Whoa there: After 18 hours of labor, a Florida woman reeled in this 14.1-pound whopper last week, one of the state's largest on record. Whatta catch!

White guys sexting: It's a documented problem that's on the rise in our thirsty, thirsty society. Fortunately, victims have been equipped with the tools to fight back: The lyrics of Smash Mouth's unforgettable 1999 earworm "All-Star."

Hallmark invented a holiday, which means I have to take off early today (But I will be drunkenly seeking refuge here from my Mom's computer room after a few minutes of family time) so I leave you with something I dearly love. From The Larry Sanders Show: "The Egging."