Light As a Feather, Stiff As a ________
[Frump Jonas, Hunk Jonas, and Hip Jonas film something surf-themed. Image via Pacific Coast News]
I Had a Super Time!
[Disney Channel stars Demi Lovato and Nicole Anderson with their dates, Nick Jonas and Joe Jonas (who is very into this situation, you know, sex-wise) after a romantic date in Los Feliz. Image via Bauer-Griffin]
The Voodoo of Kim Kardashian's Ginormous Ass on Reggie Bush's Last Meal
Kim Kardashian's gigantic ass and chewtoy/boyfriend—New Orleans Saints player Reggie Bush—descend on Miami. Let Diddy be Diddy. Madonna's vagina is funny. Kristen Stewart got someone fired. Tiger Woods: excited to jack off? Presenting your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup.
Nick Jonas Rocks It Out Solo on Late Night
Nick Jonas wanted to go solo for a change, and his new band—Nick Jonas & The Administration—is the result. Tonight, Jonas performed the title track of his upcoming album, Who I Am, on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon
The Gossip You Missed While You Were on Your Holiday Break
Even though you had the week between Christmas and New Year's off doesn't mean celebs stopped living their lives and the world stopped reporting on it. Here is a catch-up for all you missed while away from the Internet.
Charlie Sheen's Wife Wants to Drop Restraining Order Because 'Love' Is a Crazy, Terrible Thing
As the Sheen-Mueller cycle of violence rounds another bend, we have no choice but to end the year depressingly. Tracy Morgan buys lube, Kate Hudson goes "psycho," Jonases contemplate break-up. Should auld gossip be forgot: Thursday gossip lang syne.
Rihanna: All Girlfriends Owe Their Abusive Boyfriends Nudie Pics
"I feel bad" for boyfriends whose girlfriends don't send them XXX self-portraits, says Rihanna; Tiger Woods' sexy texts messages are out; LiLo and SamRo make nice. Wednesday's gossip is one nip slip short of a tabloid triathlon.
Rosie O'Donnell Is Simply Irresistible
• Rosie O'Donnell told Howard Stern yesterday that she "had a chance to romance" Angelina Jolie back when they were both single and they talked on the phone a few times, but they never ended going out for dinner as planned, alas. She also says Petra Nemcova once sent her "love signals" when the model was a guest on…
Jennifer Aniston Must Compete with Gerard Butler's War Pug for Affection
Jennifer Aniston: now eliciting tabloid sympathy. Scott Rudin: still a dick, but a funny one who hates his mother. Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart: prisoners of the vampire kingdom, which needs to go. Winehouse: mess-y. Presenting your Sunday Morning Gossip Roundup:
Renee Zellweger is the Tiger in Bradley Cooper's Bathroom
Bradley Cooper and Renee Zellweger are so doing it, Kevin Jonas is engaged, Hayden Panetierre is totally naked in her new movie, Tinsley Mortimer is dating a German aristocrat and Mischa Barton gets kicked out of a London nightclub's bathroom.
Farrah, Late Night Ratings & Anderson's Mea Culpa
• ABC and NBC will face off on Thursday night with competing tributes to Farrah Fawcett, who died today. But you probably expected that, no? [NYT]
• David Letterman beat out Conan in the ratings last week, the first time the Late Show has dominated the weekly ratings since 2005. [THR]
• Rosie O'Donnell will debut a…
Jonas Bro Invades DC, Befriends Old Men
Nick Jonas (not the ugly one) (but not the cute one?) testified on Capitol Hill today, and guess who acted like a bunch of tween girls: the mothers of tween girls, and the DC press corps. And a Senator!
Littlest Jonas Reluctantly Gets Into Position
[Nick Jonas flanked by his two brothers, Joe and Kevin, outside the Letterman show yesterday; image via INF]
Britney Rocks Britain With Decadent Sex Parties
Britney is planning the "filthiest aftershow party" to ever hit the UK, Lady Gaga wants to bang all the Jonas Brothers at the same time, Lindsay Lohan is seeking to enter fashion as a "creative consultant," and the Susan Boyle crazy breakdown story gets even sadder.
Text Messaging Destroying the Thumbs of America's Youth says New York Times
Teenagers! They're out there, genuflecting at the altar of the Jonas Brothers and finger-banging in the backs of buses on the way to field trips and doing whatever else teenagers do these days. But did you know that text messaging is completely destroying all hope for their future?
Paris Fashion Week Wraps Up
• Paris Fashion Week came to a conclusion today with a memorable show by John Galliano and Marc Jacobs' collection for Louis Vuitton, which, shockingly, only started seven minutes late. [NYT, Telegraph, WWD, WSJ]
• Want to see Project Runway return to the air? Heidi Klum suggests demonstrating outside Harvey…
Gun-Wielding Madea Bravely Fends Off Be-Hotpanted Jonas Brothers
Good morning and happy, miserable Monday everyone. (Snow on the East, rain on the West). While you cower inside, away from the elements, ponder over the weekend box office report and wonder... why?
Barbara Walters Asks Your Burning Oscar Night Questions
While you were busy ogling pretty ladies in pretty dresses, ABC was airing Barbara Walters' investigative report on the really important issues. Such as: Is Joe Jonas a jerk? And is Hugh Jackman gay?
Anti-Trump Mobs Are Not Rioting in the Streets
The mob gathered outside the Trump International Hotel is not comprised of outraged Trump Entertainment shareholders who watched the company file for bankruptcy protection for the third time today. Apparently they're crazy tweens hoping to catch a glimpse of the Jonas Brothers. But at least if Donald Trump is…
A Tale Of Two Grammys: Radiohead Bludgeons The Jonas Brothers
If the incoming Oscar producers are serious about their pledge to detonate the awards show and rebuild from scratch, may they take two imperative lessons from Sunday night's Grammy telecast:
