Oh look who's naked: Jesus Luz, the young boyfriend of pop singer/Crimean War veteran Madonna, has been snapped in the nude. Well, we only think it's him. 'Cause there's no head.

• The first photos of Tiger Woods at Mississippi sex rehab facility he's been staying at have arrived. He's wearing a hoodie, baseball cap, and pair of shorts in the pics. And he has a not-so-happy expression on his face, which is probably how you'd respond, too, if you were in sex rehab and you walked out of your…

• The messiest TV feud in years may be nearing its end. Conan O'Brien and NBC are said to be close to signing a deal that would allow Conan to walk away from The Tonight Show with $32.5 million in hand. He wouldn't be able to host a show on another network until September under terms of the agreement. And it remains…

Aniston and Butler are obsessive-compulsive fake-romance rumormongers. Madonna tries for a baby Jesus, Britney sinks to a new low, Kate Moss gets engaged, Kim Kardashian will get a wedding ring when Reggie gets his Superbowl one. Here comes Tuesday gossip.

Madonna heading into Adour on East 55th Street last night to reportedly meet her ex-husband, Sean Penn, for dinner ... Madonna and Jesus Luz bundled up and wearing face masks as they leave a movie theater after catching a screening of Avatar on Wednesday night ... Steve Schirripa and Michael Imperioli sitting in the…

It's been quite a ride for Jesus Luz, the Brazilian model most famous for serving as Madonna's arm candy since the two met in Rio last December (and bonded over their shared enthusiasm for Kabbalah, apparently). A year ago Luz was making $500 a day as a model. These days—and like several other people better known…

The mysterious enigma that is Jesus (Luz), Madonna's 22 year-old Brazilian model/DJ boyfriend, got the Sunday Styles profile treatment this weekend. It is, in a word: hysterical.

Have you noticed that more and more social scenesters, models, and offspring of the rich and famous have morphed into DJs? It's a trend, as W points out:

• Was Lindsay Lohan dating Heath Ledger at the time of his death? That was what came out yesterday when the latest clip from Michael Lohan's vast archive of recorded phone conversations was posted online. (Dina Lohan can be heard expressing concern that Lindsay was headed down the same path.) On tap for today? A…

• A judge has granted a temporary restraining order barring Jennifer Lopez's ex, Ojani Noa, from distributing a sex tape starring his former wife/benefactor. The order is only in effect for a day and another hearing is scheduled for today, so J. Lo's sex-filled 1997 honeymoon may still see the light of day yet. [TMZ…

Russell Brand's house is for sale (so he can move in with Katy Perry?), Pam Anderson pulls a Blanche DuBois, and Robert Pattinson has poor hygiene. Welcome to Tuesday's gossip.

• Are Beyoncé and Jay-Z making plans to have a baby? Perhaps. In a recent interview, Jay "let it slip that procreating is high on the duo's priority list right now." [NYDN]
• Madonna seems to be taking the next step with boyfriend Jesus Luz. She's reportedly jetting to Brazil to meet Luz's parents, including his mom…

Billy Joel heading into a cigar club with "an unidentified pretty brunette" ... Madonna visiting a doctor's office uptown and later leaving the Standard Hotel with Jesus Luz in tow ... Samuel L. Jackson crossing the street in Midtown ... Adrien Brody chilling in the West Village ... Kelly Ripa picking up daughter Lola…

• Madonna is reportedly "taking a more active role" in promoting boy toy Jesus Luz's career. She turned up to hear him spin at the Valentino party the other night, danced with "some hot fashion guys," mingled for a little, and then they left together. But that doesn't mean she's offered to do a song with him. "There…

Rihanna and Chris Brown continue to use domestic violence to sell things, the Hoff beats up old people, Clinton and Bush refuse to savage each other for money, Madonna may or may not be a bad girlfriend, and more!

Wow. Do we have a special one today. Jon Gosselin, seeking help from a rabbi. Alex Rodriguez thinks he's a centaur. Jessica Simpson's man requirements. Lady Gaga's ballet. RobPatz's marriage prospects. Presenting your epic Halloween Morning Gossip Roundup. Get scared:

• The gloves are off in the divorce between ex-model Stephanie Seymour and mogul Peter Brant. He claims she blows through $257,000 a month (including $50K a month on clothing alone); has been stealing and/or smashing some of his "pricey art objects"; has a history of abusing drugs; and has been bringing her…

• Jeremy Piven, now fully recovered from his bout with mercury poisoning, has been squiring lots of women around town in recent days. He was out with "a super-pretty African American girl" last Friday; a day later, he was at the Rangers season opener with "a gorgeous blond." Let this be another reminder, however,…

• Despite several tabloid reports yesterday that Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel had broken up, they were photographed holding hands on Monday in Santa Barbara. So what's going on? "Things have been rocky the last few months, but they're working it out," one source tells the Post. ("They've been spending more…

• Things are heating up between Justin Timberlake and Rihanna. "Hot grinding sessions," "steamy private after-parties," "impromptu lap dances," and non-stop texting sessions have all been on the agenda in recent days, at least if you're buying what the Star's "sources" are selling. [Star]
• Madonna will do anything…