In your wicked Wednesday media column: Dan Rather apologizes for not understanding the Twitter, looming BusinessWeek layoffs, the Ellies go to the usual suspects, and Jason Mulgrew's book is here.

What could cure cancer, the economy, and put lovable handles on Michael Phelps? Hold that thought. On the bong I've got: Jason Mulgrew, Jeff Weiss, and Anonymous Hedgefund Dude. We are from the future.