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New York, 7:00 PM
Wed Dec 2
51 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #jobs more →

    Google Rejects Awesome People So It Doesn't Hog All of Them

    I Have a Dream That One Day Blacks And Whites Will Die Together in Poverty

    How to Get In and Out of Journalism Alive

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Pope John Peeps II Pope John Peeps II
    04:25 PM

    In reply to Google Rejects Awesome People So It Doesn't Hog All of Them
    Wandering the halls of Google one day, I came across a load of bullshit.

    "Hey, I said. I know a whole lot of other loads of bullshit that I'd like to bring on board and present at the next conference."

    The load of bullshit stopped me

    "No," said the load of bullshit, "it's important to save some loads of bullshit for later conferences. It's important to the ecosystem. After all, if we concentrate our loads of bullshit in one conference, we won't have any other loads of bullshit to spread around later."

    That's great, I said. Then I killed myself.
     Reply
    Pope John Peeps II was starred Pope John Peeps II was unstarred
    Image of Botswana Meat Commission FC Botswana Meat Commission FC
    02:15 PM

    In reply to Google Rejects Awesome People So It Doesn't Hog All of Them
    In the new economy we're all superstars.
     Reply
    Botswana Meat Commission FC was starred Botswana Meat Commission FC was unstarred
    Image of HenryLovesFonzie HenryLovesFonzie
    01:37 PM

    In reply to Google Rejects Awesome People So It Doesn't Hog All of Them
    "It's not that I don't love you, it's just that you're such a good guy you need to get out there and share yourself with other women. It'll be better for us both in the long run."
     Reply
    HenryLovesFonzie was starred HenryLovesFonzie was unstarred
    Image of BadUncle BadUncle
    01:17 PM

    In reply to Google Rejects Awesome People So It Doesn't Hog All of Them
    This just makes me want to snuggle up to my Google pillow and dream Googley dreams of Googleness.
     Reply
    BadUncle was starred BadUncle was unstarred
    Image of MiracleDrug MiracleDrug
    01:28 PM

    @BadUncle: Just makes me wanna take Google into my arms and lay it down and Google it.
     Reply
    BadUncle promoted this comment Edited by MiracleDrug at 12/02/09 1:29 PM MiracleDrug was starred MiracleDrug was unstarred
    Image of NYM NYM
    01:41 PM

    @BadUncle: This just makes me want to Google into the toilet.
     Reply
    NYM was starred NYM was unstarred
    Image of Seeräuber Jenny Seeräuber Jenny
    01:10 PM

    In reply to Google Rejects Awesome People So It Doesn't Hog All of Them
    We'd love to hire you, but you're just too damned ... GOOD.

    (Although it's easy to propound in a total buyer's market, the theory does make some sense.)
     Reply
    Edited by Seeräuber Jenny at 12/02/09 1:10 PM Seeräuber Jenny was starred Seeräuber Jenny was unstarred
    Image of Thatcornellguy Thatcornellguy
    01:01 PM

    In reply to Google Rejects Awesome People So It Doesn't Hog All of Them
    So...according to Google, you can sustain yourself and pay for things with your awesomeness alone? You don't need a job or a paycheck for that?
     Reply
    Thatcornellguy was starred Thatcornellguy was unstarred
    Image of AzureTexan AzureTexan
    01:00 PM

    In reply to Google Rejects Awesome People So It Doesn't Hog All of Them
    That's the logic God will use when he rejects my entry to Heaven. Right?
     Reply
    AzureTexan was starred AzureTexan was unstarred
    Image of Lysergic Asset Lysergic Asset
    12:56 PM

    In reply to Google Rejects Awesome People So It Doesn't Hog All of Them
    I heard they stole that tactic from Gawker Media.
     Reply
    Lysergic Asset was starred Lysergic Asset was unstarred
    Image of Claire Buoyant Claire Buoyant
    12:55 PM

    In reply to Google Rejects Awesome People So It Doesn't Hog All of Them
    I'll be sure to put "I'm too good for Google" on my resume right away.
     Reply
    Edited by Claire Buoyant at 12/02/09 12:56 PM Claire Buoyant was starred Claire Buoyant was unstarred
    Image of rmric0.wedding.photographer.and.manny rmric0.wedding.photographer.and.manny
    03:50 PM

    @Claire Buoyant: Don't forget to add that you're also too cool for school.
     Reply
    rmric0.wedding.photographer.and.manny was starred rmric0.wedding.photographer.and.manny was unstarred
    Image of Uncle_Billy_Slumming Uncle_Billy_Slumming
    05:38 PM

    @Claire Buoyant: Let's not forget Bing. One can also be too beautiful for Steve Bing.
     Reply
    Uncle_Billy_Slumming was starred Uncle_Billy_Slumming was unstarred
    Image of Helio Helio
    12/01/09

    In reply to I Have a Dream That One Day Blacks And Whites Will Die Together in Poverty
    first: I'm very good friends with one of the guys quoted in the Black Dudes Still Can't Get A Job No Matter What They Do story. Hopefully, if someone googles him before an interview (do people do this?) it will guilt someone into hiring him! I am googleable by a quote I gave to the Times, but it's a really stupid one about Barack Obama.

