.
    Wresting words, from their true calling;
    Propping Verse, for feare of falling
    To the ground.
    Joynting Syllabes, drowning Letters,
    Fastning Vowells, as with fetters
    They were bound!
    Soone as lazie thou wert knowne,
    All good Poetrie hence was flowne,
    And Art banish'd.
    For a thousand yeares together,
    All Pernassus Greene did wither,
    And wit vanish'd.
    Pegasus did flie away,
    At the Wells no Muse did stay,
    But bewail'd.
    So to see the Fountaine drie,
    And Apollo's Musique die,
    All light failed!
    Starveling rimes did fill the Stage,
    Not a Poet in an Age,
    Worth crowning.
    Not a worke deserving Baies,
    Nor a lyne deserving praise,
    Pallas frowning;
    Greeke was free from Rimes infection,
    Happy Greeke by this protection!
    Was not spoyled.
    Whilst the Latin, Queene of Tongues,
    Is not yet free from Rimes wrongs,
    But rests foiled.
    Scarce the hill againe doth flourish,
    Scarce the world a Wit doth nourish,
    To restore,
    Phoebus to his Crowne againe;
    And the Muses to their braine;
    As before.
    Vulgar Languages that want
    Words, and sweetnesse, and be scant
    Of true measure,
    Tyran Rime hath so abused,
    That they long since have refused,
    Other ceasure;
    He that first invented thee,
    May his joynts tormented bee,
    Cramp'd for ever;
    Still may Syllabes jarre with time,
    Still may reason warre with rime,
    Resting never.
    May his Sense when it would meet,
    The cold tumor in his feet,
    Grow unsounder.
    And his Title be long foole,
    That in rearing such a Schoole,
    Was the founder.

    Yours defensively,

    Sonny Benjon
     Reply
    Uncle_Billy_Slumming was starred Uncle_Billy_Slumming was unstarred
    Image of Uncle_Billy_Slumming Uncle_Billy_Slumming
    12/19/09

    @Uncle_Billy_Slumming:

    Get it? "Long foole"?
     Reply
    Uncle_Billy_Slumming was starred Uncle_Billy_Slumming was unstarred
    Image of Poodle_Heart Poodle_Heart
    12/17/09

    In reply to Poetry in the Machine: 'What Does It Mean to Square Something?'
    roses are red
    violets are blue
    aol sucks
    square, yellow or blue
     Reply
    Poodle_Heart was starred Poodle_Heart was unstarred
    Image of Poodle_Heart Poodle_Heart
    12/17/09

    In reply to Poetry in the Machine: 'What Does It Mean to Square Something?'
    art for art's sake

    money, for god's sake
     Reply
    Poodle_Heart was starred Poodle_Heart was unstarred
    Image of TedSez TedSez
    12/17/09

    In reply to Poetry in the Machine: 'What Does It Mean to Square Something?'
    Free porn is good
    Free iPods are better
    Tiger Woods' babes
    Are real go-getters
    Oral Roberts is gone
    And so's Roy Disney
    Avatar will hit you
    Right in the kidney
    Michael Jackson, Twilight,
    Barack Obama,
    You search these terms
    So does your mama
    Swine flu will get you
    Health care can't stop it
    But "sexy nudes"
    Will always top it
    You search for me
    I search for you
    AOL pays nothing
    But you can't sue.
    So be a lawyer,
    Cop, or fighter
    But never, ever
    Become a writer.
     Reply
    TedSez was starred TedSez was unstarred
    Image of Lysergic Asset Lysergic Asset
    12/17/09

    @TedSez: Ha! Fantastic.
     Reply
    Lysergic Asset was starred Lysergic Asset was unstarred
    Image of Uncle_Billy_Slumming Uncle_Billy_Slumming
    12/18/09

    @TedSez:

    Free Verses End-Rhyme, a Pottypome

    I barfed today
    and though
    it was
    colorfu
    l construction and sw
    eetly square, barfitwas.
    Measured angled barfitwas.
     Reply
    Uncle_Billy_Slumming was starred Uncle_Billy_Slumming was unstarred
    Image of Foster Kamer Foster Kamer
    12/17/09

