"There is nothing worse than the awkward wake up next to a girl, who is not as hot as you thought she was when you were 12 deep the night before." Just imagine how she feels waking up to your mug, Chris! Why is it that ugly guys feel entitled to bang hot chicks even though his face looks like an asshole?
Figures he'd be wearing a Red Sox cap. Amazing, too, that a guy who's probably never been laid in his life would write a column about getting laid. #media
Maybe instead of charging the paper with harassment, Fairfield University could close The Mirror down for failing completely at its mission statement. I get that newspapers are a dying medium, but editors are still supposed to edit and journalists are still supposed to have some basic understanding of grammar, punctuation, syntax, and how to craft a narrative.
On the other hand, that article definitely makes a fierce case for abstinence, so maybe the Society of Jesus is having the last laugh here. #media
On the flip side, I'm suing Fairfield University's student paper for using my trademarked term "raw dog" (though, admittedly, I coined it while describing a Korean sushi bar, not unprotected sex). #journalismism
Is it just me or does anyone else find more than vestigial traces of irony in that our focal point's surname sounds
suspiciously like some third-rate feminine hygiene product?
Wait a second, given that he arguably qualifies as a third-rate douche, cancel that last query.
Peripherally, it should be noted in an attempt to appear more worldly that Mr. Surette "went metric" quite some time ago, so that reference to being "12-deep" is centimeters, or in the alternative, his IQ.
I think he is providing a valuable service for cretins in a language they can understand. Unfortunately, there is a significant percentage of cuties who are willing to raw dog it and they need to know the 411 on preventing a rash or perhaps a mini-me. He possesses a unique and spirited voice that informs us of the hazards of rationalizing things when in a state of 12-deeptitude.
Additionally I feel that somewhere at some point we've all had a hearty laugh and said to ourselves, "I just don't care whether or not I'm capable of sexually pleasing a woman."
I'd argue that this guy was not going to get laid anyways.
I mean, Jesus. Look at him. What sexual experience could he possibly have had that didn't involve a sock and his own pasty, clammy hand? #media
Ah, I remember the good old days when I could write an embarassingly awful column for my Catholic college's newspaper and no one on campus would read it, never mind the entire internet. #media
The "He Said / She Said" columns used to be the funniest part of The Mirror... too bad this moron had to go fuck it up. In reality, the columns have been overrun with idiots like Chris for a few years now. If I were President von Arx, I'd kick him out. #media
@Conchie Birdie: I worked for that paper back when I went there, it was never funny, it was always lowest level humor, copying Adam Sandler-type jokes when they were popular, then Will Farrell-type, and I guess now Tucker Max. #media
@pmarble: Fairfield U. is a real school that so many commenters apparently attended? It sounds like one of the campus backgrounds for a 3 Stooges short.
@Fitz21and1: Gotcha. To be fair, I really only enjoyed the She Said - and my friend wrote it. Plus, to be the funniest part of that paper isn't really saying much.
@pmarble: I knew it would find it funny - that's why I disclosed the entire name! #media
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On the other hand, that article definitely makes a fierce case for abstinence, so maybe the Society of Jesus is having the last laugh here. #media
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suspiciously like some third-rate feminine hygiene product?
Wait a second, given that he arguably qualifies as a third-rate douche, cancel that last query.
Peripherally, it should be noted in an attempt to appear more worldly that Mr. Surette "went metric" quite some time ago, so that reference to being "12-deep" is centimeters, or in the alternative, his IQ.
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Additionally I feel that somewhere at some point we've all had a hearty laugh and said to ourselves, "I just don't care whether or not I'm capable of sexually pleasing a woman."
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I mean, Jesus. Look at him. What sexual experience could he possibly have had that didn't involve a sock and his own pasty, clammy hand? #media
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@pmarble: I knew it would find it funny - that's why I disclosed the entire name!
#media
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