Less than a week after Pokémon Go’s launch, our streets are already filled with packs of phone-wielding, Weedle-catching zombies. They’re robbing our teens, filling our churches with sinners, and tricking our children into exercising. But worst of all, Pokémon Go is turning us all into an army of narcs in service of…
If there’s one thing noted Facebook user Sarah Palin hates, it’s logic. If there are two things Sarah Palin hates, though, the second is almost definitely the Democrats’ secret apocalyptic globalist agenda. Which is why Sarah Palin would like to take a moment to congratulate all those Brits who voted to leave the EU …
“Think of it as The Establishment 2.0,” says the New York Times, of the “Working Team of the Itasca Project,” a group of “14 men and women who oversee some of the biggest companies, philanthropies and other institutions in Minneapolis, St. Paul and the surrounding area,” and who meet weekly “to quietly shape the…
Behind the wealthy and famous people who appear to control global socioeconomic forces, there’s a secretive power elite hiding in the shadows, pulling the strings, and eating free food at McDonald’s. Last night, actor Rob Lowe publicly revealed himself as one of them.
Terrible animated sitcom The Family Guy aired a rerun, centered around Robin Williams, just moments before the public learned of Williams’ tragic suicide. Some of Earth’s 7 billion sentient humans suspected this meant that he had been sacrificed by the elite deviants of the Bavarian Illuminati.
Dropping from 33,000 feet above Donetsk in eastern Ukraine, Malaysia Airlines flight MH17 crashed yesterday, detonating into a dark plume of smoke upon impact with a field of bloomed wheat. The second tragedy to befall Malaysia Airlines this year, following the unresolved vanishing of flight 370, dude, it was aliens.
I never realized how not pregnant Beyoncé might have been until the Saturday premiere of her HBO documentary, Life Is But a Dream. Since announcing her pregnancy at the 2011 MTV Video Music Awards (in August of that year), there have been naysayers, referred to with tongue in cheek as "Beyoncé birthers." There was…
Getting images removed from photo agencies' websites: so hot right now. On Monday, we discovered that photos of Kanye West in his much-maligned kilt at the 12-12-12 concert were removed from Getty's site and various others. Now, controversial shots of Beyoncé have gotten the same treatment.
Well, that was one way to quiet the lip-synching haters/give credence to rumors of Illuminati: Minutes after Beyoncé's inspired performance and just moments after a record-setting kickoff return from the Baltimore Ravens' Jacoby Jones, power went out in over half of the Superdome. CBS's James Brown said the outage was…
How deep does the Super Bowl Illuminati rabbit hole go? As deep as all rabbit holes: straight into hell.
Is the 2012 London Olympics a flawed and corrupt but ultimately heartwarming celebration of athletic achievement and a sign of peace and cooperation among nations? Or is it a sinister occult ritual undertaken by the British Royal family and the Illuminati to summon ancient demons and secure their power over the…
Here are Five Surprising Things we can learn from FoxNews.com's story about how pop artists are turning to satanic imagery to drum up sales:
Why did Jay-Z and Beyoncé name their kid "Blue Ivy"? What was the deal with Madonna's Super Bowl halftime show? Why did Whitney Houston die? Some people might say that "famous people are weird and sad" is the answer to all three questions. But no, the answer is: The Illuminati. Who? Allow us to explain.
Why did Jay-Z and Beyoncé name their daughter Blue Ivy? Possibly because they are exceedingly wealthy celebrities for whom the act of procreation is chiefly an exercise in branding... or because "Blue Ivy" is a secret code revealing her membership in an ancient and all-powerful occult secret society. Which could it…
Remember that hoodie with the strange, cult-like symbol inside that Mark Zuckerberg wore to the D8 conference? In June, one was sold on eBay for over $4,000. If you're pissed about missing that chance to waste money, here's another.
Jay-Z Problem Number 76/99: A Christian rapper trying to 'beef' with him, as he accuses Mr. Beyonce of Satanism, Freemasonry, and membership in the Illuminati. Come to think of it, there is something decidedly evil about "Change Clothes." [ANIMAL NY]
Prodigy, the Mobb Deep rapper currently taking advantage of his incarceration to hone his blogging skills, is concerned about quite a few things: ritualistic murders, the 9/11 conspiracy, secret societies, missing children, and "NATURAL ENERGY LINES THAT CRISS-CROSS THE ENTIRE PLANET." How do these things all tie…
Hollywood writers are striking because studios will not give them residuals from content distributed over the Internet or through DVDs. Or are they? One of the first films already effected by the strike is Ron Howard's adaptation of Dan Brown's Angels & Demons, the sequel prequel to The Da Vinci Code. Could the…
