Brian, isn't this an opportunity for Gawker to send in an investigative journalist to find out if he is likes the guys? Who could take on that assignment? How about you?
@adiam7: Aww, I understand that it's difficult to accept it, but you'll be better off in the end. Just like when you take the one straight drama kid to prom, and cry when he gets drunk and makes out with that young, male debate coach who is chaperoning.
NO, Brian, NO. He is all we straights have. Do you understand how infrequently this sort of beautiful wanders into our camp? No, of course you don't. How could you? Well, the answer is never, Brian. Never. How dare you try to take this away from us?
That second item confused me until I realized you were talking about my dear friend WILLIAM Joel. I'm terribly sad to hear that he's upset, but he should know that Europeans are, in fact, far superior to Americans. Now, if you'll please excuse me, I have a chicken to cook.
@Swifter: I was making fun of Gwyneth Paltrow, but apparently I struck a nerve. For the record, I'm not one to posit any kind of ethnic supremacy, and even if I were, I doubt I'd do it in the comments of a gossip round-up.
Gwynneth is onto something. When garden snails are rounded up from escargot ranches for processing, they're starved for three days before slaughter as a cleansing process. I'm sure a single escargot day is equal to a Paltrow week. And so, in the end, Gwyneth will probably taste delicious in butter and garlic.
Cajun, we don't want Brit. And it's not like you don't have some Jewish down there in Louisiana already. We want Charmaine Neville or someone with some real talent.
09/10/09
...and yes, you will wonder where your Ipod nano went.
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Truth is, most of the Europeans with the desire and talent to make a better world for themselves and their children are Americans now.
08/03/09
(Apologies for the double post, above.)
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The second single: I am not a goy, not yet a Jew.
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/golf clap.
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