Because everything old is new again, TNT is bringing back Dallas this summer. You remember Dallas, the show your mom watched the night you were conceived, you young whipper snapper. Get ready for round two.

Chandler's new show premiered last night where Monica's old-new show should have been, and it blew it out of the water. Also today: lots of pilot casting news including TV roles for movie people, an interesting idea for The Office's future, and a scintillating blind item.

Yes indeedy, the blonde wisp-angel is performing at this year's Oscars. Also today: turns out The Walking Dead actually does need writers, Ben Affleck might be headed to Tehran, and MTV finally says no to Lauren Conrad.

He just might be if rumors are to be believed. Also today: News about three of your favorite NBC shows, Ben Affleck mulls his next directing project, and some small bits of casting.

Actress Felicity Huffman turns 47 today. Actor and comedian Mario Cantone is turning 50. John Malkovich is 56. Violinist Joshua Bell is turning 42. Former Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle is turning 62. Dame Judi Dench is 75. Nightline co-anchor Terry Moran turns 49. American Idol judge Kara DioGuardi turns 39.…

• Lindsay Lohan could use a little good news today, especially since she's still dealing with the aftermath of her disastrous outing at Paris Fashion Week. Today is not going to be that day, unfortunately. Lohan is set to appear in court in LA a little later to answer questions about whether or not she's violated…

Desperate Housewives star Felicity Huffman is turning 46 today. Her former castmate, Jesse Metcalfe, is celebrating his 30th. Comedian Mario Cantone is 49. Violinist Joshua Bell is 41. John Malkovich is turning 55. Dame Judi Dench is 74. It's Tom Daschle's 61st birthday. Nightline co-anchor Terry Moran is turning 49.…

[Supposedly rehabbed actor Jesse Metcalfe leaving a Los Angeles bar last night; image via INF]

♦ Jennifer Aniston is finally speaking out about her breakup with Brad Pitt. In the December issue of Vogue, she says what Angelina Jolie did was "really uncool," and that she had no idea that Brad had cheated on her until she read about it afterwards. [MSNBC, NYP]
♦ The security guard who roughed-up Brad Pitt at…

♦ Madonna's neighbors in her Central Park West building aren't happy that she has turned her seventh-floor apartment into a music studio. (It was originally supposed to be an office for Guy Ritchie.) Now she stays up all night blaring music and practicing for her shows. [NYDN]
♦ Alex Rodriguez is thinking of…

Jesse Metcalfe was dumped from ABC lady soap Desperate Housewives (where he played a sexy boy toy gardener), starred in a PSA about Choices called John Tucker Must Die, went to rehab, and has now, according to new photos, reemerged, grizzled and with one large pectoral muscle. Not exactly sure what he's trying to tell…

With so little to go on as far as the identity of the squat, musclebound bruiser who gave Jesse Metcalfe a licking outside Boulevard 3 last night, we were thrilled to learn that In Touch has now officially unmasked the mystery clocker: It was Mams Taylor, who, as it turns out, is not an ugly stereotype of elderly…

I'm not a violent person, but some people are just asking to be hit. Like the annoying and untalented Jesse Metcalfe, who played a constantly shirtless gardener on Desperate Housewives and a constantly shirtless basketball player in John Tucker Must Die. Look at those abs! Seriously. Look. At. Them. I think it's good…

The cold-cocking of a minor celebrity outside a swanky Hollywood nightclub is hardly an uncommon experience, yet every time you see one—and thanks to TMZ's sleep-deprived video stormtroopers you are about to—it's as if you're experiencing the exhilarating adrenalin rush for the very first time.