    Second: every time I glance in the direction of my diploma, then glance at the stack of loan bills which just replaced the "$0.00 due," with real numbers I get angry at myself for having a really foreign name/not becoming an engineer. Curse you, prestigious university for not living up to your end of the deal!
     Reply
    Edited by Helio at 12/01/09 4:52 PM Helio was starred Helio was unstarred
    Image of ParahSalin ParahSalin
    12/01/09

    @Helio: You think you've got it tough. I found out this weekend that someone I went out on a date with in my youth, and blew off because I didn't think she was good enough for me, is a celebrity journalist with her own TV show making mad money. I could have been part of a celebrity power gay couple, without having to bring any celebrity or power of my own to the table. Christ, why didn't I recognize my own inadequacies and just marry well? She's in People magazine, and I'm buying a helper to stretch my hamburger budget. Now, if you'll all excuse me, I think I need to go and weep.
     Reply
    Helio promoted this comment ParahSalin was starred ParahSalin was unstarred
    Image of If_I_Had_a_Poodle If_I_Had_a_Poodle
    12/01/09

    In reply to I Have a Dream That One Day Blacks And Whites Will Die Together in Poverty
    This is true. My husband is a white white white man who looks like Senior Middle Management from Central Casting, Circa 1963, and the way he is treated just walking into a room, the respect he is accorded just for looking like that, bugs the living crap out of me. He is smart and worked hard and has lots of degrees, but he is granted authority based on appearance that people who don't look like that won't have for at least another 50 years -- just for showing up.
     Reply
    If_I_Had_a_Poodle was starred If_I_Had_a_Poodle was unstarred
    Image of Dirty_Terry Dirty_Terry
    12/01/09

    @If_I_Had_a_Poodle: This reminds me of the Jon Hamm episode of 30 Rock.
     Reply
    Trulymadlyme promoted this comment Dirty_Terry was starred Dirty_Terry was unstarred
    Image of If_I_Had_a_Poodle If_I_Had_a_Poodle
    12/01/09

    @Dirty_Terry: Yes
     Reply
    If_I_Had_a_Poodle was starred If_I_Had_a_Poodle was unstarred
    Image of AzureTexan AzureTexan
    12/01/09

    In reply to I Have a Dream That One Day Blacks And Whites Will Die Together in Poverty
    "Experts say your best strategy is not 'going to college.' Instead, it is 'Being white.'

    The experts did caution, however, that this is poor advice for those wishing to become NBA power forwards and/or gangsta rappers.
     Reply
    AzureTexan was starred AzureTexan was unstarred
    Image of ambitious ambitious
    12/01/09

    @AzureTexan: Nothings says fresh and topical like "gangsta rappers."

    Very Mad TV.
     Reply
    Edited by ambitious at 12/01/09 4:06 PM ambitious was starred ambitious was unstarred
    Image of pollyannacowgirl pollyannacowgirl
    12/01/09

    @AzureTexan: Honestly, this is what happened to me (it wasn't a strategy). I don't have a degree, but people assume I do, since I look and speak a certain way. I've certainly gone a lot farther than I should have.
     Reply
    Trulymadlyme promoted this comment pollyannacowgirl was starred pollyannacowgirl was unstarred
    Image of AzureTexan AzureTexan
    12/01/09

    @pollyannacowgirl: Conversely, I have a college degree but still can't figure out the "setup" function of my remote control. Go figure.
     Reply
    AzureTexan was starred AzureTexan was unstarred
    Image of Mrs. Beeton Mrs. Beeton
    12/01/09

    In reply to I Have a Dream That One Day Blacks And Whites Will Die Together in Poverty
    But what if Black people go to a college that teaches them how to be White? BYU or some such thing.
     Reply
    Mrs. Beeton was starred Mrs. Beeton was unstarred
    Image of howYOUdoin howYOUdoin
    12/01/09

    @Mrs. Beeton: I think they have to go to the college where whites are taught to see black people as if they were white.

    Or some such thing.
     Reply
    Mrs. Beeton promoted this comment howYOUdoin was starred howYOUdoin was unstarred
    Image of The Real JR The Real JR
    12/01/09

    In reply to I Have a Dream That One Day Blacks And Whites Will Die Together in Poverty
    I, too, look forward to when food stamps will be issued with the face of Mr. Drummond because he also had a crackhead daughter who lost her baby to the state, did some porn and held up a dry cleaners cause of course that's where the big money is (ask Mr. Jefferson) and he would have probably been in foreclosure and on gubment Medicare after Maddoff took his money if NBC shows were real-life... just to remind both Blacks & Whites how everything just evens out while you're waiting for your styrofoam plate of steamed crablegs with broccoli bought with a book of WhatchooTalkinBouts. (Food stamps still come in books of bills, right? Man I'm old school.)
     Reply
    The Real JR was starred The Real JR was unstarred
    Image of Uncle_Billy_Slumming Uncle_Billy_Slumming
    12/01/09

    @The Real JR:
     Reply
    Uncle_Billy_Slumming was starred Uncle_Billy_Slumming was unstarred
    Image of BookishLookish BookishLookish
    12/01/09

    @The Real JR: But Real, what of Florence!!? And what does Dana Plato have to do with this, she was on another show, right?
     Reply
    BookishLookish was starred BookishLookish was unstarred
    Image of Volsciana Volsciana
    11/30/09

    In reply to How to Get In and Out of Journalism Alive
    By the way, did you ever get to the bottom of who hired that Private Eye to investigate you Hamilton?
     Reply
    Volsciana was starred Volsciana was unstarred
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