Grindhouse director Robert Rodriguez apparently put together an early trailer for star-studded Mexploitation film Machete as a "Cinco de Mayo message for Arizona," featuring the likes of Jessica Alba, Lindsay Lohan, and Danny Trejo fighting violently to protect illegal immigrants from racist politicians.
We were so busy gawking at Real Housewife Danielle Staub eating dinner with skater Johnny Weir in Chelsea last night that we missed the Costume Institute Gala Benefit. Luckily fictional freelancer Betsey Morgenstern was there in our stead.
After her jihad against fish sticks, she waged war on photographers angling for a Kate Hudson upskirt. Paris Hilton has a dancefloor fun-off. Lady Gaga does not subsist on baby food. Is Julia Roberts jealous of Sandra? Thursday gossip ahoy!
Did he leave because Sandy left him? Tiger's security guards against Uchitel. Charlie Sheen can't afford to quit his terrible TV show. Jessica Alba plans to adopt. Easter Sunday's gossip roundup will rise again.
The Academy Awards have become more about the clothes and less about the awards themselves. Too bad all the ensembles are bland creations some stylist picked out. It's time to free ourselves from the tyranny of the Worst Dressed List!
Avatar is finally dethroned, but Sam Worthington is on his way up. Do you want Wheel of Fortune in 3D? Henry Winkler has a new role, and Valentine's Day gets a pre-release sequel. Welcome to a very super Trade Roundup.
[A creature identified as Jessica Alba hangs out in Park City. You know who else was there? Stephanie Pratt. Why on Earth is Stephanie Pratt at Sundance? Image via INF]
George Clooney won't let Kanye be in his telethon, Kanye ruins everything. Tara Reid gets engaged to a mysterious "billionaire." Michael Lohan abandons a puppy. Diddy's kid turns Super Sweet 16 on MTV. Thursday gossip has daddy issues.
Uber-rich playplace Saint Barthélemy suffers from the unbearable lightness of too much fabulous; Gloria Allred aims at Shaq; Mike Tyson won't be charged for beating a paparazzo; Michelle beats Barack at tennis. New year, new gossip.
• Although Tiger Woods and his wife remain "in seclusion" at their home in Florida (and are supposedly involved in "intense" marital counseling sessions), their lawyers are still ironing out a revised pre-nup. One report suggests Woods would pay his wife $5 million immediately and then $55 million if she stays with…
Lindsay Lohan's Rashomon-like love life takes three different turns in one day, Tiger Mistress #1 prepares to tell all, and the Salahis cancel Christmas. Come bathe in a sea of Thursday's gossip.
Indie mag Miller-McCune performed mathematical voodoo on a zillion movie reviews to figure out critics' favorite and least favorite actors, as well as which critics are the nicest and the meanest.
Elizabeth Edwards may have given up on her marriage. Paris Jackson knows who killed her father. Liz Taylor once tried suicide. And Palin could be trying her hand at beauty. Good morning, sunshine! Here's your Thursday morning gossip roundup!
Julianne Moore crossing a street in the meatpacking district ... Amanda Seyfried kissing boyfriend Dominic Cooper during lunch at Bar Pitti ... Carla Bruni and Nicolas Sarkozy leaving a restaurant on Madison Avenue ... Whitney Port getting out of an SUV before an appearance on Regis & Kelly ... Hugh Jackman picking…
• Gossip Girl's Kelly Rutherford got a temporary restraining order against her ex-husband, Daniel Giersch, saying that he harassed both her and her nanny, which, to add insult to injury, caused her nanny to quit. [TMZ, People]
• Randy Quaid, the actor who played Cousin Eddie in the National Lampoon's Vacation…
Ryan O'Neal is a creepy man, Billy Joel has a sad over the breakup of his marriage, Jude Law fell for the "I'm on the pill" con, David Beckham is scared of Shaquille O'Neal and Jessica Alba frolics.
Kim Cattrall standing in front of Le Bilboquet on East 63rd Street .... Jessica Alba going to dinner at the Waverly Inn ... Jennifer Lopez on the set of her new movie, The Back-Up Plan ... Stephanie Pratt shopping in SoHo ... Bruce Willis watching Paul McCartney's concert at the Ed Sullivan Theater with wife Emma…
• Just when you thought Lindsay Lohan couldn't do anything to surprise you: It seems $400,000 worth of Christian Dior jewelry went missing following an Elle photo shoot in London. The last person to see it? That would be Lohan, who is now being sought by investigators for questioning. [NYDN, TMZ]
• Despite rumors to…
Paris Hilton dumps her toolish boyfriend, Shia LaBeouf issues a statement to let everyone know he's not boning his mother, Victoria Beckham's nipples tour London, Jessica Alba is under investigation for vandalism, and Jeremy Piven preaches about mercury poisoning.
• The British paparazzi have seen it all over the years, but even they were surprised by a shopping expedition by Beyoncé in London last week. The singer required two chauffeur-driven cars/limos and a small army of bodyguards to escort her to the store. Even though it happened to be located about 15 yards from the…
