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Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder

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Trixie from Toronto
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
I am totally borrowing elements of this dream from my pal Hortense, but I hope all of her children grow up to be outrageously gay -- Richard Simmons-y for the boys, Chastity Bono-y for the girls -- experiment will all manner of illicit drugs and then open up a late-term abortion clinic and call it "Elisabeth's Place."
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Lysergic Asset
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
Since this isn't Jezebel, I hope I'm allowed to say: she really needs a bra.
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unclevanya
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
Attractive?
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gerbilsoutofexile...is cheap and easy
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
She can't be off the show for too long. Someone needs to support the family, and I don't think her hubby is working too hard.
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lobstr
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
Trust me, the ladies are slipping fertility drugs into Lizbeth's coffee so they can have half a year of calm..

However, I did miss lil miss yappy for Blago's appearance..
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lobstr
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
At first I thought the daisy mention was in reference to the life clocks embedded in everyone's palms in Logan's Run, but in that scenario everyone is bumped off at 30.

still..
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jasonelias
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
I wouldn't be surprised if this child makes her leave the show. She seems beside herself anyway with Obama in office, 75% of her shtick is gone, no W. to carry water for.
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pufflehuff
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
Sigh. What sort of a world do we live in when Hasselbeck procreates thrice, and yet Fortune will not bring forth Tinsley-Topper progeny? Even a tiny JFP in a jar? My soul quakes.
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PandoraSpocks
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
I knew there was something amiss when I read that those octuplets were born in Bellflower, which makes Hoboken look like the Rue du Mont-Blanc. (That last one is for you, Baroness)
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Wrapitup
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
Breeding is the new black.
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Annie Nonymous
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
Spent the morning reading about the California woman who just gave birth to octuplets. Divorced with 6 children already sharing a three bedroom home with the her parents, she opted to have fertility treatments and was implanted with atleast an 8 pack of embryo pops and Viola!

Hasselback having another seems somewhat less offensive by comparison.
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Lysergic Asset
01/31/09

@Ms. P: I'm surprised Gawker hasn't jumped on that story. It is truly bizarre. Most amusing would be if the woman is receiving government handouts for her breeding experiment gone awry. Those poor kids!
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Joshua David Stein
01/31/09

@Lysergic Asset: ok! ok! I'm taking a look now. Just got to the part where he says, "It's half a carat. It reminds me of you." Which isn't entirely a nice way to propose.
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Annie Nonymous
01/31/09

@Lysergic Asset: Honestly, if you can afford to have 14 kids, like say Brangelina, I totally support you doing that. But... a divorced mother, already living at home with her parents, one of whom filed bankruptcy a year or so ago, rly? The stories make it sound as if even her own parents are rolling their eyes. Tote strange
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Squirrelwars
01/31/09

@Ms. P: @Lysergic Asset: @Joshua Stein: If you guys read this story, you'll find out exactly what this woman's mother thinks about this bizarre situation.
[news.yahoo.com]
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PandoraSpocks
01/31/09

@Ms. P: I wanna know who paid for the fertility treatments. IVF can cost up to 40 grand.
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CheetoBurrito
01/31/09

@PandoraSpocks: @Ms. P: I dunno guys, I see where you're coming from but wouldn't that logic also follow that only people within a certain income bracket should have behbehs?
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Colander
01/31/09

@CheetoBurrito: There are a ton of variable that make that different, such as how the babies are conceived, and how many children are already present/whether or not those previous children are being provided for.
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Lysergic Asset
01/31/09

@CheetoBurrito:

I lack the sociological expertise to comment on your hypothesis about income and breeding, so I'll skip that part. This single woman chose to have eight embryos implanted in her after she ALREADY HAD SIX CHILDREN and was living with her insolvent parents. To me, that's odd.
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pufflehuff
01/31/09

@Squirrelwars, PandoraSpocks:: Nadya Suleman wanted to have children since she was a teenager, "but luckily she couldn't," her mother said.

