Gawker wedding expert Phyllis Nefler has some thoughts, and those thoughts include pigs in a blanket and the bleakness of the bouquet toss.

Lindsay Lohan spent Yom Kippur atoning and partying. George Clooney meets his girlfriend's parents. Bruno Mars arrested for drug possession. Tom Cruise's Top Gun love interest gets gay-married.

After his Details shoot with a naked woman and talking about his deep lady love, Adam Lambert continues to do a shitty job convincing us he has any interest in female genitalia. This time it's for homo mag Out.

First gay housewives, now lesbian housewives? We've seen everything. Or, we will, because Showtime picked up nine episodes of a new Sapphic reality show. Yay! It's title? Not so new: The L-Word: Los Angeles.

Courtney Love turns 45 today. Tom Hanks is turning 53. Jack White is 34. Jimmy Smits is 54. Floyd Abrams, the famed First Amendment attorney (and father of Dan), turns 73. Author/neurologist Oliver Sacks is turning 76. Former defense secretary Donald Rumsfeld is 77. ACLU honcho Anthony Romero is 44. AIDS activist …

Sean Penn and Rihanna are in the midst of breakups; Elizabeth Edwards is reflecting on her awful near breakup and Kelly McGillis found out she's lesbian after two marriages.