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Jake Gyllenhaal
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nonsensical gossip
gossip roundup
Robert Downey Jr. Bringing Back Blackface
- Actor Robert Downey Jr. is about to be in blackface in a movie, but it's totally OK because it's so meta: Downey will not wear blackface to pretend to be black; he will wear blackface to pretend to be a white actor pretending to be black. Totally different. [Film School Rejects via Digg]
- Singer Britney Spears' father Jamie will continue to run most of her life through the end of July, meaning her insanity will continue a steady decline that has so far mirrored falls in the dollar and stock market. Coincidence? [AP]
- As predicted by everyone in the entire world, model and famed assistant-beater Naomi Campbell flipped out when she found out news of her gynecological surgery in Brazil leaked: "Naomi was in an absolute fury that word had gotten out... The female nurse who brought her breakfast one day left the room in tears after Naomi cursed her out.” [ShowbizSpy quoting National Enquirer]
- Here's a picture of actress Angelina Jolie at an airport looking busty and otherwise pregnant. [Sun]
- Page Six has banished Patrick Swayze's rep to its Liars' Corner for saying a hospital admission earlier this month was for a "gastrointenstinal procedure" when in fact the star had pancreatic cancer. [P6]
- Movie star couple Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon are in your darkened movie theater, fucking around with their BlackBerrys. Who's a cute couple now? [P6]
- Now that he's all fit and a war hero and everything, Prince Harry's girlfriend takes him back. [Sun]
- Anna Wintour has been hanging out with basketball star and Ralph Lauren fan LeBron James before she puts him on the cover of Vogue. [P6]
- Maybe he really will, finally, lose the Neverland Ranch: singer Michael Jackson said to be looting his home before it is seized. [Showbiz Spy]
- Former rich kid Brandon Davis now asking for free drinks in bars. [P6]
Stalker Sighting: Reese Witherspoon And Jake Gyllenhaal
"Reese Witherspoon & Jake Gyllenhaal are seated right next to me at del posto. She is adorable as usual, but he is SO unbelievable hot!! They are laughing and having a great time. Love them together!!"
"Reese Witherspoon & Jake Gyllenhaal are seated right next to me at del posto. She is adorable as usual, but he is SO unbelievable hot!! They are laughing and having a great time. Love them together!!"
gossip roundup
Michelle Williams Is Getting Out Of Brooklyn
stalk of the town
Jake Gyllenhaal's Misty Acne-Covered Memories
The time: 8 p.m.
The date: September 15th
The place: 106 West Houston Street
Sighted: "Spotted everyone's favorite cowboy Jake Gyllenhaal this weekend on Houston near Arturo's. It goes without saying that he was perfectly scruffy-sexy, although he and another guy in his coterie appeared to be wearing blue terry cloth sweatbands. It did not however detract from his hotness."
an actor prepares
No more junkets for Jake Gyllenhaal—locking him in a hotel room at the Toronto Film Festival and quizzing him about waterboarding and torture for his upcoming film Rendition resulted in this meandering and actually sorta disturbing conversation on "Showbiz Tonight." Dude. You're an actor! Talk about puppies or something! He sounds like someone kept him up all night in a secret C.I.A. prison or something. Umm, if those exist.
Jake Gyllenhaal's Policy On Waterboarding Less Coherent Than Dick Cheney's
No more junkets for Jake Gyllenhaal—locking him in a hotel room at the Toronto Film Festival and quizzing him about waterboarding and torture for his upcoming film Rendition resulted in this meandering and actually sorta disturbing conversation on "Showbiz Tonight." Dude. You're an actor! Talk about puppies or something! He sounds like someone kept him up all night in a secret C.I.A. prison or something. Umm, if those exist.