    In reply to Poetry in the Machine: 'What Does It Mean to Square Something?'
    This is so LOL you have no idea. I'm dying.
     Reply
    Foster Kamer was starred Foster Kamer was unstarred
    Image of Brian Moylan Brian Moylan
    12/17/09

    @Foster Kamer: If I get my $30 we're going out for dinner. Cheap dinner. It's only $30 after all.
     Reply
    Brian Moylan was starred Brian Moylan was unstarred
    Image of Lysergic Asset Lysergic Asset
    12/17/09

    @Brian Moylan: Where in Manhattan can you buy dinner for $30? I haven't lived there in 15 years, and I don't recall it being that cheap even then.
     Reply
    Lysergic Asset was starred Lysergic Asset was unstarred
    Image of Brian Moylan Brian Moylan
    12/17/09

    @Lysergic Asset: Popeyes. Mmmmm....
     Reply
    Brian Moylan was starred Brian Moylan was unstarred
    Image of BettyCrocker BettyCrocker
    12/17/09

    In reply to Poetry in the Machine: 'What Does It Mean to Square Something?'
    Why Can’t I Bring My Kitty To Work?

    Her name is Lucy. She and her brother, Edmund
    Don’t take up much room or air
    They both could sleep in my in box, give or take a tail
    But that would leave no place for the mail
    And kitties are not square

    Where would they poop? With a litterbox
    20 miles away – they would look for paper shreddings
    Or a quiet corner to dump in, which we’d hate
    We could shellack it and use it as a paperweight
    But kitty poop is not square

    I say our office needs more angles and curves
    And the way a kitty bends and swerves is just the thing
    To right the squareness of our space
    Tuxedo kitties show good taste
    But our CEO is square. And he wants no kitties there.
     Reply
    BettyCrocker was starred BettyCrocker was unstarred
    Image of Brian Moylan Brian Moylan
    12/17/09

    @BettyCrocker: Send it to Seed. You could get paid!
     Reply
    Brian Moylan was starred Brian Moylan was unstarred
    Image of BettyCrocker BettyCrocker
    12/17/09

    @Brian Moylan: If I do, I'm buying you a huge-assed martini at Traxx in Penn Station. (I'll spend the rest on cat toys.)
     Reply
    BettyCrocker was starred BettyCrocker was unstarred
    Image of Brian Moylan Brian Moylan
    12/17/09

    @BettyCrocker: Fuck that, let's go to the Blue Store on 8th Ave and buy some porn.
     Reply
    Brian Moylan was starred Brian Moylan was unstarred
    Image of BettyCrocker BettyCrocker
    12/17/09

    @Brian Moylan: NOW, you're talkin'!
     Reply
    BettyCrocker was starred BettyCrocker was unstarred
    Image of tongue-tied tongue-tied
    12/17/09

    @BettyCrocker: You won't have enough left over to spend on anything.
     Reply
    BettyCrocker promoted this comment tongue-tied was starred tongue-tied was unstarred
    Image of BettyCrocker BettyCrocker
    12/17/09

    @tongue-tied: Porn HAS gotten pricey. Or did you mean martinis?
     Reply
    BettyCrocker was starred BettyCrocker was unstarred
    Image of tongue-tied tongue-tied
    12/18/09

    @BettyCrocker: Umm, I meant pricey cocktails. Especially huge-assed ones.
     Reply
    tongue-tied was starred tongue-tied was unstarred
    Image of BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit) BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit)
    12/17/09

    In reply to Poetry in the Machine: 'What Does It Mean to Square Something?'
    Seed uses it's mad robot brain to generate story ideas based on what you, yes you, have been searching for on the internet

    So... most of the articles requested are about porn, porn, porn, what is this thing on my butt, porn, shopping, porn, shopping for porn, Tiger Woods, how to make $$$ at home with your computer!!1!...?
     Reply
    BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit) was starred BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit) was unstarred
    Image of Uncle_Billy_Slumming Uncle_Billy_Slumming
    12/17/09

    In reply to Poetry in the Machine: 'What Does It Mean to Square Something?'
    I dunno, but anyone familiar with the inner workings of Windows Vista? I think I'm sitting here watching someone go through my hard drive systematically, remotely.
     Reply
    Uncle_Billy_Slumming was starred Uncle_Billy_Slumming was unstarred
    Image of Spy from the Land of Rainpeople Spy from the Land of Rainpeople
    12/17/09

    @Uncle_Billy_Slumming: Yeah, but it'll cost way more than $30 per assignment.

