Gawker: kenneth cole

Kenneth Cole's Clever Wordplay Saves Economy

Hamilton Nolan — Mon, 23 Feb 2009 15:33:49 EST

Professional designer and amateur writer of excruciating ad copy Kenneth Cole knows times are tough as leather. Maybe it's not fashion-able, but he's optimistic America will design a solution to sew up all these problems!

Maybe it's time for a velvet revolution—and Kenneth Cole will be right there to guide you down the runway to economic success!

 As bad as it is, many feel today that whatever you call it, the other shoe still hasn't dropped - an event of which they seem to be awaiting nervously. (Never before have so many been so attentive to what I do for a living). People are running for COVER - many to cover their ASSets, while we are trying to cover their backs (and other body parts). 

But Kenneth, what if people are not ready to wear your sense of hope?

With that said, in the interest of self preservation, perhaps we have to go back to being "clothes minded"? If you look good, you'll feel good about being in your shoes, and probably increase your own interest rate. Being an accessory to change may even reward you with the chance to share your own stimulus package. 

Shut up. Just shut right up. [Kenneth's blog via Copyranter]

Kenneth Cole's Bad Slogans Cut Across Party Lines

Hamilton Nolan — Thu, 06 Nov 2008 11:38:12 EST

Middling designer Kenneth Cole is well known for writing his own pun-tastic advertising copy after only seconds of thought, and he hasn't lost his razor-sharp mind. Yesterday there was already a Kenneth Cole billboard up for Obama's election: "A precedent we can be proud of.—Kenneth Cole." He had one ready for a McCain election, too: "Out with the old...In with the older.—Kenneth Cole." In case of a third party victory, he could have gone with: "OMG I'm so surprised I didn't even think one up! Well okay how about like, 'Third is the word.' Yea, I like that because it has, like, different levels. Raoul, send that one over to the billboard people.—Kenneth Cole." [NYT]

Somebody Please Pun-ch Kenneth Cole. Get It?

Hamilton Nolan — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 13:47:30 EDT

Kenneth Cole is not just a middling designer and outspoken advocate for responsible journalism; he's also, for reasons we can't fathom (narcissism), his own advertising copywriter. A bad advertising copywriter. It's not every CEO of a massive fashion brand that's too cheap to hire someone to write his own billboard taglines. But in Kenneth Cole's case, coming up with them only robs him of mere seconds of thought. That's how his poor clothing line ends up with billboards like this one on Houston St.—presumably the balls are there to distract you from the slogan itself:

[via Copyranter]

Those Who Would Fight To Destroy This Great Nation

Hamilton Nolan — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 18:23:30 EDT

Middling designer and anti-patriot Kenneth Cole's blog declares that the USA's awesome title as most drugged-out country in the entire world is "A Number One We Don't Want To Be." Better ask your models about that, man. [Awearness Blog]

Kenneth Cole Is Vaguely Outraged

Hamilton Nolan — Thu, 20 Mar 2008 18:02:30 EDT

Middling designer Kenneth Cole is upset that tawdry media outlets these days spend all their time covering sensational stories, rather than important things like, you know, his blog, for which he is plastering ads all over NYC. It's not that his underlying point is wrong—the media does specialize in "fueling the paranoia." The problem is the cognitive dissonance involved in being lectured by Kenneth Cole in a blog post titled, "Is Responsible Journalism an Oxymoron?" I'll tell you what's an oxymoron: "Kenneth Cole... good." Yea, score one for the media!

Long Island Slaver Suing Armani Over Perfume

jliu — Sat, 19 May 2007 12:30:43 EDT

If this weekend's Journal Pursuits is to be believed, the centuries-long mega-trend of boys who want to be pretty like girls has colonized one more of the 5.5 human senses. Guys are buying perfumes by the likes of Burberry, John Varvatos, as well as Kenneth Cole's R.S.V.P., and Tom Ford's "Tuscan Leather" and "Tobacco Vanille"—many of which are "more evocative of women's perfumes than traditional male fragrances." But compared to such foppish florals, say the Journal's sniffers, Armani's new Attitude "exudes old-school machismo" with its lemon-coffee- lavender-cedar blend and Zippo-lighter bottle. Then again, Armani's new scent—let's call it 'Tude!—and its manliness might actually stem from something else altogether, according to crazy court records.

As the Daily News reports, it turns out that the two-of-a-kind Long Island couple charged earlier this week with beating, knifing, and caging their Indonesian domestics, have filed some olfactory court action of their own:

Accused Long Island slave master Mahender Sabhnani announced yesterday he's suing L'Oreal and Giorgio Armani perfumes for alleged trademark infringement of his men's cologne, Attitude, the Daily News has learned....
Sabhnani contends he launched Attitude in 1995 and that it is sold nationwide. Then in March, Sabhnani read in Women's Wear Daily that L'Oreal was promoting a men's cologne with the same name.

He did some checking and found out that the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office had canceled his trademark because he had neglected to file some paperwork, and L'Oreal applied to use the name last December, the complaint says. Giorgio Armani Perfumes is a division of L'Oreal.

So yes, that musk you're wearing is a Designer Imposters knockoff of authentic bondage. Could have been worse, tough: at least you didn't choose that pansy "R.S.V.P.," with those manhood-extinguishing wet grasses and soft cashmeres. Regrets only.

Scent of a Woman—Sold For a Man [WSJ]
Long Island 'slave master' smells lawsuit [NYDN]

You Can Support AIDS Research Even Without Buying Kenneth Cole's T-Shirt

Jesse — Thu, 01 Dec 2005 16:10:04 EST

Today is, as we hope you know, World AIDS Day, and it's as good a time as any to remember that, two decades into the pandemic, millions of people worldwide are still dying and there is still no cure. This year, AmFAR chairman and lefty shoe designer Kenneth Cole created the "We All Have AIDS" awareness campaign. While it has goals we share and a King Christian of Denmark sensibility we admire, we're entirely unconvinced that selling this particular t-shirt is necessarily the best way to raise money for the cause.

Might we suggest simply donating directly to AmFAR instead?

We All Have AIDS [Official site]
AmFAR [Official site]

Pressing Questions From the Fashion Industry

Jessica — Mon, 21 Nov 2005 15:01:32 EST

In the face of natural disaster, we too wonder what the fuck to wear. A riveted hobo bag really would go nicely with those deadly muscles aches and pains.

Kenneth Cole Sucks [Fish Drink Water]