Now that polio is out of control in Pakistan, the White House has finally decided to let it be known that the CIA is very sorry about using public-health efforts as cover in its secret war—thereby encouraging anti-vaccination violence—and we won't do it anymore. (Unless we're lying about that, as more misdirection.)
Venezuela To Not Even Try To Be Friends with United States Anymore
The Bolivarian Republic of Venezuela, a socialist thorn in the side of capitalist United States, is not even going to bother trying to be friends with the U.S. anymore, after a series of remarks by Obama U.N. nominee Samantha Power.
'National Review' Knows Just How to Scare Liberals This Halloween
The National Review has discovered the most comical of ways to celebrate our nation's holy day, Halloween: Writing a special Halloween-themed column about how liberals are pussies! "How to Scare a Liberal to Death," is the column from real person "H.W. Crocker III," who's put together a list of the best old-timey…
No Imperialist Salmonella In These Eggs, Dear Leader
[A photo released today by the Korean Central News Agency shows North Korean leader Kim Jong-il inspecting eggs at the 927 Chicken Farm near Pyongyang. Meanwhile, in the USA, 550 million tainted eggs have been recalled. Image via AP]
NBA Jerseys Are The New Imperialism
Hard to believe our nation's star athletes have time to go to the gym and practice jumpshots or whatever, what with all their marketing strategy meetings and reality shows and plotting to invade China like the second coming of opium. Sports stars and their sponsors have known for years that China is the market of the…