    Think about it...
     Reply
    Uncle_Billy_Slumming promoted this comment Spy from the Land of Rainpeople was starred Spy from the Land of Rainpeople was unstarred
    Image of Uncle_Billy_Slumming Uncle_Billy_Slumming
    12/17/09

    @Spy from the Land of Rainpeople:

    I love you Spy. In a digital way, of course.
     Reply
    Uncle_Billy_Slumming was starred Uncle_Billy_Slumming was unstarred
    Image of Uncle_Billy_Slumming Uncle_Billy_Slumming
    12/17/09

    @Uncle_Billy_Slumming: btw, if you are a superduper computer security expert, I might have a modest proposal for you. Better than NSA-good, tho. Mossad-good.
     Reply
    Uncle_Billy_Slumming was starred Uncle_Billy_Slumming was unstarred
    Image of Spy from the Land of Rainpeople Spy from the Land of Rainpeople
    12/17/09

    @Uncle_Billy_Slumming: Thanks, Uncle. But I'm a retired spy. These days I never log out of my machine when I leave the office. And almost all the passwords are shared and posted on the bulletin board. I like this much more than the previous gigs.
     Reply
    Uncle_Billy_Slumming promoted this comment Spy from the Land of Rainpeople was starred Spy from the Land of Rainpeople was unstarred
    Image of Uncle_Billy_Slumming Uncle_Billy_Slumming
    12/17/09

    @Spy from the Land of Rainpeople: Okeedoke. To be clear, you'd be on defense. White hat and everything, and not working for the gummint.
     Reply
    Uncle_Billy_Slumming was starred Uncle_Billy_Slumming was unstarred
    Image of Smitros Smitros
    12/17/09

    In reply to Poetry in the Machine: 'What Does It Mean to Square Something?'
    You could work up an anthology of these, like Joe Wenderoth's Letters to Wendy's.
     Reply
    Smitros was starred Smitros was unstarred
    Image of AndPreciousLittleofThat AndPreciousLittleofThat
    12/17/09

    In reply to Poetry in the Machine: 'What Does It Mean to Square Something?'
    I give it two bongos and a beret. Good work!
     Reply
    AndPreciousLittleofThat was starred AndPreciousLittleofThat was unstarred
    Image of Brian Moylan Brian Moylan
    12/17/09

    @AndPreciousLittleofThat: Thank you, sir. A good poem is never finished, just abandoned.
     Reply
    Brian Moylan was starred Brian Moylan was unstarred
    Image of raincoaster raincoaster
    12/16/09

    In reply to Poetry Is Humanity's Only Defense Against the AOL News Borg
    How long till #AOLFlarf is a trending topic on Twitter?
     Reply
    raincoaster was starred raincoaster was unstarred
    Image of Cunning_Linguist Cunning_Linguist
    12/16/09

    In reply to Poetry Is Humanity's Only Defense Against the AOL News Borg
    Whose dick do I have to suck to get this made into a daily feature?
     Reply
    Brian Moylan promoted this comment Edited by Cunning_Linguist at 12/16/09 2:35 PM Cunning_Linguist was starred Cunning_Linguist was unstarred
    Image of Brian Moylan Brian Moylan
    12/16/09

    @Cunning_Linguist: Probably mine. But instead of that, just get everyone to click on it. If it's popular I'll keep writing them.
     Reply
    Brian Moylan was starred Brian Moylan was unstarred
    Image of Cunning_Linguist Cunning_Linguist
    12/17/09

    @Brian Moylan: Well that's certainly easier. Phew.
     Reply
    Cunning_Linguist was starred Cunning_Linguist was unstarred
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