Science Proves That Happiness Is Within, My Friends

Happiness: what is it? A new study has found the answer: it is a mathematical equation based on your own expectations. You are so very predictable, humans.
Researchers say that "the closer a nation is to the genetic makeup of Denmark, the happier that country is." Unless the Olympics are happening.
Winning Election Is "Happiest Moment, Obviously, of My Life," Says Dad
Beating Republican House Majority Leader Eric Cantor in the Virginia Republican primary yesterday was "the happiest moment, obviously, of my life," said Dave Brat, a married father of two.
This Smile-Inducing Vine Will Make You Happy Every 6 Seconds, Forever
The simple gesture of dropping off his neighbor unintentionally netted Vine user Yoeslan Alfaro one of the most sincerely happy-making moments of the summer.
Americans Are Just Not Happy
Americans are not a joyful lot at the moment, with only 33 percent of Americans reporting that they were very happy in a recent poll.
All things considered, teachers are pretty happy. Weird.
Saddest Cities in America Actually Seem More Fun Than Happiest
The statistical wizards at Men's Health have calculated the happiest and saddest cities in America. And, well, they are cities that no sane person has any business living in. But even so, their ten saddest seem a lot better?
Women Find Happiness a Turnoff
Remember that study that found cultured men to be generally happier than their uncultured counterparts? Well, there's another new study that says women are less attracted to happier guys! So what's it going to be? Cézanne and contentment? Or Michael Bay and getting laid? The choice is yours. [ScienceDaily.com, photo…
Cultured Men Are Happier
A new study finds that men who participate in "cultural activities" — either as creators or audience members — are happier those who don't. (The effect is less pronounced in women: "Men seemed to get more of a percieved health benefit from being involved in different receptive cultural activites than women did," study…
Kids These Days Pretty Sure Their Lives Will Suck
Kids these days just don't have the good attitude they used to. I believe the relentless diet of drugs, junk food, and pornography is really getting to them.
Tennessee Is the Happiest State, According to Twitter
PhD student Alex Davies has set out to discover the happiest places in the world by analyzing Tweets. A noble project! But one that may need some tweaking, given that according to his data, the happiest U.S. state is Tennessee (tied with Arizona as the eighth most-unemployed state in the union) , and the happiest…
Study: Pretty People Also Happy and Rich
A new meta-review of scientific studies over the past four decades reassuringly confirms that everything in our world is in perfect order: the beautiful people have every goddamn thing going for them.
