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Don't Worry, No One Watched The City

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BlinkyMcChuck
01/01/09

In reply to Don't Worry, No One Watched The City
I want to see the Bromance first episode for the naked meetings between Jenner and the bro hos.
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Carol Gardens
12/31/08

In reply to Don't Worry, No One Watched The City
These programs are the inevitable result of Brian Graden's rise to the tippy top peak of MTV Networks power, starting back 2000-ish.
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RolandOyster
12/31/08

In reply to Don't Worry, No One Watched The City
This column is a vulgar waste of cyber-space. Gawker is an Ivy-League version of a worthless supermarket tabloid. The only people who like this stuff are rich bored losers and those who envy them.
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Richard Lawson
12/31/08

@RolandOyster: We'll take "an Ivy-League version of a worthless supermarket tabloid" as a compliment, thank you very much.
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GuyBitchy
12/31/08

In reply to Don't Worry, No One Watched The City
I dance on MTV's grave, laughing.

Way to completely destroy an unprecedentedly powerful brand. Ah, ha, ha.... You tools killed the golden goose out of moronic greed, and there's no getting it back now, no getting those stains out of the mattress...

By going for short-term ratings gains, you sabotaged long term viability. It's like someone says to you, you've got a money tree here that will give you $1000 dollars a day forever. You can just be happy with that or... you can add this fertilizer and it will give you $2500 a day, for, well, at least three years, maybe more--although then the tree could get sick and die.

Hey, give me that stinky fertilizer, cried the executive assholes! Let me rub it on my gums... mmmm-mmmm...

You're finished. Enjoy the decline, scum.
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Spirit Fingers
12/31/08

In reply to Don't Worry, No One Watched The City
Can we skip the MTV drivel and bring on The Bad Girl's Club recaps when it returns in Jan? I love Richard's enthusiastic retellings, but I think he'll be better served with a reality show that is so Springer-esque in its bad-for-you-ness that it's like eating spray cheese and Combos, but damn you can't get enough of that crap! Sorry, but MTV is just sad. And at this point who cares really? All these fortunate, blonde girls, yadda, yadda, whatever. Let's see some diversity-embraced, ass-punting, raging, crazy-as-cat-shit, irrational behavior!
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ADismalScience
12/31/08

In reply to Don't Worry, No One Watched The City
I have this vision of the MTV movie awards next year, gilded and unwatched as they are, a stadium-full of psuedo-celebrities in borrowed designer clothing so quiet that you could hear a moonman drop. The host takes the stage and leads with an average monologue that none can bear to laugh at, and as the bombing becomes unbearable the floodgates just collapse. It starts in the back with some D-lister from this unbelievable waste-of-time television program and cascades through the sniffling audience, every tear a monument to the smoldering ruin of MTV's - and, in special individual ways, the participants' - cultural relevance. They will march soberly into the streets, enjoy one last sip of Courvoisier, and retreat into obscurity - left only with the empty longing for validation that defined each of them in youth.
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MattGaymon
12/31/08

@ADismalScience: Or someone could just pull a Chunk-at-the-movie theater.

+ Watch video

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E. H. Cotton
12/31/08

@ADismalScience: Beautiful and moving. Thank you.
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Nice Beaver
12/31/08

In reply to Don't Worry, No One Watched The City
Did you here that, my fellow Whitney Portals? There are 1.6 million of us! Never give up!!!
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EleanorRigby
12/31/08

In reply to Don't Worry, No One Watched The City
More like The Shitty! (hangs head)
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Midwesterner in NYC
12/31/08

In reply to Don't Worry, No One Watched The City
Aren't we all losing MTV and the rest of the Viacom stations as of tomorrow anyway? I lose The Daily Show, but I also lose this show. I think this makes me even-steven.
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BigRiver
12/31/08

In reply to Don't Worry, No One Watched The City
I think the point of reality shows should be that if you see any of the people from the show in real reality, you must try to kill them. That way, they could just keep the cameras running for constant action as the stars dodge speeding taxis and bullets. I would watch that all day long.
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PimpMyCouch
12/31/08

@BigRiver: Like The Running Man: Hills Edition? Would Jesse Ventura come back for that?
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tracyschmick
12/31/08

In reply to Don't Worry, No One Watched The City
Can someone send a memo to MTV reminding them to change there name, you know, since they don't actually play music anymore.
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AuntPenny
12/31/08

@tracyschmick: Yeah, they haven't played music there for at least ten years. It really should be renamed Suck Television.
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llamalash★
12/31/08

In reply to Don't Worry, No One Watched The City
Not only did I not watch The City, I've never seen The Hills! So take THAT, MTV!

Yet, sadly, I still know who all the major characters are and what their story supposedly is. What a sad statement that is about our pop culture.
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mathnet
12/31/08

In reply to Don't Worry, No One Watched The City
Gahlivia reminds me (and everyone else) of this sad, pinched, rich girl whom (everyone else and) I knew in college. So I'll continue watching.
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wattznext
12/31/08

@mathnet: Who pincheed her? And where...on the Tushy?

(p.s. what do you mean by pinched? I can't find an appropriate definition of it (in that context) anywhere. Do you mean she's a penny pincher, as in miserly? I'm confused)
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BookishLatkeish
12/31/08

In reply to Don't Worry, No One Watched The City
May 2009 be an outfit-free one! Happy New Year, Richard. And lots of love.
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SaraRueful
12/31/08

@BookishLookish: I started early ... I'm not wearing pants right now (working from home).

And ditto on the 2009 love to Richard. May your head not explode from watching this vapid crap.
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BookishLatkeish
12/31/08

@SaraRueful: Yeah, to paraphrase PETA, I'd rather be naked than wear an outfit!

I long for those pants-free workdays. Enjoy, toots.
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