Olivia Lake, the baddest bitch in Poway, Calif. (source: her mom) celebrated her 18th birthday Friday night with a Playboy Mansion-themed party that took "a small army of sheriff's deputies" to shut down.

It's a dark day. The woman who crafted the best assessment of Taylor Swift that has ever been verbalized has made nice with the perpetually perky singer-songwriter. Why, Aretha? Why?

Dennis Rodman and his "all-star team" of American basketball players have landed in North Korea for an exhibition basketball game staged in honor of Kim Jong Un's birthday.

With his wife's birthday coming up in a hurry, Dan Konkel had to come up with something special, and fast.

And I mean that literally: Besides employee names, this interoffice birthday card contains all of six words.

"I'm having my first real Marilyn moment," Lady Gaga told the crowd at the "Decade of Difference" concert (celebrating the tenth anniversary of the Clinton Foundation) last night after wishing Bill Clinton a happy birthday and before launching into a rendition of "Bad Romance" cleverly retitled "Bill Romance."…

Hollywood child bride Courtney Stodden turns 17 today, reducing the age gap with her creepy actor husband Doug Hutchison to a mere 34 years. Doug gave Courtney a shopping spree at Victoria's Secret and a trip to Disneyland for her birthday.

Courtney Love celebrated her estranged daughter's eighteenth birthday a day late on Twitter: "youve done a dammed good job frances of destroying anything i could build." She's a "sell out," and Courtney knows how to "ruiinher." Happy birthday! [Buzzfeed, @CourtneyLoveUK]

Are you ready to feel old? Thomas Lennon, of The State and Reno 911 fame, turns 40 today. In this clip, Tom is serenaded by his very Weird BFF and a gaggle of rambunctious Canadians.

The grand dame of news aggregation, Huffington Post co-founder Arianna Huffington, turns 60 today. What should we give her? Last year, Arianna crowdsourced her birthday party. This year, we're going to crowdsource the ultimate Arianna Huffington birthday gift.

Signs started popping up in Chelsea yesterday imploring (gay?) passersby to order a new cocktail, the "Sweet Coopie," in honor of Anderson Cooper's 43rd birthday on June 3. Which of the brands listed on the poster paid for the stunt?

Tiger Woods is 34 today. The Huffington Post wrote something about it. But no one told Google ads that now is still not the time sell things based on Woods' athleticism. Especially not next to articles about his cheating.

White House Press Corps doyenne Helen Thomas turned 89 today! Coincidentally, today is also the day Barack Obama's grandparents chose when they forged Obama's birth certificate 48 years ago. Obama gave her cupcakes!

Barack Obama was born on this day in 1961, to Stanley Ann Dunham and Barack Obama, Sr. and Malcolm X and a communist named Frank, in Kenya. Happy Birthday, Mr. President! Or, as your parents would say, عيد ميلاد سعيد

Everyone say happy birthday to your favorite contempt-of-court correspondent! Judith Miller is 59 today. Girlfriend looks pretty good for being that close to collecting Social Security, but it's probably just that permanent emollient the White House doles out to those willing to dispense with their pesky…