I know, I know! it tells us they read/write SO much fanfiction for and by 11 year olds online, that when the time comes, they can't tell what real fiction is and instead read basically the same thing, written by a 30-something, that just happens to be grammatically correct? (It's tried and true homely girl inexplicably scores hottest - and immortal OMFGZZ - guy around.)
Oh. And then we make a movie out of it.
What do I win?
If it's a Tokio Hotel and Paramore CD box set I am gonna be piiiiiissed.
I haven't seen the show (my loss, I know) but somehow gay-ish vampires don't put the fear in me. If this were real, I would not feel the need to guard myself with garlic or crosses. I'd be pretty content that a withering look would be enough to make these fey ghouls run screaming into the night.
@Ogiri W Surie: To be fair, ever since Anne Rice started the trend of Vampires being eternally young and broodingly handsome men it became kind of hard to avoid the homo-erotic thing.
I have like a 5-million word rant on this, but here's the deal. I fucking hate twilight. does stephanie meyer hate women? or does she hate herself? or does she have a terrifyingly appalling relationship? the main character is so busy fawning that she doesn't have the chance, the time, or the inclination to define herself by anything other than her vampire sweetie. and this bothers the hell out of me. when I ask my students what they want to be when they grow up, and a significant portion of the girls tell me that their life's goal is to marry one (or, oddly, sometimes more) of the jonas brothers. and that's it. no career, no travel, nothing. we are clearly not doing a good job of convincing young girls that they need to start defining themselves by what they can do and what they can be, rather than just by what kind of man might want to look at them. and this kind of crap does not help the situation one bit.
(ps: want to make the book more fun? substitute the word "teeth" whenever stephanie meyer talks about edward's golden, topaz, amber, or onyx eyes. hilarious!)
This makes much less sense than Harry Potter. I actually enjoyed the Potter books for the sheer depth of the world and the vague mystery of the characters, but these are absolutely unreadable. And I like vampires.
Maybe it's the absence of strong female characters or something. This series badly needed a Hermione.
@ADismalScience: You should read The Wheel of Time series by Robert Jordan. He's got quite a few strong female characters. Plus, the damn thing is thousands of pages long, so the depth is quite amazing.
@mmstk101: Yeah, for what, the first book and a half? Until all the female characters devolve into Xanthippean caricatures that alternate between being basically insane or fawning after the main guy, and Jordan uses the intervening pages to explore his spanking fetish.
@braak: Hah! I must have missed the spanking fetishism, but touche nonetheless. Moiraine or Egwene? Siuan? They were fairly not insane or fawning . . . Your point is a good one, though.
@number six: Let alone the dresses slashed with blue. Or shawls! I grew up reading those books, so I definitely have a soft spot in my heart for Mr. Jordan and his incredible verbosity.
My opinion? Hopefully he'll finish the damn thing.
As it stands right now my middlebrow fantasy readings are mostly comprised of anthologies and George R.R. Martin's Song of Ice and Fire, so my opinion's not worth much, I guess.
Nerd alert: if you like sex, little persons, profanity, and the majority of middle-ages European history, then you'll like SoIaF. Also, dragons.
Never heard of your Kay fellow, but I will check into it. Mind you, my favourite fantasy book of all time is Heroes Die, so again, anything I say should be taken with the most liberal grain of proverbial salt available.
@number six: @mmstk101: Allow me, please, to take a moment to recommend R. Scott Bakker's Prince of Nothing series, which starts with The Darkness That Comes Before.
@Midwesterner in NYC: I grew up with the Bunnicula books (about the rabbit vegetable vampire) and I have a hard time believing that the Twilight books stand up to such classics as Howliday Inn and the Celebrity Stalks at Midnight.
That is one unfortunate picture...why is one of them shirtless and the "mother" character in the film sitting on the ground, staring up at male cast members' crotches?
i'm 21 and I enjoyed the Twilight books... I read all 4 back to back to back to back in about a week... and while they weren't rhetorically strenuous or stimulating, they were fun to read and had a pretty exciting plot.
11/09/08
Oh. And then we make a movie out of it.
What do I win?
If it's a Tokio Hotel and Paramore CD box set I am gonna be piiiiiissed.
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HEAR HEAR!
11/09/08
(ps: want to make the book more fun? substitute the word "teeth" whenever stephanie meyer talks about edward's golden, topaz, amber, or onyx eyes. hilarious!)
11/10/08
Please, get out of my mind. Srsly.
11/09/08
Maybe it's the absence of strong female characters or something. This series badly needed a Hermione.
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For a man who dedicates twenty pages a piece to dresses "slashed with cream", he does spin a pretty good yarn, for merely fun reading.
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Ditto, haha. But now he's dead.
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My opinion? Hopefully he'll finish the damn thing.
As it stands right now my middlebrow fantasy readings are mostly comprised of anthologies and George R.R. Martin's Song of Ice and Fire, so my opinion's not worth much, I guess.
11/09/08
Have you ever read Guy Gavriel Kay? It's definitely different from Robert Jordan, but I like him a lot.
11/09/08
Nerd alert: if you like sex, little persons, profanity, and the majority of middle-ages European history, then you'll like SoIaF. Also, dragons.
Never heard of your Kay fellow, but I will check into it. Mind you, my favourite fantasy book of all time is Heroes Die, so again, anything I say should be taken with the most liberal grain of proverbial salt available.
11/09/08
Ever heard of Jeff Long? The Descent is an amazing book.
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A great big epic of fantasy and philosophy.
11/10/08
Haha, nerds. Many thanks, y'all.
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This is what it says: kids think vampires are FUCKING AWESOME. It's an eternal truth as undeniable as anything in Shakespeare or Kant.
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nah, too easy.
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I'm a fan and I'm looking forward to the movie.
oh yea... Rob Pattinson is HOT!
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god, i get sick of media sometimes i just want to go oedipus on myself
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