JEEZ LOUISE.
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kitkatsplash
01/31/09

@PandoraSpocks: They weren't conceived by IVF. It's actually kinda worse--they were conceived through implanting embroyos and it's considered unethical (for numerous reasons) to implant 8+ embroyos. Typically in the US, women under 40, get 2 embroyos implanted (maybe 1). Over 40 is the only time that some doctors will consider 3 embroyos.
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kitkatsplash
01/31/09

@Squirrelwars: One of the kids is also austic???!! The 3 year old. And, oh, the mom has a BA and pursuing a masters in counseling? As an LCSW, I beg the state of California, to not give this woman a license. I feel bad but, really, this woman is sick in her head. She also tells people she has money but mom says no. GAWD. This is the best story ever. I want a reality show on this crazy woman produce yesterday! now!
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Seeräuber Jenny
01/31/09

@kitkatsplash:

Is the hospital trying to get into the Guiness Book of Records? I think the Yahoo story said 47 members of the staff were involved in this stunt. How often do we hear about the misuse of expensive medical resources?

I Googled this and found a story of a few days ago in which a hospital doctor was very disingenuous, saying that they were preparing to deliver six babies by Cesarean section and that she was surprised to see an eighth baby emerge.

Somebody lose track of how many embryos were implanted?

I doubt she'll do it, but if the grandmother walked out as she threatened, I really couldn't blame her.

Poor kids.
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kitkatsplash
01/31/09

@Seeräuber Jenny: It's absolutely sick that a doctor would implant 8 embroyos. She's young and healthy by all accounts and she had a successful experience with embroyo implantation in the past. Thus, it was very conceivable that she'd carry at least 5-6 of these babies to term. She wanted a huge multiple birth.
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They Shoot Journalists, Don't They?
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
Kelly Ripa is gonna have to cut a bitch if Hasselbeck doesn't stop challenging her title as Most Fertile Daytime Talk Show Host.
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VoxPopuli
01/31/09

@They Shoot Journalists, Don't They?: Actually, I think Kelly would attack her with a stain remover pen (from Tide®!) instead. Of course, still in an alley and wearing a maniacal grin the whole time and all that.
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pufflehuff
01/31/09

@VoxPopuli: Was Kelly Ripa nicknamed "Grim" at school? Were all of the Ripas? I don't know the woman from Adam, but that woulda been pretty neat!
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VoxPopuli
01/31/09

@King Blago: That would be an excellent name for a wrestler. Come to think of it, so would King Blago.
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pufflehuff
01/31/09

@VoxPopuli:

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VoxPopuli
01/31/09

@King Blago: Excellent. Is that Mickey Rourke under there?
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pufflehuff
01/31/09

@VoxPopuli: As with the real Blago, yes.
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balt
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
At least they won't be old enough to vote for Sarah Palin.
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Lysergic Asset
01/31/09

@balt: She'll still have her base supporters... as long as she's still a (G)GILF in 15 years or so.
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dantebenuto
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
The republicans must be pleased... they just saw their ranks swell again.
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Colander
01/31/09

@dantebenuto: That's assuming her kids don't develop their own opinions at some point.
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freedc
01/31/09

In reply to Hasselbeck Is The View's Designated Breeder
Joshua, did you watch a Very Duggar Wedding? They're making fun of it right now on Best Week Ever, I'm sad I missed that one.
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kitkatsplash
01/31/09

@freedc: Is A Very Duggar Wedding the official title? I'm attempting to DVR but can't find it among the listings. Maybe it's not airing for a while.
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kitkatsplash
01/31/09

@freedc: I love their website. [www.ja20.com]
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seat_5a
01/31/09

@kitkatsplash: The show is called "17 kids and counting" and the name of the episode is a "A Very Duggar Wedding." It's on today, like in an hour (3pm EST), on Discover Health (it's on my listings as DHLTH).

I just got DVR on Tuesday and I am DEFINITELY putting this thing to good use.
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kitkatsplash
01/31/09

@seat_5a: Thanks! I've seen the 17 and 18 kids and counting...CRAZY. Now I have to catch up with the wedding special.
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kitkatsplash
01/31/09

@seat_5a: EWWW....In the vows:

(1) She commits to submitting to his control and guidance

and

(2) Leaving the size of their family up to god.

BDSMish wedding vows, if you ask me.
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