connecting the dots
Jake Gyllenhaal Just Loves Chefs
"Oh No They Didn't" is alleging that chef Chris Fischer is Jake Gyllenhaal's boyfriend—Fischer was (perhaps still is?) a sous chef at Babbo. The two were most recently spotted running a race on Martha's Vineyard. That is so clearly gay! (That was sarcastic.) There are two camps of crazy gays these days: the other camp thinks that Jake and actor Austin Nichols were until recently dating. But we're going to go with Chris (even though his people have also been heard defending Chris and Jake's relationship by saying that they've been friends since childhood), because, clearly, Jake has had a thing for chefs for forever. More »
obvious mysteries solved easily
Batali And Gyllenhaal Go Way Back
In an earlier item we admitted our mind went all to mush when we tried to ponder what Braden Keil-hating chef-man Mario Batali and Jake Gyllenhaal were doing breakfasting together at Balthazar. A number of you have written in to inform us that the two families go way way back—a claim this episode of Molto Mario on which the Gyllenhaals en masse are the guests substantiates. Turns out our generation's Rock Hudson has quite a natural and easygoing relationship with your uncle's generation's Sam Kinison.
mysteries
Batali And Gyllenhaal Meet At Balthazar
A citizen journalist noted this duo in action: "Jake Gyllenhall and Mario Batali having breakfast together at Balthazar, one much cuter than the other! " Now what Batali is doing at a rival's restaurant, out in the open, is a mystery. And what he's doing with Jake Gyllenhaal, the Jean Paul Belmondo of our generation, is equally mind-fuzzying. Maybe he heard Jake's sister likes to pose topless or maybe we have a Jake + Mario restaurant in the offing. Brokeback Poutine anyone?
jake gyllenhaal
Jake Gyllenhaal Gets Wilson-Brothered By Page Six
Except it's odder than that mixup, because, well, chef Daniel Boulud and Jake Gyllenhaal are not even brothers, like, at all. Now who's drunk! More »
nicole richie
Gossip Roundup: Nicole Richie "Dehydrated"
lance armstrong
Lance Armstrong Brings Pitchers, Catchers to ESPYs
Both the Sun and the Times have acknowledged that uniballed cycling champ Lance Armstrong opened his hosting gig at ESPN's ESPY awards with an anal sex joke directed at Jake Gyllenhaal, but neither paper seems willing to clarify any further. Apparently it's okay for the press to acknowledge the presence of buttfucking humor, but not to actually entertain readers with the buttfucking humor itself. So we'll share the joke with you — if nothing else, Gawker will always support anything involving Gyllenhaal and anal. More »
helen gurley brown
Gossip Roundup: Helen Gurley Brown Tries to Seduce Ellen DeGeneres
• The original Cosmo girl, 83-year-old Helen Gurley Brown, wanted so badly to be on Ellen DeGeneres's talk show that she sent in an "audition tape" featuring her performing a choreographed dance to the best of Andrew Lloyd Webber. The adorable dinosaur even sported a leotard, but apparently that didn't arouse Ellen's libido. [Gatecrasher]• Porn star Jessica Jaymes is attempting to sell a story of her sexual encounter with Jessica Simpson's pseudo-hubby Nick Lachey for $1 million. No one's interested, perhaps because no one's really surprised. [Page Six]
• Yoko Ono is pissed that Dateline NBC commemorated the 25th anniversary of husband John Lennon's death by devoting airtime to his killer, as opposed to promoting her new book. [R&M]
• In the latest GQ, Woman of the Year Jennifer Aniston lashes out at Page Six's Richard Johnson, saying his coverage of of her breakup with Brad Pitt "was just a game to him, this sick [expletive]." Aw, Jen — Johnson's not playing games. He takes his sick shit very seriously. [Page Six]
• Jake Gyllenhaal denies rumors that he used a body double for his meat-tastic role in Jarhead. We certainly hope he didn't, or else that'll destroy the imagery for our top 5 masturbatory fantasies. [Scoop (2nd item)]
• Jenna Jameson uses MySpace.com? Strange days, people. [Lowdown (2nd item)] More »
